Dirge
by Koji Inari
Summary: Cloud has been reduced to living on the outskirts of a city that doesn't want him, living in a gang to survive. But one night things go horribly wrong and he has to bring in a new recruit. Will Riku change his life? [RikuXCloud Yaoi rape COMPLETE]
1. Fire

Title: Dirge

Pairing: I'm not sure, Cloud and someone, probably Riku. (I can thank Page of Cups for

getting me into that pairing.)

Rating: M

Warnings: Yaoi in later chapters, and violence, and bad language.

Music: 30 Seconds to Mars- Beautiful Lie

Prompt: Sin

A/N: This is going to be kind of a test for me, I'm going to try to see if I can write and stick with a fic over 10 chapters long, and see if I can hold off writing the lemon until it would seem natural for me to write one. I tend to get really impatient and write the lemon to a story before the actual story, and then I get impatient to stick it in, and it all comes way to fast. So this story will be a practice in self-control. It is a prompt story, but it went in kind of a weird direction (as most of my stories do.) I think it has something to do with me never planning anything I write. I just start writing. Well, anyways, I like this story so far, and it takes place in an imaginary world for me. So don't try and compare it to anything you know, like a combination of FF or other worlds or whatever. You'll hurt yourself thinking about it. It is just a new, imaginary world ok? Good. Anyways, I'll update soon if I don't die, I have pneumonia and I feel like shit. Thank you.

**Dirge: Chapter 1**

**Fire**

All humans sin in one way or another, it's unavoidable. They kill, they lie, they lust. Greed and envy are the trademarks of human existence, and yet still they preach what is wrong and what isn't, they hold some sins to be more wrong than others. A liar is not as bad as a murderer, an adulterer not as bad as a rapist. Some sins are acceptable, while others are taboo. One "major" sin can ruin a man's life and mark him as an outcast. As less than human.

It hardly seems fair, but it happens, and as Cloud Strife was well aware, it can happen to the best of people.

His last name seemed to bring him exactly what it was, strife. His life was hard from the beginning, he couldn't remember a day when he hadn't had some sort of struggle, some sort of grief, and now he was 23, sitting on the rusted metal fire escape on the backside of a run-down apartment complex on the outside of the city. A cigarette hung limply from his lips, the smoke curling up around his spiked, greasy, blonde hair. The thin white tendrils were reflected in his cold, hard, cobalt blue eyes. He would have been handsome, with soft rounded features and a beautiful complexion, but his last name had cursed him, leaving his skin leathery and dirty, with greasy sun-bleached hair and all the baby-fat stripped from his body. He was corded, but not overtly so, the muscles were necessary for a life on the streets. He lived hard and loved no one but himself; it was the way things worked, and the only way to stay alive.

Only a block away was another boy much like Cloud. He too had seen what life could do to a man, had seen the worst of it all. His brown eyes reflected a knowledge unbefitting his age, as well as an immeasurable sadness. His name was Squall Leonheart, a 20 year-old failure who'd been betrayed and dumped, like some stray dog. Like Cloud, he could have been handsome, a real lady-killer, but life had hit him hard, and left him a mess in society's eyes.

So now they worked together, living in a sort of gang in the back streets on the outside of a large city. They, along with a few other boys, lived off what they could as scavengers. They lived where no one would notice and worked together to try and keep what remained of their humanity.

Axel, one of the other boys that lived and worked in Cloud's "gang" walked silently down one of the many back-alleyways that marred the outside. He came to a silent stop nearly a foot away from Squall and leaned against the wall, looking up at the starry night above them. From somewhere in the distance a cat yowled.

"Is everything going alright?" Squall inquired. He tilted his head to the side to get a better look at Axel. The red-haired 19-year old looked tired and run down, like they all did.

"Everything's fine, for now, but we better hurry up if this is all going to go according to plan."

"We'll be alright." Squall assured him. Silently he pulled out the Gunblade that was his trademark and started down the grassy slope toward one of the many waterways that ran through the city. Axel steadied his breathing and followed, nervousness coursing through his veins.

Cloud flicked away his cigarette as he saw Squall and Axel start down the hill on the far bank. He stood up slowly, brushing off his tight leather pants as he did so. Without a word he reached around behind him and picked up a sword that was bigger than him, and walked off down the slope toward his colleagues.

The wind picked up, making the salty-smell of the water come to Cloud's nose. He knew the smell well, he lived off the banks of the waterways, and the smell created a tint of nostalgia for the blonde.

Pushing all sentimental thoughts away, Cloud angled his way over to Squall, showing recognition only by nodding. The brunette did the same, and following suit so did Axel, though it was obvious the redhead wanted to say something.

"What is it?" Cloud finally growled at the dancing 19-year old. Axel jumped at the tone in his voice before shifting his weight nervously.

"I…was just thinking Cloud, you know, um…this isn't going to get a little….uh…messy is it? I mean, Squall has his gun thing, and you have your sword and all…are you expecting a fight?"

Cloud grunted in response and hefted his sword over his shoulder. "Axel, think, if a merchant sees three guys with big weapons is he likely to fight back? I don't think so. These are for show mostly, we'll only use them if necessary."

"Always the softy." Squall smirked. "If Zack hadn't died you'd be begging him to let you attack something."

Cloud growled at Squall in warning. "Leave Zack out of this, he's dead, that's all there is to it. I'm just trying to avoid destroying innocent lives alright?"

"Innocent lives? Innocent lives? In case you've forgotten Cloud those innocent lives are the people that sentenced us out here to this God-forsaken territory. Those innocent lives are the people that turned us into this." At his last words Squall gestured widely, as if to encompass the other two ragged people and himself. "They deserve to be cut down."

"No one deserves to be cut down." Cloud argued. "Now shut up, we're almost there." Squall simply rolled his eyes in response and followed.

At the bottom of the hill, near the edge of the waterway, was a merchant-house, one of the many stopping points along the waterways where merchants could "safely" spend the night. They were designed to keep the soft-skinned inner-city folk from getting too cold at night. And they were perfect targets for bandits and gangs. Smart merchants hired guards to watch their goods, but every once in a while there would be a foolish merchant without them, as was the case that night.

Cloud Squall and Axel stopped a good 50 feet from the merchant-house and examined the outside. As Sora, their scout, had promised, there were no guards.

A warm electric light leaked out from the windows, and laughter could be heard from within. The merchant was talking with his family or workers and having a good time, completely oblivious to the three men skulking around outside. That was good, Cloud thought. As long as they stayed inside no one would get hurt.

Silently Squall Cloud and Axel made their way onto the boat. It was small, meaning the merchant wasn't very wealthy. 'This must be their first time to a big city' Cloud mused. He was almost beginning to feel guilty about taking their goods. Almost.

Everything was going fine. Squall had grabbed as much foodstuffs as he could fit into his bag, and Cloud had picked up as much as he could in electronic parts, his skilled eye automatically picking out the most costly items. They would fetch a pretty penny on the black market.

Axel was stooped in front of the safe, his long fingers diligently fiddling with the combination lock. After a few minutes of not getting in, he grew impatient and snapped his fingers together, using the friction to generate heat. After a few seconds a small flame appeared on the edge of his fingertips. At his mental urgings it grew in size until it was the same color and size of a small blowtorch. Confident now, Axel began to slowly tear into the safe with the flame.

Cloud was just about ready to leave when a faint glow caught his eye. He turned, hoping to find a firefly, but was surprised to see Axel working on the safe with fire. It was obvious the boy didn't see the barrels of gunpowder staked up next to the safe.

"Axel you idiot! Get out of there!" Cloud dropped his carefully collected supply of parts and his sword and bounded over toward Axel, but before he could go anywhere a tall thin man stepped out of the main cabin, right next to Axel.

"What the hell is going on out here?" The man roared. Startled, Axel jumped back. His makeshift blowtorch catching some of the packaging around the crates on fire. The whole thing went up like a powder keg. Before Cloud could yell, before the man could run, and before Axel could react, the flames engulfed the barrels of gunpowder, and an explosion far larger than any Cloud had ever seen before blasted off the whole front of the boat.

Cloud was sent flying onto the shore. He couldn't see what had happened to Axel, but he knew the teenager must have died. No one could have survived that explosion. Flaming debris was falling around him, and Cloud was dimly aware of a deep searing pain coming from the vicinity of his leg.

"CLOUD! AXEL! WHERE ARE YOU?" Squall's voice cut through the sound of the burning boat and rang in Cloud's ears. Desperately he tried to yell back, but his head was spinning, and he couldn't think straight.

Cloud couldn't see, his vision was blurring and the pain in his leg was getting worse. All he knew was that he was in pain again. He hated pain, he had had enough of it, and now it was back.

His last thought before he passed out was a faint hope that Axel hadn't felt anything when he had died.

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Axel dies, poor guy. I know, we all love him. But what can I say? I just suddenly felt like making him die. Oh well…in any event I hope you like this story so far; I'm really trying to make it sound good! Thank you for reading it!

R&R!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! For Axel's sake!


	2. Aqua and Silver

-1**Title**: Dirge

**Pairing**: I'm not sure, Cloud and someone, probably Riku. (I can thank Page of Cups for

getting me into that pairing.)

**Rating**: M

**Warnings**: Yaoi in later chapters, and violence, and bad language.

**Music: **AFI - The Boy Who Destroyed the World

**Prompt**: Sin

_**Dirge: Chapter 2 **_

_**Aqua and Silver**_

Waking up hurt more than passing out did. Cautiously Cloud rolled over onto his side, wincing when a sore muscle in his back panged. He had to stop a moment after that and let his breath come back. His throat was raw, as if he'd been gulping in hot air. The pain in his leg was immense.

A foot slamming into his injured side knocked him over. With a grunt Cloud glanced up to get a look at his attacker. He couldn't see anyone though, it was too dark.

When the kick came again Cloud tried to roll out of the way, but he ended up landing on his arm at a weird angle, causing him to scream in pain. Whoever had been attacking him stopped at this, and Cloud was dimly aware of someone bending over him.

"Who the fuck…are you?" Cloud heaved. Talking was hard with the condition his throat was in, and his voice came out in thick heaving gasps.

"I should ask you the same thing asshole. You killed my father."

"I didn't-" Cloud's reply was cut off as another vicious kick was delivered to his ribs.

"Shut up! You and your little entourage were the jackasses that blew up our boat. My dad was on there, you killed him."

"We didn't mean to…he…startled us…I lost…my friend…"

"Who gives a fuck about your friend? You asses are just a bunch of jackals. Your friend deserved to die! My father didn't!"

Cloud's free hand shot out of it's own accord to grab onto whoever was yelling at him. When his hand connected to flesh he clutched it tightly and used the remainder of his strength to pull the person down to his eyelevel. Icy blue eyes met aqua as the silver-haired boy was forced to look at him. "Axel didn't deserve to die. He was only 19 dammit. We're only trying to get by, just like you. So shut the fuck up kid."

The boy glared right back and wrenched Cloud's hand from his arm. "Any asshole who steals from others deserves what happens to them."

"Do you think we have a choice? Dammit kid, wait until you have to live out here! You'll see, you wouldn't survive. You inner-city folk are all the same. You think that we're scum because we live out here and fight for every scrap of food. But your kind is responsible for dumping us here, like human trash. You wouldn't survive a day out here."

"Well I'll have to now. When my dad was killed the workers ran off. There's no one left and my papers burned up in the fire. I'm as much "human trash" now as you are."

Cloud let a bark of a laugh escape his lips despite the pain it brought. "So you're left out here? God kid, you really made a mistake."

The silver-haired boy let out a low growl and kicked Cloud again, making him grunt in pain. "Don't laugh at me asshole. It's your fault I'm stuck out here!"

"Alright, so it's my fault you're out here. Ya know what? No one gives a shit. And you won't last out here unless you find someone to look after you. And by beating the crap out of me, you're making an enemy out of half the population this side of the North waterway."

Cloud heard the wind whistling off the boy's foot before it connected with his ear. Lights exploded behind the lids of his eyes as the toe of the boy's foot connected to his head.

"Shit!" Cloud yelled. Blood was freely trickling down his head and into his mouth and eyes.

"Cloud?" Squall's voice drifted over the grass to where the angry boy and Cloud's limp form rested. Cloud couldn't hear him, his eardrum had burst on the boy's last attack, leaving him dazed and half-deaf. The boy heard though, and took off running in the opposite direction.

Squall made his way over to Cloud's battered form. He could just barely make out his outline in the darkness. By the time he got over to his blonde friend the silver-haired boy was gone.

"Cloud! What the hell happened to you??" Gingerly Squall rolled his friend over onto his back. Blood was all over the place with dirt sticking to it in clumps.

"Swthall?" Cloud murmured. His words were slurred and low. Squall could tell he was fighting to stay conscious.

"It's ok Cloud….don't say anything, try to stay awake. I'll get you back to the others. Don't fall asleep now…" As he spoke Squall began ripping up his shirt, using the dirty pieces to try and bandage up the largest wounds. Cloud looked bad, and if the amount of blood was any clue, he could possibly die.

After bandaging his friend up as best he could, Squall gently lifted Cloud off the ground and onto his shoulders. Cloud's only response was a muffled groan. Squall started off up the hill, back in the direction he had first come from. Standing at the top of the hill was a brown-haired boy, about 15 years old. He looked anxious and was waving to Squall to hurry up.

Squall trudged up the hill, stopping only when he got to the top to say something to the boy. Then he gently moved Cloud to a more comfortable position on his shoulders, and trotted off down the alleyways to the heart of the outer-city.

Two aqua eyes watched it all through some bushes no more than 15 feet away.

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Riku's pretty violent isn't he? Oh well. Poor Cloud though, he's getting beat up quite a bit. But he'll survive for now. He has to, he's the protagonist.

R&R!


	3. Pain

-1**Title**: Dirge

**Pairing**: I'm not sure, Cloud and someone, probably Riku. (I can thank Page of Cups for

getting me into that pairing.)

**Rating**: M

**Warnings**: Yaoi in later chapters, and violence, and bad language.

**Music: **HIM - Right Here In My Arms

**Prompt**: Sin

_**Dirge: Chapter 3 **_

_**Pain**_

"Cloud? Cloud, wake up! Come on…you wouldn't die this easily. You're stronger than this…"

Cloud began to wake up slowly. His head was swimming. Pictures of Axel's surprised face as the flames engulfed him, images of the silver-haired boy's piercing eyes, memories of Zack's smiling face, they were all drifting through his mind. As if the cabinet that contained all his memories had busted open, letting them all fly free.

A gentle nudge finally brought him out of his daze. He looked up to see a young blonde-haired face above his own. It was Roxas, Sora's brother.

"Hey Leon! He's up!" Dimly Cloud heard the thump of Squall's footsteps as he approached Cloud's bed.

"Cloud? You ok?"

"I feel like I got trampled by an elephant carrying a ton of bricks on its back, but other than that I'm fine." Cloud could feel the dried blood on his lips and face crack as he spoke.

"Man, you're a mess." Roxas commented. "What happened to you?"

"I'd like to ask the same question." Squall added. "When I found you it looked like someone beat the crap out of you. But there was no one around."

Gingerly Cloud tried to sit up. It took some effort, but he was able to get into a complete sitting position without too much pain. _'I'm going to be sore for weeks'_ he thought. Glancing up, he noticed Squall and Roxas staring at him expectantly.

"Well I…" Cloud's voice trailed off. He wasn't sure he wanted to tell them he got beat up by a kid. He also didn't want to have a man-hunt on his hands. He just wanted to forget the whole incident. "I just got beat up from the explosion." he finished lamely.

Squall raised an eyebrow, disbelief on his face. "If you say so." he responded.

"What about Axel? Did he…?" Roxas's crestfallen look at his query made everything clear to Cloud. Axel hadn't survived the explosion.

"There wasn't even a body. He was completely incinerated." Squall replied. "What happened anyways? I heard you yell, ands then everything just blew up."

"He was torching the safe, the fire caught on some gunpowder barrels." Cloud responded. "I tried to warn him…but…"

"It's not your fault Cloud. It was an accident. It happens."

Cloud shook his head lightly. "It happens too much. How are any of us supposed to live long enough to get inside the walls out here? It's a miracle we've lasted this long."

"Cloud don't talk like that. It was an accident alright?"

"Yeah, now. But between all the accidents and the murders and disease, all a man is guaranteed out here is an early death."

"Cloud…"

"No, I'm sick of it. There's too much pain, too much death out here. I say we have the whole town charge the gates and get slaughtered, that way everyone can just die and there won't be any more people to be miserable."

"That won't change anything Cloud. There will always be pain, always be suffering. Making it come sooner is just-"

"Just what? Stupid? Suicidal? Pathetic? I don't give a shit, Squall. I'm sick of all of this. I'm sick of the outside, sick of the fags on the inside, and sick of watching kids die trying to survive. I'm sick of it all. Now give me a cigarette."

Squall gave Cloud a disapproving stare, but handed the box of second-rate cigs to him anyways. "Smoking is bad for your health." he commented, trying to lighten the mood.

"Yeah? And so is your nagging. Jeez Squall you sound like my wife."

"You don't have a wife."

"Well if I did, she'd sound like you. In fact, since the position's open, would you marry me?"

"Very funny Cloud."

"I was serious."

Roxas giggled at their exchange. They always acted stupid like that to try and lighten the mood when things began to get a little too stressful or depressing. As Zack used to say, "laughter makes everything look just a little better."

"Something funny squirt? Get yer butt over here and I'll give you something to giggle about."

Roxas scampered just out of Cloud's range and stuck his tongue out, taunting the older man.

"Squall? Would you be a dear and whip his ass for me? Thank you."

Squall glanced over at Roxas and gave him a sly grin. "You heard him Roxas, ready to get your ass kicked?"

"If you can catch me!" Roxas stuck his tongue out at Squall and bounded off, the older male trailing in his wake. With Cloud finally alone, he found his mind trailing back to thoughts about the silver-haired kid. Part of him hoped the kid was ok, and part of him hoped that he had gotten caught by wild dogs and torn to bits.

"Well…whatever the case, at least he didn't kill me. Though I'm not sure if it would have been so bad if he had. Hell can't be worse than here." Cloud said aloud solemnly. Taking the pack of cigarettes in his hand, he pulled one out and lit it. The smoke curled up around his face, causing the dull light waving in through the dirty window to cast ghostly shadows on his face.

As Cloud began to take drag after drag on his cigarette he felt himself calm down. His last thought before drifting back into unconsciousness was '_I hope that kid is makes it ok.'_

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_Hehe, I wrote 3 chapters in one sitting. I'm tired._


	4. An Expensive Orange

-1**Title**: Dirge

**Pairing**: I'm not sure, Cloud and someone, probably Riku. (I can thank Page of Cups for

getting me into that pairing.)

**Rating**: M

**Warnings**: Yaoi in later chapters, and violence, and bad language.

**Music: **Nine Days- Story of a Girl

**Prompt**: Sin

_**Dirge: Chapter 4 **_

_**An expensive orange**_

It was nearly 2 weeks after the boat incident before Cloud saw the silver-haired kid again. Cloud was walking down the street, his right hand hovering protectively over the heavy leather coin-purse tied to his belt. Thieves were common on the outside of town, heck Cloud was one, and he wasn't about to lose his money to a pickpocket.

He was walking down the street nearly a mile from the inner-city gates when he spotted a flash of silver in the sunlight. Curious, he poked his nose around the corner of one of the many alleys to see what was going on.

The silver-haired kid that had attacked him not too long ago was struggling against an older man. The attacker was about 6 feet tall with dirty matted hair and a glare that could kill. Cloud recognized him immediately. He ran the local whore-house.

"Let me go!" The kid yelled. The man only chuckled.

"Calm down kid. I'm not going to hurt you. I only want to offer you a job."

"I don't need a job! I'm doing fine on my own!" A fire flickered in the boy's eyes. They were strong eyes, full of determination and youth. It was a fire Cloud hadn't seen in a long time.

"Fine on your own eh? Doing what? Stealing?" The man grabbed the boy's wrist and squeezed it until the hand came open. A withered orange fell out of his hand and rolled across the ground. The boy's eyes shone with fear as the fruit rolled away.

"Let me go! Damn you!"

The orange the boy had dropped continued to roll across the ground before coming to a stop at Cloud's feet. Tenderly he picked it up and rolled it over his fingers. It wasn't much, pretty crappy in the way of food. But it was food nonetheless. And fruit. They boy had to have robbed a fairly rich person to get his hands on fruit.

"Drop him Ansem." Cloud growled, stepping out of the shadows as he did so. "He's no use for the House, too young."

Ansem looked up, his eyes sparkling at Cloud's voice. "Cloud? Is that you? Why, I haven't seen you since you were in the House. How are you doing?"

"Shut the hell up you piece of shit. Let the boy go."

"Now now Cloud, that's no way to treat an old friend. Besides, he's my catch. I'm entitled to my share of the profits."

"You're exploiting young children for your own perverted pleasures and for monetary gain. So shut up and let him go before I beat the crap out of you."

"Now Cloud, you wouldn't do that. I have too much influence around here for you to make an enemy out of me."

Cloud hesitated a moment. Ansem was right, he held more influence in the town then Cloud himself did. If it came to a conflict, Ansem would have more support. Glancing over at the boy, Cloud made a snap decision.

"I'll buy him off you then. How much?"

Ansem chuckled. "More than you can afford Cloud. More than you can afford. I think this boy will fetch me a pretty penny. He is quite a specimen. What with his beautiful silver hair and all."

"Don't treat me as if I'm some kind of fucking dog." The boy growled. Cloud jumped at his voice, it seemed to have more bite in it than he remembered.

"30 gold." Cloud offered, ignoring the silver-haired boy's evil glare.

"300" Ansem countered.

"You're insane! He couldn't make you 300 gold if he worked for 10 years!"

"I suppose you're right Cloud, but my price is 300, no more, no less. He's too handsome a bargaining chip to throw away so easily."

"Now listen here Ansem, my boy's are regulars at your place. Imagine I should force them to boy-cot you for the next year or so? You aren't the only House on the outskirts. I'm sure we can make business pretty bad for you…"

"Is that a threat?" Ansem growled.

"If you see it that way. 100 upfront. It's more than he's worth."

Cloud had to look away from the killing glare the boy was throwing at him.

"Fine. 100, but I want it now." Ansem replied as he held out his greasy hand. Cloud sighed and reached into his coin purse for the money. By the time he was done it was nearly empty.

Ansem let go of the boy roughly and trotted off down the alley, taking a wide route around Cloud. "Thank you kindly Cloud. Enjoy your little pet."

Cloud looked back in time to see the boy take off running down the alley. Cloud smiled and followed him slowly, watching as he bolted around various corners in an attempt to lose the older man. Eventually though the boy ran into a dead end, and turned around to find Cloud standing at the mouth of the alley, a smug smirk on his face.

"A fine mess you got me in. You cost me my cigarettes for the next month and food for the next week. Not to mention the money we needed to repair my sword and Squall's Gunblade. The guys are going to kill me when I get back."

"Oh boo hoo, like I give a shit. Leave me alone you ass, I never asked you to help me."

"Maybe not, but I do own you now, and the law says that I can do whatever I want with you."

"What law?"

Cloud smiled. "My law. And if you don't follow it, I can have you killed in the blink of an eye. After all, wasn't it you who beat the crap out of me and left me to die? You know I still can't hear right out of my right ear."

"I'm not going with you."

"If you don't you'll be picked up by another person like Ansem. You'll be thrown into a House full of other boys your age and be forced to sell yourselves to guys and girls alike until you get too old or too sick to be beneficial. Is that what you want?"

"And if I go with you?"

"I haven't decided yet, if you get on my good side though, I may help you survive and put a roof over your head, so long as you work."

"What kind of work?" The boy asked suspiciously.

Cloud smiled. "Well, I guess you'll see when we get there won't you? Don't worry though, I'm not a sick pervert like Ansem, I don't exploit little boys for money."

"I'm not a little boy."

"Right, how old are you? 14? 15?"

"16." the boy responded. "I'm 16, and my name isn't 'you' it's Riku."

Cloud smiled. This Riku reminded him of himself when he was younger, cocky, smart, defiant. He reeked of the inner-city softness, but was determined to survive on the outside.

"Well Riku. If you want to eat I suggest following me. I'm not going to make you, but if you think about it I think you'll agree my offer is the best you're going to get. In other words, come with me if you want to live." (I've always wanted to say that )

Cloud simply walked off, leaving Riku to ponder over what to do. After a minute's hesitation, he followed, making sure to keep his distance from Cloud. '_Well' _he reasoned. '_He can't be any worse than that Ansem guy.'_

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It's 12:00 and I'm tired. Goodnight.

R&R


	5. Nice Pet

-1**Title**: Dirge

**Pairing**: CloudXRiku!

**Rating**: M

**Warnings**: Yaoi in later chapters, and violence, and bad language.

**Music: **Tatu - Malchik Gei

**Prompt**: Sin

_**Dirge: Chapter 4 **_

_**Nice Pet**_

Riku followed Cloud for nearly an hour. He walked around to various street vendors to talk. During the periods of time when he was chatting, bartering, or doing whatever it was he was doing, Riku would hide out nearby, careful to keep himself concealed lest he draw too much attention to himself. If there was one thing he knew how to do, it was hide. His parents had always taught him how to blend in. "It is one of the most useful tools of the trade for a merchant." they used to say.

"Some merchant I've turned out to be." He found himself muttering.

Cloud finally left the stall of the last vendor on his little tour and angled back into the alleys. Riku had trouble keeping up at first, Cloud took too many twists and turns, but eventually he managed to tail him fairly well.

Riku expected Cloud to walk into one of the better-built structures along their way, but was surprised to see him duck into a broken-down building covered by a blanket. Trash was littered all outside the entrance and the walls were beginning to crack. Any paint that had once covered the structure had long since been peeled off.

He hesitated a moment. Riku was not entirely sure he could trust the big blonde-haired man. After all, it was Cloud's fault that his father was dead and he was stuck in this situation. But then again, he had paid for Riku's freedom.

After conflicting with himself for a few moments, Riku ducked under the blanket and looked around inside.

The inside wasn't much better than the outside. The floor was made of dirt, without even a rug to cover it. The only furnishings in the first room was some sort of busted-up electronic thing and several boxes full of parts. A strange smell wafted up from a few of the boxes, and Riku was afraid to look in them.

Something wet and heavy slammed into the side of Riku's head, making him jump. It hadn't hurt, but it had scared him. When he put a hand to his head, he felt it tighten over a wet cloth.

Cloud stood in a doorway a few feet away. He smiled at Riku with a cocky little grin and nodded to the machine parts. "You're a merchant's brat right? I know you know how to check for working parts and how to clean them. Get busy; I want these boxes done before nightfall."

Riku's eyes widened as he looked back at the huge, stinking pile of boxes. "You want me, to clean and inspect _those?_ You've got to be shitting me."

"Hey, watch your language around here, there are kids. I don't need them being exposed to your mouth. Squall is bad enough."

"I'm bad enough what?" Squall ducked under the blanket into the room behind Riku, startling the youth. "Who's the kid?" he asked suspiciously.

"An Innie. I found him wandering the streets. Rescued him from Ansem."

"Oh great, how much did he cost?"

Cloud hesitated a moment, unable to look Squall in the eyes. "Squall look, I can make up the money ok?"

"How much?"

"….100 gold." 

"100?!? Damn, Cloud! You burn money faster than Sora does!"

Cloud winced and looked away, shame apparent on his face. He was about to say something back to Squall, but Riku interrupted with his own comment. "I'll replace the money. Cloud helped me; I might as well show some gratitude."

"Right, gratitude. And meanwhile, while you're working to pay off the 100 gold, we have yet another mouth to feed."

"Oh stop your complaining Squall. We don't have to feed Axel anymore, and that means we have a spot open."

"Yeah, but Axel didn't eat much. This guy's an Innie, he's used to big meals."

Cloud glared up at Squall, his face seemingly set in stone. "Not all Innies have it as well off as you think Squall. Don't forget I-"

"Cloud? Are you back?"

Cloud paused to look around the room. Riku followed his gaze over to one of the hallways leading into the room. There stood a brown-haired boy, 15 years old. It was the boy Riku had seen on the top of the hill the night of the accident.

"Sora, I haven't seen you in a while, where did you run off to lately?"

"The House on the East side, I was visiting uh…well you know." A light blush spread across the boy's face, and Riku found himself wondering what they were talking about.

"Yeah well, keep your money Sora; it's going to be a little tight around here for a while. I bought a kid." At the last statement, Cloud jerked his head in Riku's direction.

"Really? Can he train with us?" Sora didn't sound the least bit surprised about the "buying a kid" part of the conversation. Riku imagined that in the uncivilized outside that such things were fairly common.

"He can train." Squall piped up, "but only if he finishes his work. Now leave him alone Sora and go find your brother. I'll meet you out back in 10 minutes."

"Okay!" Sora cheered. He immediately turned around and bounced off down the hall.

"He can stay Cloud, but only if he earns his keep. Otherwise I'll turn around and sell him right back to Ansem. Got it? He's your pet, make sure you walk him." And with that, Squall turned around and left the way he came.

Now it was only Cloud and Riku in the room. The silver-haired youth watched the older male carefully, trying to read his face for any sort of emotion. He found none.

"So I'm some kind of pet?" Riku finally asked.

"I guess…" Cloud sighed and leaned against the wall. "I was hoping Squall would take it a little better."

"I thought you were the ring leader of this little "gang". Why do you answer to that guy?"

"I don't answer to him, and he doesn't answer to me. This isn't a gang Riku, it's a family, or at least as close to one as we can get out here."

Riku snorted and turned away, heading over to the pile of work he was supposed to be doing. "Family, right."

"You still don't think very highly of us do you?" Cloud asked.

"No I don't, I still see you as a bunch of savages." Riku replied as he picked up the first piece of equipment. After examining it closely, he set it down in a separate pile.

"Savages. Is that what everyone views us as? Funny, considering we all came from the inner-city a long time ago."

"Yeah, as criminals. Not one person is out here that doesn't deserve to be."

Cloud managed a weak, wry smile before turning away to leave Riku to his work. "Funny," he said as he walked away. "Because you're stuck out here."

The rag that Riku had been moving over one of the parts slowly came to a stop. H didn't reply, only stared at the piece of machinery. _'He's right. I am out here. And I didn't do anything.'_ Tears began to fight their way into the corners of Riku's eyes.

'_I want to go home.'_

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I never can give up. Here is another chapter.

R&R


	6. Death Song

-1**Title**: Dirge

**Pairing**: Riku and Cloud

**Rating**: M

**Warnings**: Yaoi in later chapters, and violence, and bad language.

**Music: **HIM - Razorblade Kiss

**Prompt**: Sin

_**Dirge: Chapter 6**_

_**Death Song**_

The next few days were indistinguishable from the each other. One day lapsed into the other and Riku found himself wondering if he was with the same people who had killed his father and burned his boat. Cloud was always out, going to God knows where, and leaving Riku back at the house, if one could call it a house. It was more of a broken down structure they happened to live in.

During the times that Cloud was gone Riku was given menial chores to do, like clean Cloud's sword or sort through various things and estimate their value. It seemed that, as soon as finished one chore, another one presented itself to him.

During his stay Riku slowly became acquainted with the other members of the gang. Squall hated his guts, he was constantly finding fault in everything Riku did. It annoyed the silver-haired youth to no end, but he put up with it only because Cloud would have his hide if he didn't.

Sora was a year younger than Riku with spiky, bouncy, brown hair and a cheerful disposition. He wasn't the least bit shy, and Riku found himself spending more and more of his free time with the boy, either talking or, as was usually the case, sparring.

Sparring was something Riku would never get tired of. Sora had found an old rusty bar for Riku to use as a weapon and was constantly nagging at him to play. The sessions were rough, and both boys usually came out with more bruises than when they went in. One day, when Riku questioned Sora as to why he sparred so much, the boy only shook his head and replied, "training."

Roxas was Sora's brother, and looked exactly like him except for his lighter hair color. Part of the difference was genetic, and part was from being sun-bleached. Roxas spent more time outside then Riku believed was healthy, and he would often come home with sunburns all over his body. When Riku would ask where he had gone to get such burns, Roxas would only shake his head and reply "Training." Just like his brother. Neither of the boys would tell Riku any more than that, leaving the silver-haired boy to ponder it on his own.

There were other people in the gang besides Cloud's immediate "family" but none of them were as close. They would come occasionally to Cloud's place to talk or spend the night. Often times money or goods would exchange hands, but they would always leave in a day or two. There was no warmth between these people and Cloud. They were distant, nearly strangers. The stark difference between them and the people Riku knew made Cloud's words about family resonate in Riku's thoughts, and soon the boy was convinced they were true.

It was on the 8th day of Riku's stay when his whole perspective of the outside world and Cloud's gang did a complete 180. Riku woke up in the morning and got out of his make-shift blanket bed in Cloud's room to do his daily chores when he noticed that Cloud and Squall were still in bed. (Cloud and Squall had to share a bed since there was a shortage of blankets.) Worried that something was wrong, Riku walked over and poked Cloud in the side until he woke up.

"Mmmm…what is it Riku?" Cloud opened his eyes sleepily and yawned. His soft blonde hair flopped down over his eyes, partially obscuring the blue orbs from Riku's vision.

"Is something wrong? You and the gorilla are usually up by now."

Cloud merely yawned and waved Riku off with a flick of his wrist. "Go back to bed Riku, today's Dirge, no one works on Dirge."

"Dirge?" Riku asked. "What's Dirge?"

"You'll see." Cloud replied. "Now go back to bed." With that, he pulled the covers back over himself and hid under them so that only part of his hair was peeking out.

Grudgingly Riku obeyed, though he wanted to know more. This was the first time he had heard of outsiders having a holiday. But then again, he didn't know much about the outsiders. He'd only been stranded on the outside for 3 weeks, which, according to Squall, was a long time for an "Innie", a person from the inside.

Questions fluttered through Riku's mind like butterflies. He found he couldn't sleep, and finally he got up, intent on doing _something_. Finding nothing to do though, Riku dedicated his time to exploring the rest of the house. Though he had lived there for a week, he still hadn't seen the whole place.

Quietly, so as not to disturb the two slumbering men, Riku crawled out of his bed and moved out of the room. Cloud's bedroom was connected to the entrance room, the room Riku spent the most time in. Three other rooms branched off from this main room. To the right was Sora and Roxas's shared room, and next to that was a storage room. But on the oposite side was a closed door that Riku had never been allowed to go in.

Riku edged by Sora's room and peeked in. The twins were fast asleep, and Sora was snoring loud enough to cover any noise Riku might accidentally make. Confident that he wouldn't be seen or hears, the silver-haired teen stalked off to the unexplored room and cracked the door open.

The inside was completely empty except for a rusty metal staircase that led up to the roof. Intrigued, Riku made his way over to the staircase and inspected it. It looked pretty rickety, and Riku doubted that it could hold his weight. But, driven by curiosity, he found himself climbing the stairs before he could really think about it. They held, and Riku made his way up the stairs to the top of the roof.

The sky outside was overcast, it looked dark and bleak, as if the sky itself were mourning. It fit Riku's mood perfectly. Ever since he had been stuck on the outside he'd been miserable. The only time he wasn't was in the brief moments when he'd spar with Sora, or when he was asleep. Other than those precious few moments though, Riku felt as lost and alone as was possible for a boy his age.

As Riku stared up at the sky his ears began to catch a low, haunting melody. At first what he was searing didn't register, it was unlike anything he had ever heard before, but the longer he listened the more he could make out of it. Within a few moments he was able to hear whole words.

(Don't try to think of some logical translation for the following text, because there is none. I'll write it in Latin as soon as I learn Latin so…yeah. Don't try to even pronounce it, just imagine ok?)

_Dono mersha e unae. Tienda fersha tresto shaa. Tono berta casae ti. Dono mersha e unea._

_(Long will live the silent dead. Heaven take them in. Move inside the walls at last. Long will live the silent dead.)_

Riku sat down on top of the roof and looked out over the other buildings. He couldn't tell where the song was coming from, but it was gradually picking up volume. Soon it was loud enough to hear clearly. A whole myriad of voices making a low, sad, haunting melody. It sounded like something one would hear at a funeral. It was mesmerizing, and soon Riku felt his eyes closing and his head slowly bobbing with the sound of the music.

"Enjoying yourself?"

The trance was broken at Cloud's voice. Riku jumped, and almost fell flat on his face. Whirling around, he found Cloud peeking up through the hole in the roof, smiling contentedly at Riku.

"What's that music?" Riku asked, calm now that he knew it was Cloud behind him.

"The Dirge." Cloud replied. "It's a song honoring the dead. Once a month we have a day for the dead out here. Though it hardly seems enough. People drop out here like flies. Dirge is the only day we have a month to take a day off from surviving to rest."

"So it's a holiday? A holiday for remembering the dead?" Riku asked.

Cloud shook his head sadly. "Dirge is no holiday. It just happens to be the day that the monks from the church inside the city come to take the bodies of the dead away. They pile them up on a cart and take them inside the gates to a furnace where they are burned to fuel the transport systems inside the city."

A look of pure horror crossed Riku's face as he stared at Cloud in disbelief. "Th-that's horrible! Why don't you do something about that??"

Cloud shrugged, shaking his head yet again. "What can we do? Out here we use what land we have to survive. We don't have room for graveyards. And without some sort of graveyard the bodies would pile up, bringing disease and more filth to the area. Dirge is the one thing that the inner cities do for the outsiders. Other than that, we're screwed."

"You're wrong! They…they don't do stuff like that! It…it's inhuman!"

"They do do it Riku. Many people here dream of dying, just so they can get inside the gates. It was Axel's dream you know. He wanted inside those gates more than anyone I ever knew. But he can't even get there in death, he died on the outside."

"But he did something to get out here. He and everyone else out here did something wrong. That's why they're out here, as punishment!"

Cloud's fist clenched lightly as he pulled himself up through the roof. He walked over to Riku and sat behind him before gently pulling the silver-haired teen back into his lap.

"W-what are you doing?: Riku cried in alarm. He tried to pull away from Cloud, but the older man held him in place and rolled up Riku's sleeve. There, tattooed to his bicep, was a barcode.

"See this?" Cloud asked quietly. Riku looked up at Cloud, then down to his arm. He nodded silently. "This," Cloud continued. "Is proof that you were born an Innie. It's how the government keeps track of the population. I have one too." Cloud rolled up his own sleeve to show the barcode tattooed there. His was similar to Riku's, but there was one major difference. Cloud's had a large black line running through it horizontally. "See that line?" he asked Riku. Riku nodded again. "That shows that I was sentenced out here for life. I was kicked out of the inner city. The color, black, means I was being punished for rape."

"Rape?!?" Riku squeaked. Quickly he tried to scoot away from Cloud, but the older man held him in place with one arm.

"Don't go running away just yet, I haven't finished my story." Cloud said. He cleared his through before continuing. " I was prosecuted falsely. I never raped anyone. The girl I got involved with happened to be the daughter of a big-time merchant. One night, we carried thing a little too far and she became pregnant. She panicked when her father questioned her and blamed me for raping her. Her father became outraged and had me arrested. I never even had a proper trial, he just paid the judge off to sentence me. So I got sentenced out here, without deserving it."

Riku was silently studying his shoes. He couldn't help but notice how much shinier, how much newer his were compared to Cloud's. Cloud's boots were falling apart, small rips and tears lined the sturdy leather and part of the sole was coming loose on the one. In comparison, Riku's shoes looked brand new, with only a little bit of dirt on them and frayed shoelaces.

Taking Riku's silent study of his shoes as an invitation to continue, Cloud began to speak again.

"I'm not the only one to be sentenced out here for crimes I didn't commit. Squall too was charged for murder. He was framed, but no one cared. They just wanted a scapegoat. Meanwhile the real murderer walks around free inside the city walls, with cash in his pocket and new clothes on his back."

"What about Sora and Roxas?" Riku asked, slightly scared to hear the answer. Who could believe those two boys could commit any kind of crime?

"They've never been inside." Cloud responded. "They have no barcodes, the committed no crime other than being born. Because of the high population inside the cities they were taken from their mother at birth and given to the Houses to take care of. When they reached a certain age, the Houses exploited them for money."

Riku gulped. He was already sick to his stomach, he felt like he was going to barf. "So you mean…they were…"

"They were sold for sex. The same thing Ansem was going to do to you if I hadn't bought you off him. Zack, the man that took me into the gang, my predecessor, bought Sora and Roxas off of Ansem, just like I bought you. Only they had already lived in the House for most of their lives."

"….And….And the boy that died on the boat?"

"Axel was born out here. Both of his parents were outsiders. Axel grew up out here learning how to survive on the streets. Zack took him in after his father got killed on a raid. His mother died when he was young from a sexually transmitted disease from working in the House."

Cloud couldn't see from the position he was in, but tears were leaking out of Riku's eyes in streams. He felt sick, as if he were going to throw up. The things Cloud had said to him were hard to swallow, he had always looked on the outsiders as bad people, as criminals who deserved their punishment. Never once had he considered that they might be innocent. Or that they were treated so badly. Truth be told, he had always seen them as less than human.

The melody that he had found so soothing just a few minutes ago took on an ugly appearance. It terrified him, it was an embodiment of evil and death. Once again sickness overtook his stomach and he gagged, trying to keep himself from throwing up.

Cloud's strong arms snaked their way around his stomach, and Riku allowed them to drag him back against Cloud's chest. He curled up there, letting the warmth of Cloud's body and the sound of his heart drown out the surrounding atmosphere. The song slowly dwindled out of his hearing, and the hypnotic beat of Cloud's heart took over, lulling him into a half-sleep filled with nightmares and memories of home. But home didn't look so grand anymore, it was pale, with strange shadows and meanings he hadn't seen before. Riku's memories scared him, and his thoughts kept returning to Cloud and Sora and Roxas and even Squall. It was as if that week with them suddenly meant more than his whole 16 years on the inside.

"Riku…Riku wake up. It's almost noon."

Slowly Riku opened his eyes. They were sticky from tears and dirt and didn't want to open at first, but when they did, he found he was looking at Cloud's shirt.

"Wake up sleepy head. Today may be Dirge, but we still have to eat. I don't know about you, but I'm hungry." Cloud's large warm hand rubbed against Riku's scalp, brushing the silvery hair in a weird direction, causing it to fall into the teen's eyes.

"I'm up…" Riku mumbled. He didn't really feel like eating, but Cloud insisted they get up, so he did. He followed the older man as if he were on auto-pilot for the rest of the day. When he finally went to bed, he fell asleep immediately and slept silently, without any dreams.

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I finally wrote the background chapter. Well there you go, you know why it's called Dirge, you know the characters' pasts, and you get to see the beginning of a beautiful relationship. And the angst, don't forget the angst!

R&R!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!


	7. Pregnant?

-1**Title**: Dirge

**Pairing**: CloudXRiku!

**Rating**: M

**Warnings**: Yaoi in later chapters, and violence, and bad language.

**Music: **HYDE (Need I say more?)

**Prompt**: Sin

_**Dirge: Chapter 7**_

_**Pregnant?!?!?**_

Riku awoke early the day after Dirge. Cloud and Squall were already gone, making the bedroom seem bigger and emptier than ever. Riku's bed was warm, but it didn't keep out the cold that seemed to emanate from the room. For the first time, Riku began to see his surroundings through an outsider's eyes.

Sora's brow head peeked into the room suddenly, startling Riku.

"Hey Riku! Get up! Cloud told me to give you something!" Sora's words didn't register at first, and Riku just sat there staring at him stupidly.

"Eh?" he asked. Sora just rolled his eyes and walked in. He grabbed Riku's arm and pulled him up, then began to proceeded to drag him from the room.

"Hey wait!" Riku finally said. "I have chores to do!"

"No ya don't." Sora replied. "You've been promoted. Besides, Cloud's sword doesn't need to be cleaned _every_ day. You get to spend the day with me today!"

"More sparring?" Riku asked apprehensively. He didn't feel like sparring, it was too early in the morning. Besides, after what Cloud's speech yesterday, Riku didn't think he could ever be able to hit Sora again, even in fun.

"No, not sparring. I wanna take you to meet someone. But first…" Sora's voice trailed off as he drug Riku into the storage room and began to rummage through some of the boxes. After looking for a few minutes, he pulled out a large, cloth-wrapped package and handed it to Riku. "Cloud wanted you to have this, it was supposed to go to Axel but…well he's not around any more. It used to be Cloud's before he got Zack's sword."

Riku picked up the package and slowly unwrapped the dirty cloth. As he did so, the light caught on a piece of exposed black metal, making the item shine brilliantly. Riku whistled appreciatively as he pulled out a short black sword. The worn leather handle and sheath were full of pock marks and imperfections, but the blade itself was a dazzling black. One long scratched marred the perfect surface of the blade, it ran from the hilt all the way to the tip, if Riku didn't know any better, he'd think the scratch was meant to be there. It was clear that the weapon was made for use, and not for show, but even so, it was beautiful in a deadly sort of way. Elegant even.

"Wow." Riku said in awe. He held it up to the light, admiring the way the light played on the black metal, making it shine a deep purple in spots. It was his first time holding a weapon of any kind.

"Yeah!" Sora beamed. "I wanted it, but when I got my weapon Cloud was still using it."

"It must of cost a lot." Riku remarked.

"No, all our weapons were stolen from merchants on raids. The only one we ever paid for was that huge sword Cloud uses. It was Zack's first weapon."

"So…Cloud is giving this to me?" Riku asked incredulously.

"Yeah, he trusts you now. Now come on, I want you to meet someone, but we'll have to go all the way to the East side."

"The East side?" Riku asked. "But I'm not allowed to go anywhere."

"Well I'll be with you, so it's ok. Besides, now that you have a weapo you're ok. No one will bother you usually. Now let's go!" Sora pushed past Riku and headed toward the room with the stairs.

"Aren't we going outside?" Riku questioned.

"Nah, walking on the ground is too slow. We can make better time up here. Come on!"

Confused, Riku followed. Sora and him climbed up onto the roof and looked around. Riku found he could see over all the other buildings for miles. The only thing obstructing his view was the gargantuan walls of the city to their left.

"Ok….now what?" Riku asked. He was getting tired of asking questions, it made him feel uncomfortable.

"This way!" Sora replied. He walked over to the edge of the building and stepped off. Alarmed, Riku tried to stop him, but then he saw that Sora wasn't falling. Upon closer inspection, he saw a long thin plank of wood connecting a ledge on their building to a ledge on the next. "Coming?" Sora asked. He gave Riku a big smile and jogged across the board to the other house.

Riku was speechless. How had he _missed_ those boards? Seriously. Anyways, he crawled out over the board and followed Sora across, albeit more slowly.

The two boys moved over the building in that fashion for over an hour before they finally reached a dead end. Riku couldn't see a change at all in the scenery, except that now the river was in front of them instead of behind them. On second glance however, he saw that this river had more boats, especially near the entrance to the city itself. The city was still to their left.

"Wow, I didn't know there were so many boats this close to the city."

"That's because this is the East waterway. We live by the North, where only a few poor merchants come through. It's easier to steal from one merchant than a whole brigade of them. You should have seen the last guy we raided. A real stupid man, he had no guards or anything. If he hadn't startled Axel we would have made it out without a scratch."

Riku felt his fist clench, but he didn't say anything to Sora. After all, Cloud hadn't told anyone that it was Riku's boat that had blown up. Sora didn't know.

"Come on! This way! We don't want to get caught up here, Tidus might see us."

"Tidus?"

"Yeah, a real ass. He thinks he's as good as Cloud, made him own little gang of House boys. They suck at fighting, but there are a lot of them. If he catches me on his turf….well lets just say we've had some run-ins in the past." Sora walked over to the edge of the house and looked over. Unlike Cloud's house, this one didn't have any stairs. They'd have to jump down. But the distance wasn't far, and both boy's made it down without a problem.

"How do we get back up?" Riku asked once they were safely on the ground.

"We'll get up through the House when we're ready. I just didn't want to come that way, they'd charge us for admission."

"Admission?"

"Do you know what the House is?"

"Well… not really…kind of…."

"….It's a place where you can pay to uh…have a good time…you know…have sex?"

"It's a whore-house."

"Kind of….now shut up and follow me. I'll take you to meet her."

"Her?"

"Shhh…"

"…" Riku followed Sora silently. They weaved in and out of various alleys until Riku though his head would spin off. "How do you know where you're going?" he asked Sora.

"The Inner city walls, watch them as you move around, they'll keep you oriented. The rest is just from memory, I come here a lot…"

"Sora?"

Riku turned to see a girl scrunched up against some boxes. She had a jar of water in one hand and a rag in the other. It looked like she was washing something.

Sora turned to look at the girl and smiled. He ran over to her and hugged her tightly, then pulled back some to examine her face. He beamed, then kissed her gently. "Kairi…how have you been?"

"Sora….who's he?" The girl, Kairi, nodded over to Riku and then looked back at Sora.

"Kairi, this is Riku. Riku, Kairi is my girlfriend. She's the girl I wanted you to meet."

Riku smiled gently and bowed to Kairi. "Nice to meet you ma'am." He swept his eyes over her form, she looked strange for some reason, lumpy. He clothes didn't fit properly and she looked more heavyset than other girls that Riku had seen.

Kairi blushed at Riku's gesture and looked back to Sora quickly. She stared into his eyes, then looked away again fast. "Um…Sora…do you have the money yet?"

"No, not yet, I just need a little more time, the next raid will be soon, then I'll get paid and…"

"I don't know if it can wait much longer…"

"I'm trying my hardest Kairi…I really am…don't worry, I'll have it in time."

"Um….may I ask what exactly you need money for?" Riku flushed with embarrassment at his query, but he was curious.

Sora paused a moment, then looked at Riku and smiled. "I'm going to get Kairi inside the gate. There is a tattooist on one of the merchant ships who will get her in and help her get on her feet if we can pay him 70 gold. I only need a little more money and I can get her in!"

Riku smiled. "Really?? That's awesome!"

"Yes well…if we don't hurry…it may be too late." Kairi replied, sorrow resonating in her voice.

"Why?"

Sora blushed and looked Riku in the eyes. The teen's determination was evident, shining proudly through the blue orbs. "Because Kairi's pregnant." he replied.

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Oooooooooooooo

I'm tired. I had late classes tonight….Blah…

Anyways, I won't update for a while, I'm taking a trip to New Mexico for a while. So it will be at least a week or so until I can update. But after then, I'm free, no more internet restrictions! Which means I'll be back stronger than ever!

R&R please


	8. Bullet wound

-1

**Title**: Dirge

**Pairing**: CloudXRiku!

**Rating**: M

**Warnings**: Yaoi in later chapters, and violence, and bad language, lots of language.

**Music: **AFI- Death of Seasons

**Prompt**: Sin

_**Dirge: Chapter 7**_

_**Bullet wound**_

"P-Pregnant?!?!?" Riku couldn't help but stammer in disbelief. Kairi looked to be only 14, for her to be pregnant would be scandalous at best. "How??"

Sora gave him a strange look by cocking his head to the side. "What? Don't tell me you've never had the birds and the bees speech. Cuz I'm not going to explain it."

Riku shook his head in exasperation. "No what I mean is, who's the father?"

Both Kairi and Sora blushed at this query and looked away. "Um Riku…Did I tell you why Kairi lives all the way down here? She uh….works in the House."

"Oh…" Riku blushed with embarrassment and tried to look away. Kairi's baby's father could be anyone willing to come to the House. Which would be a lot of people. No wonder Sora was so desperate to get her inside the city. He wanted her in a better life, he _loved _ her.

A small pang of some foreign feeling slipped into Riku's consciousness. He tried to assign a label to it, tried to make sense of it, but for some reason he couldn't put a finger on it. Was it remorse? Guilt? Perhaps it was sympathy. Whatever it was, it began to flood into Riku's being like a wildfire, and it only grew stronger when he chanced a look in Sora and Kairi's direction.

The silence was the only thing that alerted Sora to the sound of footsteps at all. Before either him or Riku could move a boy in his late teens, with sandy blonde hair came from nowhere and slammed his fist into Sora's jaw, sending him sliding across the ground. Riku had his sword out in an instant, the cool smoothly-worn leather comforting in his grip. The weight was not like anything he was used to, but he adjusted quickly as he rushed the boy.

The blonde boy swerved at the last moment, dodging Riku's jab and sending him off balance. The silver-haired teen just barely rolled away before the other boy's foot came down hard where Riku's head had been a second earlier. If that blow had connected, it probably would have killed Riku.

Dimly Riku heard Kairi yelling something, but he ignored her to concentrate on the boy above him who was straddling him and pinning him to the ground. The boy's strong hands had effectively pinned down Riku's sword arm, and he pinched until the Riku was forced to release his weapon.

"Sora," the sandy-haired boy said with contempt. "What the hell are you doing in my territory? And who's this boy? I've never seen him before. He's kind of cute, he might do for the House."

"Shut the hell up Tidus and let him go. He's under Cloud's protection!" Riku saw Sora stand out of the corner of his eyes. From what he could see, there were several other boy's surrounding him, preventing him from any further action.

"Cloud's protection eh? He looks like he might need it. He's pathetic! He doesn't even have hardly any muscles. He looks like a House boy!"

Anger coursed through Riku's veins. "Are you calling me a whore?" Riku growled

The sandy-haired kid, Tidus, as Sora had called him, looked back down at the motionless youth below him. "That's exactly what I'm calling you. What did you have to do? Sleep with Cloud to get into the gang? I wouldn't doubt it. Everyone over there is just a bunch of fags."

Not just anger, but pure rage was flowing thickly through Riku's veins now. Adrenaline was released into the teen's body and he pushed back against Tidus's grip. Slowly he sat up, pushing Tidus back from him. Within a matter of seconds Riku had managed to maneuver out from under Tidus and pick up his sword.

"What the fuck???" Tidus jumped back and examined Riku closely. "Guess you're not just a pretty boy."

"Riku run! Get out of here!" Sora was still surrounded by the other cronies. One of whom had Sora's keyblade weapon in his hand.

Riku ignored his brunette friend and positioned his sword in front of him as he had seen Roxas and Sora pose during their training. It was awkward, their weapons were obviously different both in weight and structure, so Riku adjusted it so it was more comfortable.

Tidus laughed. "Are you going to fight me? Don't be stupid kid, you don't even know how to use that sword of yours!" The sandy-haired teen reached for the hilt of the sword attached to his pants. "You fight me, and I won't hesitate to kill you."

"Bring it on asshole. No one attacks my friends."

A sudden flash of wonder rushed through Riku's mind at his words. Since when had he considered Sora or any of the other's his friends? They were the ones that had hurt him, had killed his father. They were the reason the was stuck on the outside, stuck in hell.

But then again, they didn't deserve being out here. Just like Tidus didn't. A blink of compassion mixed with the other already jumbled emotions, and Riku found himself faltering.

Tidus took his hesitation as an opportunity to strike. In a flash his blade was out and he was rushing Riku. Riku tried to block, and just barely managed to withstand the blow. Tidus didn't even look phased, but that single blow had tired Riku out. His moves were sluggish, where Tidus's were fast and powerful. He darted in and out, like a wolf slowly hamstringing it's target. Soon Riku's clothes were starting to smear with blood.

"Riku! Get out of here! Don't worry about me!" Sora's voice was high pitched, as if he were truly worried. It filled Riku with despair as the definite knowledge that he could not win slowly seeped into his mind.

"Yeah pretty-boy! Go back to your master! Get out of here! Scram!" Each of Tidus's taunts were followed by a quick, strength-draining strike. Riku's despair and anger increased, rising in him like a phoenix. His muscles burned, his body burned, and his soul receded, letting the fury of his burning despair and pain flood through him and fill him entirely.

The strength of despair, the madness of a cornered, wounded animal grasped Riku's heart, the same despair that had grasped every other person on the Outside, the despair that was in Cloud, in Sora, in Kairi, and even in the boy attacking him. It filled his mind with the only thing he had to focus on at the moment, the will to survive.

Despite the pain, despite the fire, Riku lashed out instead of trying to block Tidus's attack. It caught Tidus off guard and the sandy-haired boy tripped in an attempt to block the incoming blow. Riku slashed him up the arm, the hot blood within spilling across the ground.

Tidus stared at his open wound with a mix of shock and anger. "Y-you hit me." he stammered.

Riku was breathing hard, he couldn't hear, he couldn't really think. All he could concentrate on was the target in front of him, the source of his pain, the enemy. He dashed forward and was knocked back with a block by Tidus. The boy countered with a slash of his own that Riku just barely managed to dodge. The blade slipped into his shirt and sliced the fabric cleanly, making the whole right side of the garment fall off. Several gasps came from Sora's area, and Riku dimly heard one of the cronies say: "Sir, look, his arm!"

Riku glanced down at his own arm. There, just under his bicep, was the tattoo that marked him a citizen. The clean, unaltered barcode he had had since birth. The thing that anyone outside would kill for. It marked him an "Innie" an outsider among outsiders.

"You're an Innie." Tidus said, half-mockingly and half-angrily. "What the hell are you doing out here? Shouldn't you be inside? Eating steak and watching T.V.? Go back to your comfortable life."

Riku's eyes shimmered with seething hate as he stared at his enemy. "Don't you think I would if I could? Don't you think I'd get myself out of this hellhole as soon as possible without a second glance if I could? I don't want to be out here. It's the fucking outsiders' fault that I'm even out here. They attacked my father's ship, left me stranded without family, friends, or identification. I'm stuck out here the same as any of you assholes."

A gasp from Sora made Riku shut his mouth. He hadn't meant to say such hurtful things, but the anger that had welled up inside him had come bursting forth without constraint. He couldn't have stopped the remarks if he had tried.

Riku shook his head to clear the sentimental thoughts and rushed Tidus again. He wasn't going to lose this battle. He needed to win, to prove to someone, even if only himself, that he could take care of himself, that he wasn't worthless. He needed a route for his anger, and Tidus was as good as any.

Tidus blocked and pranced away neatly. "What the hell are you still fighting for? You just as much called your _friend_ trash. So why not just walk away?" Tidus had to stop to block yet another blow as Riku came at him again. They went on like that, Riku attacking and Tidus blocking and yelling snide remarks for several minutes. It was a desperate, ugly battle. Both sides had many cuts all over their bodies. Finally, Riku managed to maneuver Tidus close to the wall where the sandy-haired boy tripped over the jar Kairi had been washing with. Riku took the advantage and pushed the older boy against the wall, sword to his throat.

Several of the cronies started to rush forward, but Sora yelled at them. "Make a wrong move and Riku will kill him!"

Everyone froze. Riku and Tidus were breathing hard from their fight, and Riku's hand was shaking. The cool black steel of Riku's sword was covered in blood, making the thinner parts shine with the brilliance of a ruby.

"I'll kill you." Riku stated as he pressed the blade a little closer to Tidus's throat. The sandy-haired teen tried to move, but Riku had him pinned fairly well.

"Kill me and your friend is dead." Tidus growled back. He tried to act defiant, but Riku could hear the hint of fear in his voice, saw it shining in his eyes.

The clink of metal and a squawk from Kairi made Riku hesitate. Slowly ha moved back from the wall, making sure to keep Tidus at the end of his blade. "Get out of here." Riku growled. "All of you. Get the hell out of here and don't bother us."

Tidus paused a moment, then moved away from Riku, he waved at his mean and soon all of them were walking down the alley.

Riku hobbled over toward Sora. He was stiff, all his muscles ached and he was positive that he'd lost more blood than was healthy. Just as he was about to sit down on the ground, he heard a call from behind him.

All three kids looked up to see Tidus holding a gun and pointing it in their direction. The bang of gunfire, much like the backfire of a car, rang across the couple yards reached their ears shortly followed by Sora's cry of pain. Anxiously Riku crawled over to Sora and pulled off his shirt. A blossom of blood was forming around a small hole just between the shoulder and the collar bone.

"Sora!" Riku yelled. Hurriedly he tried to staunch the wound, using parts of his torn shirt to try and stop the bleeding. Kairi hovered behind him, worry in both her voice and movements.

"Will he be ok?!? Sora! Sora listen to me!!"

"Shut up and get me some water!" Riku growled at her. He ripped off the remainder of his shirt and tried to tie off the wound, like he had seen Leon do to Cloud, but it was at an awkward angle and Riku couldn't get the fabric to cooperate.

Kairi came back over with some water. Riku didn't ask where she had gotten it, the jar she had had full of water had been knocked over in the fight, but he accepted it gladly and dipped a strip of cloth in it. Sora was beginning to go into shock. He was sweating and mumbling under his breath, even shaking some. Riku laid the wet cloth on his forehead and ordered Kairi to hold it down and wet it if it became dry. Meanwhile Riku tried anxiously to stop the bleeding.

The wound was bleeding a lot, partially because of the strange spot where he had been hit. Riku was beginning to worry that he would die. "I need to get him back to Cloud's place." Riku said to Kairi. "Do you know anyone, I mean, _Anyone,_ who can help us?"

Kairi nodded and ran off. While she was gone Riku began to slowly clean the spot around the wound with the water. The hole was starting to close, making Riku glad that the bleeding was stopping, but also worried about getting the bullet out. If the wound closed Sora might have to live with the hunk of metal for the rest of his life, it could even possibly give him lead poisoning.

Kairi came back with a disgruntled man in his late 20's. The man looked from Riku to Sora and shook hi head. "Damn, kid, you two sure look beat up."

"Help." Riku panted. His vision was starting to blur as his own wounds began to affect him. "I can't carry him…" Riku managed.

"I wouldn't expect you to." The man replied. "Move back, you did a good job."

Riku started to scoot away, but the effort made him collapse. Within moments he was out cold.

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I'm back!!!!!! Yay!!!!!!!! I am no longer restricted from the computer, but I may take a while to update. I'm reeeeeeally sick, can't even believe I sat here long enough to write all of this.. And to make matters worse? I've only had like, 6 hours sleep in the last 5 days, and most of that was in the car. Have you ever slept in a car? It hurts, you get all cramped and sick and…blah…I have extreme car sickness too…..Man, this trip sucked. And my friend that I was trying to visit? We didn't even see each other. This vacation sucked….Well it's only 4:00, but I'm tired so I'm going to bed, and won't get up till noon tomorrow…!! Yay! Only problem there is that I have a night class tomorrow for writing…I love writing…but I don't love 3 hour classes late at night about writing….::sigh:: oh well…….Night all!

R&R!


	9. Cloud

-1**Title**: Dirge

**Pairing**: CloudXRiku!

**Rating**: M

**Warnings**: Yaoi , and violence, and bad language, lots of language.

**Music: **AFI- Death of Seasons

**Prompt**: Sin

_**Dirge: Chapter 7**_

_**Cloud…**_

Cloud was haggling with a vendor on the North side, close to his house. The man he was arguing with was younger than him, in his late teens at the most, but despite his age he was one of the best junk dealers in the area.

"20 silver." Cloud told him. "That's more than enough for cigarettes and machine oil."

"I dunno…" the kid replied. He looked Cloud over with a shrewd eye. "You are the top dog around here Cloud. And that is less than you gave me last time. Times have gotten harder, oil and smokes are harder to come by…."

"Listen you little brat, 20 or no deal. It's not as if you get much other business around here."

"25" the boy replied. "That's still less than last time."

"Last time I bought food as well, I'm not buying food this time. 22 and a copper."

"Fine, 22 and a copper." The boy smirked and pushed the packages forward. He held out his hand, eyeing Cloud's coin purse. "Thank you for your business." As soon as the coins touched his hand the boy snatched it back and ran his eyes over it. Cloud turned to leave when a sudden hiss from the boy made him look back.

"Cheater! You only gave me 20 silver! It was 22 silver!"

"I gave you 22!" Cloud growled. "Don't expect me to pay what I've already paid!"

"Liar! Give me the rest of my money!" The boy pulled out a small dagger from his bag and flicked the tip in Cloud's direction. "Or else."

Cloud smirked as he saw Squall walk up behind the boy. "Or else what?" his friend asked. The boy whipped around but was caught by Squall's strong arm. "Well lookie here…" Squall bent the boy's arm until 2 small silver coins rolled out of his shirt sleeve. "It looks like you found the other two silver."

The vender-boy glared at Squall and pulled his arm back. "I guess you're right…my apologies…" replied the boy as he rubbed his wrist.

"Hey Squall." Cloud smiled. "Thanks."

Squall only grunted in response. "Some great crime lord you are, can't even fight off a kid vendor."

"I don't want to fight anyone off." Cloud replied. "He's only trying to survive."

"So are we Cloud, you're too soft. If it wasn't for me, and for Zack, you wouldn't have lasted 5 minutes out here."

"Hey now, don't start that up again. You know I can be ruthless."

"Yeah, right, this from a guy who took in the boy who beat the shit out of him."

Cloud paused. "How do you know that?"

"You talk in your sleep."

"And you list-"

"Cloud!!! Leon!!!" Both men glanced up, ahead of them was Roxas, running toward them at full speed. He looked worried.

"What's wrong?" Cloud asked him. The younger boy fell forward, hands on his knees, panting hard.

"It's Sora! And Riku! They're hurt! Sora's got a gunshot wound and Riku's cut up really bad. Zexion brought them over but they don't look too good."

Cloud was off and running before Roxas could finish, pushing past people and dodging down alleyways. It took him nearly 5 minutes to get back to the house.

The inside was quiet. The only noise came from Cloud's room where Zexion was kneeling over the edge of the bed with a wet rag. Both Riku and Sora were out cold, lying on the bed like a couple of corpses.

"Cloud…" Zexion started, but he stopped when the younger man held up a hand. Cloud walked over to the two boys and examined them. Sora looked to be fine except for the bullet wound just above the left side of his clavicle. Riku looked more beat up, with many cuts all over his body, some deep, and some no more than scratches. Both boy's wounds were cleaned up, but Sora's looked to be infected, and he was pale, as if he had lost quite a bit of blood.

"What happened?" Cloud demanded.

"They were on the East side of the city. Near the House. I think they got caught by Tidus and his thugs, but when I got there the silver-haired kid passed out, and Sora was already in shock, so I couldn't ask them."

"Dammitt. Sora, what were you doing down there?"

"I think he was visiting a friend of his, a girl. She was the one who came and got me when they got hurt."

"Sora never said anything about being involved with a girl."

"I dunno." Zexion shrugged his shoulders and laid a wet cloth on Riku's forehead. "They both look bad though. Sora just broke his fever a few minutes ago, but this other kid seems to be slipping in and out of consciousness, keeps mumbling weird things and rolling around. He's sweating up a storm too. His cuts aren't life-threatening, but they seem to be affecting him pretty badly."

Anxiously Cloud looked from Sora to Riku. Of the two, Riku looked worse, if only because his skin was naturally pale, and the bright red of the dried blood made the difference stand out all the more. Sora was normally pretty tan, but the loss of blood had made his skin turn nearly the same shade as Riku's skin. Both boys looked to be on their deathbeds.

"Did you get the bullet out?" Cloud asked. Zexion shook his head.

"Too deep, and all I had was my pocket knife. If I had tried to get it out it might have reopened the wound. He couldn't lose that much blood, it would have killed him."

"What about Riku?"

"Riku? Is that his name? Anyways, he seemed to be ok despite all the cuts. Looks to me like he got into a sword fight. Not too far away from him I found this." At his words, Zexion held up Cloud's old sword, it was covered in dried blood. "Whoever he was fighting, he put up a good fight."

Cloud looked back down at Riku and brushed some of the hair out of his face. The boy's pale complexion was even paler, and his breathing was shallow. Sweat covered his forehead, making the blood and grime mix and stain his skin.

"…Do you think you can move Sora into the other room carefully? I think they'd do better away from each other, and Sora has less wounds to worry about. I'll take care of Riku."

"You sure about that Cloud?"

"Just do it."

Zexion hesitated a moment, then picked up Sora and left the room, leaving Cloud and Riku alone together in Cloud's room.

Moving between the wall and the bed, Cloud sat down and watched Riku sleep. The boy was obviously in pain, every few moments he'd start to turn, only to wince as one of his cuts would crack open. But not once did he wake up.

---------------------------------------------

It was night when Cloud awoke to Riku's mumbling. The silver-haired teen was tossing and turning in the bed, his face scrunched up in pain.

"No…don't…don't hurt me…"

"Riku?" Cloud asked. Slowly he sat up, wincing when his back cracked in protest. "Riku you ok?"

"Don't…don't hurt me…please…I'm scared….Daddy…"

"Riku wake up…it's ok…" Cloud reached out to shake Riku awake, but the teen shrunk away from his touch.

"No….go away…leave me alone…." Muffled sobs were coming from Riku as the boy tried to curl up into a ball. Unfortunately, some of his deeper cuts cracked open, causing him to cry out in pain.

"Riku stop it…it's ok…" Cloud crawled up onto the bed and pulled the younger boy to him in a tight embrace. Riku began to struggle at first, but as the comforting heat from Cloud's body enveloped him he began to calm down.

"Daddy…" Riku sniffed. The boy grabbed onto Cloud's shirt and tried to bury his head into it, tried to pull Cloud closer to him. "I wanna go home…" he mumbled.

"Shh…I know…" Cloud laid a hand on Riku's head, gently stroking his hair in an attempt to calm the boy down. "It's ok Riku…"

"Cloud…" the boy responded. Surprised, Cloud looked down to see if Riku was awake, but the boy's eyes were firmly closed. How had Riku known it was him? Or had it been some slip of the tongue? That had to be it, Riku was probably trying to say loud or something…

Neither Riku nor Cloud said anything more. Riku seemed to calm down at the feeling of Cloud holding him, and soon they both fell into a deep sleep.

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Well, I feel better, not as sick, and I couldn't resist writing yet another chapter. Finally we will begin on the CloudXRiku parts! I know they have been limited up to know…in fact….I think there was only one so far…anyways, it will get better! And the only one who is unhappy about it is Squall, I don't know why, he just doesn't like Riku. Poor Riku, but we love you! You and Cloud both!

R&R


	10. Love the Light

-1**Title**: Dirge

**Pairing**: CloudXRiku!

**Rating**: M

**Warnings**: Yaoi , and violence, and bad language, lots of language.

**Music: **One Winged Angel Sephiroth

**Movie**: Advent Children!

**Prompt**: Sin

_**Dirge: Chapter 7**_

_**Love of Light**_

Riku slept fitfully. Strange shadows enveloped his dreams, moving quickly, like wolves dancing around the edge of his consciousness. Several times he reached out to them, to try and grab them. They were real, he knew that as a fact, but he couldn't tell what they were, and it angered him. Some of the shadows would draw close, just enough for him to catch a glimpse of his father's face, or of a hand. Sora too, and Cloud. All the people from his past and present seemed to mingle and dance just beyond Riku's comprehension. He knew they were there, but he couldn't act on that knowledge.

"Daddy…" Riku called out in desperation, but his father's image shimmered and fell away, back into the wall of shadow surrounding the silver-haired boy. "No…"

One of the shadows manifested itself directly behind Riku, causing the boy to whirl. It was Tidus, standing behind him with a cocky grin on his face. His eyes were full of malice. "What's the matter? Want back to your comfortable life already? Ready to run away?"

"Do-don't hurt me…" Riku whispered. He wanted to say it louder, was desperate to send the shadow the message, but he found his voice was restricted. "Please….daddy…." He turned back to where his father's shadow had been, but the figure hadn't returned. Only the shapeless shadows remained, surrounding him in a torrent. "Don't hurt me!" Riku cried again, this time louder.

The shadow Tidus laughed. "Don't hurt you? Why not? You're playing out here now, you're on the outside, cut off from your comfortable life, cut off from everything you knew. Don't you like it? Or are you ready to run back to your old life with your tail tucked between your legs?"

Riku tried to ignore the shadow's taunts. His pride was taking a beating, but he was too far over the edge to care. At the moment, he was beginning to fill with the same despair that had taken him before.

"Riku? Riku it's ok…calm down…"

A voice, from somewhere cut into the shadows. The shadow-Tidus standing before Riku shimmered and then shattered, separating and flowing back into the storm. Riku looked up at where the voice had come from. The icy cold that had etched itself into his aching limbs was starting to dissipate with the light, the warmth of the voice coming toward him was too great. Slowly Riku opened himself up to the light, to the voice. "Cloud…." he murmured.

He didn't know why he said that name, of the many he could call. But he knew immediately that it was the right one. The light enveloped his consciousness, and within moments Riku was wrapped in a warm, deep sleep.

------------------------------------------------------------------

The sound of things crashing together woke Riku and Cloud at about the same time. Riku looked up into Cloud's clear, cobalt-blue eyes and blinked. It took a moment for him to realize that he was cradled in the man's arms, his head resting on the older man's chest.

"Good morning." Cloud whispered. Riku blinked again and shook his head, causing some of his hair to fall into his eyes.

"Morning…" Riku replied. He still wasn't awake, and the fact that he was laying on top of the other man, cradled in his arms had not yet completely struck home. Cloud gently reached up and brushed the hair back from Riku's eyes.

"Aw isn't this cute….now get up. We have work to do." Zexion was standing in the doorway, a scowl on his face. "Unless you two would like to sleep together all day."

"EEP!" Riku pinwheeled backwards off of Cloud to land awkwardly on the bed. The sight was comical, Riku's legs were tangled up in Cloud's and he was sitting at a weird angel with his hair sticking out in all directions. Cloud would have laughed had it not been for the ugly cut along Riku's shoulder that was starting to bleed again.

"Hold still." Cloud commanded. Riku froze as the older man leaned forward and removed the bloody bandage wrapped around Riku's shoulder. Clear, crimson blood trickled freely out of the cut.

Riku stared at the cut in disbelief. "Did…did Tidus do that?" he asked.

"I don't know. All I know is that the first day I let you out of the house by yourself you get into a fight and come back unconscious, toting Sora along with a bullet wound."

"Sora!" Riku cried. "Is he alright? He's not dead is he??"

"He's fine for now, but he can't stay conscious long. With a lot of sleep he should be fine." Zexion moved away from his position in the doorway and approached Riku. "What I would like to know is what happened to you guys. I was having a great time at the House until your friend pulled me out and drug me over to ya. You guy's had lost so much blood I thought you would have died for sure. I wouldn't expect ya to be alive, let alone up and moving already."

"What happened?" Cloud asked. His voice betrayed no emotion, it was calm, cool, solid. Riku let it ring in his ears for a moment before answering.

"We were visiting a friend of Sora's when this guy, Tidus, attacked us for no reason. I fought back, and…..I dunno I just kinda snapped. Next thing I knew Tidus was against the wall with my sword to his throat. There was ….was a lot of blood. I told him to leave, but when I turned away, he….he shot Sora. I don't really remember anything other than that."

"Do you remember the fight at all?" Zexion asked.

Riku shook his head. "No…All I remember was this awful feeling, and then….all the blood."

Cloud plopped a hand down on Riku's head and rubbed the silver hair gently. "Don't worry about it." he said smoothly. "It happens in a battle. Sometimes, when you get angry enough, all you see is red, and you just fight to survive."

Riku shivered and pulled his legs closer to him in a sort of fetal position. "I didn't like it…."

"No one does. Don't worry you're going to be ok." Cloud cooed. He continued to gently stroke Riku's hair comfortingly.

"Well, I'd love to stick around for the love fest, but I've got things to do. I'll leave everything in your care ok Cloud?" Zexion waved a hand in Cloud's direction before walking out of the room, leaving Cloud and Riku alone.

After the older man had left, the room seemed to echo with silence. After a few minutes it was broken by Riku.

"Why…why are you here?" Riku asked quietly.

"What do you mean?"

"Why are you here….with me?"

"Why wouldn't I be? You're my responsibility, or did you forget that?"

"But…what about Sora? Isn't he your responsibility too?"

Cloud shook his head, his blonde hair flopping in and out of his vision smoothly as he did so. "Sora is Sora's responsibility. He's been an outsider for life. You on the other hand, have been out here for what? A month?"

"…So that makes me your responsibility?" Riku responded, a hint of bitterness in his voice.

"Would you rather be back with your dad?" Cloud asked softly.

"Why….why do you say that?"

"You talked to him in your sleep. You kept calling his name."

"I said that aloud?"

"Yep."

"Oh…"

"Riku….do you wish you were back Inside? You know, inside the city?" Cloud allowed his eyes to slowly roam over Riku's slumped form, taking in the look of utter helplessness the boy produced.

"…"…" Riku couldn't respond to that. It wasn't that he didn't want to, but he just didn't know. City life was all he had known until he got stranded outside. And now that he had been there, had seen everything through two perspectives, he didn't know if he could ever really go back. Who could? His life had changed forever, he was no longer an Innie, he was as much an outcast of society as Cloud was. It wasn't a fair thing, Riku's new-found knowledge had come at a price. But Riku wasn't entirely sure he would have liked to remain ignorant of it all.

"No." he finally replied.

That response surprised Cloud. He sat up higher in the bed and cast his gaze over to Riku once more. "No?"

"No…because….because if I hadn't been trapped out here, I wouldn't have met you…." He had meant to say you Sora and the others, but something stopped him. A little part of his brain told him to pause there, to say no more.

Riku's words seemed to echo throughout the room. Cloud just stared at him with semi-wide eyes, half believing and half not believing what he had heard. It might not even have been what he interpreted it as, but something, some little tendril of hope wound it's way up through his chest like the smoke from his cigarettes.

"Just me?" he asked softly.

"Mostly you." Riku responded. "Though I don't know why, you were rarely here. I never saw you….but when I did, you showed more open compassion and sympathy for me than my father ever did. I know, this sounds really sappy and stuff…but ….uh…yeah…" Embarrassed, Riku turned away and committed himself to staring at the wall.

Cloud watched the back of Riku's skull, examining the way light played off his silver hair. They boy was more beautiful than Cloud had originally thought, though he didn't know what had caused the shift in appearance. Maybe it was the absence of the baby-fat that Riku had still had on him when he was new. Maybe it was the wild appearance he had obtained during his stay with the gang. Or maybe it was just the work of an attraction that was beginning to grow n the pit of Cloud's stomach. Whatever the case though, Cloud now found Riku to be the most beautiful person he had ever met.

Clearing his throat, Cloud looked away. "Well…" he said. "I'm not going to be busy today. Squall and I have already planned the next raid, but this incident with Sora has set us back. Since I don't have much in the way of work to do until the next raid….what do you say I try to teach you some things about the city? You don't have to move much, but I would think you'd like to talk more than just sit there right?"

Riku paused a moment, then nodded. "Alright." he replied. "Teach me."

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Another chapter, I wrote this one right after re-watching Advent Children. It is 1:00 in the morning and I'm not even tired! Woo hoo! Anyways, I hope I'm not boring anyone with my story, cuz apparently, I'm getting a whole bunch of people looking at the first chapter, but only a few looking at the later ones. And not many reviews…only 20 last time I checked. That makes me sad…I like reviews! Please leave a review! I love to hear any kind of comment, or at least talk to people. You know, it wouldn't hurt some of my reviewers to talk to me…Anyways, I'm babbling…please R&R!


	11. Teach me

-1**Title**: Dirge

**Pairing**: CloudXRiku!

**Rating**: M

**Warnings**: Yaoi , and violence, and bad language, lots of language.

**Music: **HIM - Soul on Fire

**Prompt**: Sin

_**Dirge: Chapter 11**_

_**Teach Me**_

"No wonder you got so beat up, you were holding the sword all wrong." Cloud took the blade away from Riku a swung it lightly through the air with one arm. He had an amazing amount of control, allowing the blade to slice neatly through the air and come to a stop less than an inch from the tip of Riku's nose.

Riku didn't even flinch. He knew Cloud wouldn't hurt him, and after his display during the night he wanted to show Cloud that he too could be strong.

"Look, here's the first thing you did wrong." Cloud walked over to Riku and pulled up his arm till it was parallel to his own, then he placed the sword gently into his hand, molding his fingers around the handle in just the right position.

"When you showed me how you held it before you held it with both hands with your arms outstretched and your elbows locked. If you do that, you lose the maneuverability that comes with such a light sword. You're handling it like you would a broadsword, something heavy, this sword is thin and short, it's designed for speed."

"But that was how I saw Sora and Roxas hold their weapons." Riku replied. "Wouldn't it be the same?"

"No, Sora uses a keyblade, it's designed basically as a sharp club. It's heavier than your sword too. It's meant to strike heavy blows, this weapon is designed for quick, slashing, jabs."

"Like Tidus. He was moving so fast I couldn't block him very easily."

"Yes, but your sword should be faster. It's smaller, making it a bad blocking weapon. So don't even try to block incoming attacks, try to dodge them. Any attack you try to block still has a good chance of catching you. Now, hold the word like this and wave it through the air, using the blade to cut through any resistance."

Riku slowly began to move the blade, letting his arm bend and rotate naturally. With a few corrections from Cloud, he soon found that the sword could act as an extension of his arm, with his wrist as a second elbow. The more he thought about it like that, the more naturally the movements seemed to come.

"See? You're doing great."

"Yeah, but my arm's getting tired." Riku complained. "When I use two hands it doesn't get so tired."

"But you lose the speed, and without the speed this weapon is practically worthless. You don't have much in the way of muscle yet, when you get stronger, your endurance will grow and you'll be able to hold the sword longer."

"Whatever, I think it would be easier just to club stuff, like with the keyblades."

"Here, let me see the sword." as soon as the blade left Riku's fingertips, Cloud moved away from him to the center of the roof. They had decided to talk up there to get out of the stuffy building, and because Squall would have had a fit if he knew Cloud was goofing off with Riku instead of doing his work.

Cloud stood still for a few moments, and Riku saw Cloud's gaze turn stony and cold. His face became hard as granite as he focused on an unseen target.

Without warning Cloud slashed out, the movement was so fast that Riku couldn't even see it, all he saw was a blur as Cloud slashed time and again at the unseen target. He even allowed the blade to move from hand to hand, fluidly, as if the blade were a part of him. It was like the feeling Riku had sensed earlier, only on a much higher level.

Cloud continued to dance, his black clothes combined with the black blade made him look much like a shadow. He would weave, in and out, twirling to face another invisible opponent. As Riku watched he felt he could almost see the attackers, almost like a story told only through Cloud's movements. It was a beautiful, fluid sight.

The performance ended with one last slice, straight down into the heart of whatever demon Cloud was facing. The blonde wasn't breathing hard, didn't show any symptoms of fatigue, and just plain looked hot . Riku didn't even realize his jaw was hanging open.

Cloud stood up slowly, his entire stony demeanor gone. He walked over silently, until he was directly in front of Riku, and ruffled up the younger boy's hair. "Don't look so surprised." Cloud chuckled. I told you this weapon was built for speed and maneuverability. It's much more elegant than a club."

"That….was amazing!" Riku continued to stare at the older man in utter amazement. "Where did you learn how to do that??"

Cloud plopped himself down on the roof and smiled at the younger boy. "Zack taught me, a long time ago, when I was a little older than you. And you know what? I asked him the very same questions you asked me."

Taking care not to crack open any of his wounds, Riku limped over to Cloud and sat next to the man. "Really?"

"Yeah, I was really curious back then. It was that curiosity that got me in trouble a lot."

"What kind of trouble?"

"Fights mostly. I couldn't take an insult, and unfortunately, when you grow up a House boy, you get a lot of insults, have to swallow your pride a lot."

"You….you were a House boy?"

Cloud nodded. "Ansem picked me up shortly after I got convicted and kicked out of the city. Just like he did you. Zack eventually bought me out of the House after Squall had….er….seen me there."

"So Squall was the one who found you?"

"Well…..uh….he was the one who _slept_ with me….he was one of my regular clients….He thought that if Zack got me out of the House then he and I could well….date. He liked me a lot."

"So….are you and he?…."

"No. When Zack got me out of the House I refused to date anyone. I was bitter from everything I had been through. I hated everyone. Eventually though, I began to come around. Zack and I grew close, but about 2 years ago he died, in a territory fight. He died saving my life."

"So that's how he died."

"Yeah. But enough reminiscing. There are other things you would do well to learn besides the past."

"But I like hearing about your past. Well….not _like…_ I uh…"

"It's ok, I know what you mean." Cloud responded as he gently ruffled Riku's hair. Riku blushed some and turned away from the older man. "Well…" Cloud continued. "I guess I should probably tell you about Tidus's gang now…just so you know why he attacked you guys."

"You know why?" Riku asked, surprised. "I though it was just cuz he's a jerk."

"Oh he's a jerk, but that isn't why he attacked you guys."

"It was about territory right? That's what he said when we were there, he said we were on his territory."

"Well, he _thinks_ it's his territory. Tidus is a dangerous boy. He used to work in the House on the East side until he got into a major fight with the owner. He got punished severely and then kicked out on the streets."

"Punished? How could he be punished worse than being in the House? I would think putting him on the streets would have been better, not worse."

"Well…." Cloud paused a moment, the heat rising to his cheeks. "Well, to uh….to punish him, they er…._fixed_ him…you know…like a dog?"

"They cut his balls off?!?!?!" Riku yelled in horror. "You have got to be fucking kidding me!!!"

"Shhhh!!!!!" cloud slapped a hand over Riku's mouth and pulled him down. "Not so loud….Anyways, yes, they castrated him then kicked him out. He grew angry and made his own gang out of boy's he knew back in the House. But they aren't like us, they don't know loyalty or friendship. All they know is anger. Like in the fight you had with Tidus? If we had been there everyone would have mobbed Tidus at once before he could get more than a blow in. But his gang is ruled by hierarchy. They're constantly squabbling with themselves over who's the leader, and their as dumb as a sack of potatoes, and not worth anywhere near as much. But they have brawn, they're strong, and not anyone you want to mess with. Tidus especially hates me because he tried to assimilate his way into my gang, and I wouldn't let him."

"So that's why he was so mad at me."

"What do you mean?"

"He asked me if I had to sleep with you to get into the gang. He got really mad that I was in and he wasn't."

Cloud blushed slightly at Riku's words. When Riku had said "sleep with you" it had brought an image into Cloud's mind, one he shouldn't have thought. Embarrassed, he tried to shake the thought away, but it seemed to want to stay in the front of his mind. '_That's just wrong.' _ He thought. '_Riku's just a kid, that thought is wrong…'_

"Cloud?"

Cloud jumped, startled by Riku's voice. They boy was looking at him strangely. "You ok Cloud?"

"Yeah, I'm fine…"

"Oh…ok…" Riku looked away again, back out over the other buildings. Cloud let out a small, mental sigh.

Cloud studied Riku's motionless form for a few moments. He seemed frail, and Cloud was struck yet again with how lonely he seemed. Even inside the gang he wasn't truly accepted yet. Cloud's mind began to slowly drift back to the words Riku had shared with him that morning.

----------------

"_Riku….do you wish you were back Inside? You know, inside the city?" _

"………._No_."

"_No?"_

"_No…because…because if I hadn't been trapped out here, I wouldn't have met you…." _

"_Just me?" _

"_Mostly you. Though I don't know why, you were rarely here. I never saw you…but when I did, you showed more open compassion and sympathy for me than my father ever did. _

_----------------_

'_He just wants to be loved. He's still a kid, he needs the attention and understanding of someone who loves him. He wants so be accepted, but he's confused and doesn't know where to turn. He reminds me so much of me, back when Zack first took me in. Alone, scared, and isolated, but still trying to be strong.'_

Cloud let his thoughts settle as he watched the silver-haired teen in beside him. '_I don't want him to go through what I did.' _ Slowly, hesitantly, Cloud reached out to Riku. He was going to pull the boy back into his lap, but the idea, mixed with the thought he had had earlier, made him afraid of coming off as too friendly, so he gently laid his hand on Riku's head again, so he could rub the boy's soft hair.

Riku didn't even stir.

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So cute

I can't think of anything to ramble about down here…how unusual…except that I am happy for getting so many reviews! 6 on the last chapter! That's great! Thank you so much!

Please R&R!


	12. warmth

-1**Title**: Dirge

**Pairing**: CloudXRiku!

**Rating**: M

**Warnings**: Yaoi , and violence, and bad language, lots of language.

**Music: **Flyleaf- I'm So Sick

**Prompt**: Sin

_**Dirge: Chapter 11**_

_**Warmth**_

The following days were spent recovering and talking to Cloud. It seemed that, with Sora injured, the group was unable to do any more work, and although Squall complained about it a lot, Cloud was free to spend the time doing whatever he wanted, namely spend time with Riku.

Not that they could do much. Most of the time Cloud and Riku just spent the time sitting on the roof talking about random things. Somehow, the subject always turned to someone's past. Riku soon knew the history of every person living in the gang as well as if he had spent years with them. Cloud explained everything he wanted to know, and even encouraged him to ask questions.

"It shows you're smart." He told Riku once. "There is no such thing as an honest stupid question."

"I've never heard anyone say it like that before." Riku responded. "What do you mean by honest?"

"Well, when Zack told me once that there was no such thing as a stupid question I replied with 'Ok, now can I take all the money and supplies and dump them in the river?'"

Riku tried to suppress a laugh, but he wasn't able to hide his smile. "You are so weird."

"Who are you calling weird?"

"You obviously."

Cloud smiled at Riku and was about to come back with a witty reply when a man waved at them from several buildings away.

"Who's that?" Riku asked. The man was walking toward them, and he didn't look happy.

"That's Vincent….But I don't know what he's doing so far over here…" Cloud frowned and stood up. "Stay here." he told Riku.

The order didn't please Riku, and he had a strong urge to do the exact opposite of what Cloud asked, but the serious look on both his face and Vincent's made Riku think better of it.

Cloud met Vincent on the next roof. The angle they were at made it impossible for Riku to read their lips, but at the deepening of Cloud's troubled expression Riku knew something was up.

Finally, not being able to stand just sitting there, Riku stood up and walked over to where the two men were standing.

As he neared, he heard Cloud say in a hushed voice. "You're sure he's moving the date up? Even with Sora's injury?"

"Yes, that was why I came up. Roxas isn't ready for scouting and Sora's too badly injured. As it is you'll be going with one less person, and security is bound to be tighter after that explosion."

"We could delay it until Dirge. The extra time might make the difference. Sora would be ready by then."

"We can't wait that long. The assets are already running low and you know it. That _boy_ you took in eats more than Axel did, and we're living off the dregs of our cash. We got nothing out of the last raid, sold all of our stock, and then lost another 100 gold for the kid. I'm sorry Cloud, but you'll have to use what you have and move forward."

Cloud licked his lips and looked down. Riku immediately noticed the nervous habit he had of slightly shaking his head so his hair would shift in front of his eyes. "Alright." Cloud replied. "We'll do it Squall's way. We'll leave tomorrow, think you'll be ready by then?"

"I'm fine Cloud. And don't worry, things will go smoothly."

"Yeah well, this will be the first time going in with only 2 people. If only Sora hadn't gotten hurt…"

"If onlys won't do us any good." Vincent replied. "Cloud you're starting to fall apart. What's going on? Squall has had to save this family from going down the drain several times now."

"I'm sorry Vincent. I….I'm just trying to cope alright?"

"You never should have gotten emotionally involved, you know that Cloud."

"I was young and stupid. Lay off it alright? I'm fine, I'm over it."

"I don't really believe that, but it's your choice. Just don't drag everyone else down with you."

"… Is that all?"

"Yes. I'll be staying here with you guys until the operation is pulled off. Then I'm out of here, I have other things I need to get done."

"Fine…."

The two men continued to talk, they still hadn't noticed Riku standing there. Taking advantage of the oversight, Riku backed up away from them to sit back down where he had been before. Thoughts whirled through his head uncontrollably. Thoughts about what Vincent had said, about Cloud being emotionally attached. Weren't all the gang members attached emotionally? But then again, Riku couldn't remember anyone being overly emotional about Sora's wound. Or even much mourning over the boy Axel. The more Riku thought about it, the more it made sense to him. That had been why Squall had gotten so mad about Cloud buying him, and why Squall always gave Cloud a hard time. The compassion the older man showed didn't really show in the others. Not even Sora was as warm. Maybe that was what the growing attraction Riku was feeling was attached to, Cloud's warmth.

"Riku?" Riku's head whipped up at the sound of Cloud's voice. Vincent was already making his way down the stairs, but Cloud stood a few feet away. For the first time, Riku was able to look him in the eyes.

"Cloud?" Riku asked. He hesitated a moment, not sure if he could really ask Cloud what was on his mind, then after deliberating it, he moved forward. "Could you come here for a moment?"

Cloud blinked and nodded, then made his way over to crouch in front of Riku. "What?" he asked.

Riku looked to make sure Vincent was gone, then sat up on his knees, so that he was level with Cloud's head. Before he could convince himself that it would be stupid or sappy, he leaned forward and embraced Cloud tightly while burying his head into the blonde's neck. Riku felt Cloud stiffen at the touch, but he didn't care, he just pulled the older man closer and whispered in his ear.

"Emotions are a good thing, I don't care what Vincent says."

"You…you heard?" Cloud asked quietly.

Riku nodded against Cloud's neck and tried to hug the man tighter. "You're warmer than everyone here, I don't want you to ever lose that. Please…"

Riku opened his eyes as he felt Cloud's arms wrap around him tightly. "Thank you Riku. You don't know how much that means to me."

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::sniff:: R&R!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!


	13. I Killed a Man

-1**Title**: Dirge

**Pairing**: CloudXRiku!

**Rating**: M

**Warnings**: Yaoi , and violence, and bad language, lots of language.

**Music: **Gackt- Death Wish

**Prompt**: Sin

_**Dirge: Chapter 11**_

_**I killed a man**_

Riku was fidgety for the remainder of the day, and Cloud was no better. They didn't talk anymore about random things, and they didn't spend anymore time together. Cloud was busy getting ready for the raid, and Riku was forced to just wait and watch. Eventually the teen grew bored of just sitting and watching, so he got up to go visit Sora in his room.

Sora was propped up on the bed with a rolled up blanket. He was awake, just staring at the wall with a look that could kill.

"Hey," Riku called as he entered the room, Sora didn't look up, but his expression immediately changed to a pained smile.

"Hey." Sora called back. "How are you? Feeling better?"

"Yeah, and you?"

"I'm ok, but my shoulder itches."

"That must be a pain."

"Yeah."

"…"

"They're planning the next raid aren't they?"

Riku hesitated to answer. "Um…"

"Don't try to hide it, I can tell by the way they're moving around out there. Besides, it's about time they got around to another chance. We must be running low on money…"

"If it makes you feel any better Cloud wanted to wait until you were healed."

"…Yeah, that sounds like him. I bet Squall bullied him into moving."

"Actually Squall bullied Vincent into bullying Cloud."

"Heh, figures. Squall bullies everyone."

"Yeah, and he hates me."

"He doesn't hate you, he's that way to everyone."

"Yeah right, he just shows more open hostility toward me."

"It's because you're still new, give it some time and he'll come around."

"Okay…"

"Say Riku?"

"Yeah?"

"You and Cloud are close right?"

"Well, kind of. We talk…"

"Yeah, well, do you think you'd be able to get him to give you a gold piece? And do you think you could get it to Kairi?"

"…..Why are you asking me? Why don't you ask him?" 

"I don't want to tell him why."

"How come?"

"Because we aren't supposed to get close to anyone out here. I don't want him to find out I got involved with a girl."

"I'm sure Cloud would understand." Riku responded, thinking back to earlier.

Sora shook his head. "Cloud would get mad, I know he would…..Please Riku? Could you try to do it for me?"

"…..Yeah sure."

"Thanks…"

Riku smiled at Sora, but thoughts kept mingling in his head. Cloud wouldn't get mad at Sora, he knew he wouldn't, but Sora seemed to think he would. But how on Earth was Riku supposed to get Cloud to give him a gold piece?

Sighing, Riku watched his friend's face slowly slip back into that awful mix of pain and fear. Riku wanted to help Sora, he really did, but he wasn't entirely sure how.

-------------------------------------------

The next day came way too fast. Riku awoke early as he heard Cloud and Squall get out of bed. Carefully, so as not to let them know he was awake, Riku rolled over in his bed and watched them from the corner of his eye. Cloud was acting nervous. He already had a cigarette in his mouth, it was unlit, but he seemed to find comfort out of chewing on the end of it.

"Ready?" Squall asked. He already had his weapon out. Cloud was still nervously wiping off the blade of his own sword.

"Right." Cloud responded. He picked up his sword and secured it in place on the strap behind his back. "I'm ready."

Both men walked out of the room. Riku waited a few moments, then got up and peeked around the edge of the door. Vincent, Cloud, and Squall were standing around in the main room, talking quietly. Vincent was the first to leave.

"Don't screw this up." Squall told Cloud.

"Don't tell me anything about screwing up Squall. I'm ready for this alright?" Riku caught the glare that Cloud threw at Squall, but the other man didn't seem to notice or care.

Squall was the second to leave, leaving Cloud alone in the room. Riku watched as the blonde took a few deep breaths to calm himself, and then donned the stony, merciless look he had had when he had shown Riku how to use his sword. Then he too left, walking out the blanket-covered door into the pre-dawn.

Riku made sure the men were gone, then ran back into his room to grab his sword. He had made up his mind that he would fight with Cloud, or at least watch what was going on. Excitement took hold of the teen as he dashed out of building and silently tailed the three men.

--------------------------

All three men split up along the way, making it difficult for Riku to know who to follow. He had to make a split decision, because when they had broken up Vincent and Cloud had both started running. Squall was the only one who walked to where he was going.

Riku followed Cloud. It was the obvious decision, as the blonde would be the least upset if Riku should be discovered. But even so, keeping up was difficult for the young teen. Cloud was fast, and seemed to know exactly where he was going.

Finally they came to a stop on the edge of the town, back on that same grassy slope where Riku had first met Cloud. At the bottom of the incline was the waterway.

Cloud walked over to the edge of the slope. He was framed between two buildings, and the shadows they cast hid him perfectly from anyone below.

There was a boat on the waterway. It was moored to the small dock by one of the rest houses along the bank. From what could be seen, the boat was larger than Riku's had been, and there were several guards walking around the perimeter.

"Damn…" Cloud spat out the chewed up cigarette in his mouth and ran a hand through his spiky hair. "Guards, I should have known. Especially after that boat of Riku's. Looks like there will be fighting…."

Movement along the opposite side of the hill caught Cloud's eye. It was Squall, he was waving at Cloud to get ready to descend.

"Shit." Cloud growled. "Looks like I have no choice." He waited a few moments, then quietly slipped down the side of the hill, using the shadows of the buildings and a few dead bushes to hide his presence.

Riku looked out across the hill. He could just barely make out Squall doing the same as Cloud, moving slowly along the hill, using the cover of the building and the night to shield him from the guard's eyes.

Shouting from the guards made Riku's attention shift back to the bottom of the hill. Vincent was already in among the guards. There was a body on the ground from where he had already struck and the guards were in a panic, each trying to hit Vincent while trying to not hit each other. It wasn't working very well, and the group was stirred up into chaos.

Vincent got out of the group quickly, and several of the guards ran after him, but the others were smart and stayed where they were. They knew what was coming.

Cloud struck before Squall. He dashed out of the bushes, brandishing that huge sword of his. The guards spotted him and managed to get a few shots off in his direction before he was right in with them, slashing and dodging. Squall came soon after, doing his own damage to the guards.

The guards that had been chasing Vincent turned at the sound of gunfire and ran back toward their comrades. By the time they got there though, 3 of the other guards were dead and there were even more wounded.

It was hard to see much more than that from where he was sitting, so Riku crawled out from his hiding spot and made his way carefully down the hill. When he got to a better vantage point he peeked out of the bushes to see what was happening.

Cloud was wounded in his right leg, probably form a stray bullet. He was moving slower than he was earlier, and several of the guards were ganging up on him. Squall was similarly occupied, and Vincent was no where in sight. Riku was starting to worry that they might lose the fight.

But then Cloud whirled his sword around and slammed one of the guards in the back of the head. The man immediately fell to the ground, unconscious. Cloud was using the blunt end of his sword to knock the guards out, instead of killing them. Squall didn't seem to have any such qualms, and was killing every person that came near him.

The battle moved closer to the edge of the hill, toward Riku's hiding spot, making Riku suddenly wish he had stayed on top of the hill. Quickly the silver-haired teen tried to get up and run away, when he heard the familiar clink of a gun being cocked. A man, not too far away from Riku, had raised a gun and was taking careful aim at Cloud's head. The blonde didn't even notice as he swung his sword at yet another guard.

Riku raced forward, his blade drawn. He wasn't really sure what he was doing, only that he wasn't going to let this man shoot Cloud. He placed the sword in front of him, with one hand, as Cloud had taught him, and lunged for the man.

The gunman turned around a split second before Riku struck. The tip of the sword slammed right into the man stomach, and buried in up to the hilt. Riku froze, the man froze, neither of them moved until the man let out a strange half-groan and clutched at his stomach.

Riku released his sword and took a shaky step backwards. Blood from the man's stomach was on his hands and shirt. It was hot, almost scalding hot. Riku frantically tried to wipe it off, but only succeeded in making it smear more. He looked up with wide eyes at the man who still had the sword sticking out of stomach. He was almost dead, and he was shaking as he tried to pull the blade out of his stomach.

Riku screamed, that was all he could think of to do. The sight of the man standing there, with a sword in his stomach, Riku's sword, spilling blood, blood that was on Riku, was just too much for his brain to process. He screamed.

"Riku?? What the hell are you doing out here?" Cloud was somehow behind him, pulling him back from the body to the bushes. "Stay here." Cloud commanded, but Riku didn't even here him. He was staring at the man who was by now dead, lying n the dirt leaking blood and staring at Riku with cold, hard eyes. Riku couldn't take his eyes from the scene.

'_I killed a man.I killed a man.I killed a man.I killed a man.I killed a man.I killed a man.I killed a man.I killed a man.I killed a man.I killed a man.I killed a man.I killed a man.I killed a man.I killed a man.I killed a man.I killed a man.I killed a man.I killed a man.I killed a man.I killed a man.I killed a man.I killed a man.I killed a man.I killed a man.I killed a man.I killed a man.I killed a man.I killed a man.I killed a man.I killed a man.I killed a man.I killed a man.I killed a man.I killed a man.I killed a man.I killed a man.I killed a man.I killed a man.I killed a man.I killed a man.I killed a man.I killed a man.I killed a man.I killed a man.I killed a man.I killed a man.I killed a man.I killed a man.I killed a man.I killed a man.I killed a man.I killed a man.I killed a man.I killed a man.I killed a man.I killed a man.I killed a man.I killed a man.I killed a man.I killed a man.I killed a man.I killed a man.I killed a man.I killed a man.I killed a man.I killed a man.I killed a man.I killed a man.I killed a man.I killed a man.I killed a man.I killed a man.I killed a man.I killed a man.I killed a man.I killed a man.I killed a man. OH SHIT I killed a man.'_

"Cloud" Riku managed to mumble, then louder. "Cloud!"

But Cloud was busy fighting. All of the guards were either dead or knocked out now except for two, one of whom was running while the other was attacking Cloud. Cloud quickly knocked the guard out and motioned for Squall to talk. They exchanged words and Squall motioned for Cloud to go, then headed toward the boat.

Cloud stared at he ground a moment, then walked over to the man Riku had killed. He bent down and rolled the body over, so the hilt of the sword was facing up, then he placed a foot on the man's chest and pulled the sword out, wiping it on the grass to get rid of most of the blood.

Riku just stared at him in horror. Cloud walked over to the younger boy and grabbed his arm, lifting him up so he could look Cloud in the eye. Riku just stared at him with a look of pure horror and fear on his face.

"Come on…." Cloud said. "We're going home." And with that, he pulled Riku along with him up the hill.

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I can't think of anything to say….again…..weird….I hope this chapter makes sense, I'm kind of iffy about it.

R&R!


	14. It's Just a Kiss Right?

-1**Title**: Dirge

**Pairing**: CloudXRiku!

**Rating**: M

**Warnings**: Yaoi , and violence, and bad language, lots of language.

**Music: **HIM - The 9th Circle

**Prompt**: Sin

_**Dirge: Chapter 14**_

_**It's Just a Kiss Right?**_

"What the hell were you thinking? Coming after us like that? You could have been killed!"

Riku just stared at Cloud numbly. They were back in the house, in Cloud's room. Riku was sitting on the bed while Cloud was standing over him, anger and concern plastered all over his face.

"Why did you come? Why didn't you just stay here?!?"

"I…"

"You what???"

"I…..I wanted to help."

"You wanted to help? And what would have happened if you had been killed? Your wounds aren't even all healed yet!"

Riku mumbled a response. Cloud glared at the younger boy. "What?" He asked.

"I saved your life." Riku responded. "The man was going to shoot you."

Cloud paused a moment and looked down into Riku's defiant eyes. "Do you think that justifies you coming?"

"If I hadn't come you'd be dead." The teen replied bitterly. "And I'm not a child, you don't have to look after me."

"You acted like a child out there. The moment that man hit the ground you were freaking out."

"I've never killed a man before."

"You've seen them killed."

"No I haven't. Not until today."

"… What do you want me to do Riku? Thank you? Praise you? You could have gotten yourself killed and you came along after I told you not to."

"You never told me not to come."

"I thought you understood that! If Sora couldn't come what in God's name made you think you could?"

"What makes Sora so much more independent than me? Don't you trust me?"

"Any trust I did have you betrayed."

"Betrayed how? By saving your life? I'm not a little kid, I can make my own decisions and I chose to come after you, and because I did, I saved you! What if I hadn't come? How long would I survive with you dead?"

"…What are you saying?"

"I'm saying that I made a decision and it came out for the best. Don't yell at me for something that could have happened, because it didn't."

"Don't expect me to be grateful."

"I'm not, I'm just expecting you to see what's in front of your face."

"What do you mean?"

"You're so stupid! You don't understand anything." Riku crossed his arms and turned away from Cloud, making the older man stare at his back in puzzlement.

"What are you talking about?" The blonde asked. He was confused, Riku was acting strange. Sure he had said some hurtful things just then, but needed to understand that he couldn't just follow Cloud everywhere like a puppy. He was going to get hurt if he did that.

A sniff from Riku made Cloud come back to reality. "Riku?" he asked.

Riku ignored him and was careful to keep his back to Cloud. But another sniff made Cloud crawl up onto the bed with the younger boy. "Riku are you crying?"

"You don't understand." Riku choked. "You just don't get it."

"I don't get what?" Cloud had never been so perplexed in his life. Riku was acting strange, and now he was crying. What was wrong with him?

"I just went through the most horrifying moment in my life and all you can do is yell at me." Riku responded.

Cloud paused, then pulled the younger boy back into his lap and sighed. "I'm sorry Riku. I know how terrible it is to kill a man."

"Not that." Riku replied, shaking his head. "Not just that. I was afraid, when I saw him aim at your head. I was afraid I was going to lose you…"

You were scared he was going to kill me?" The older man asked quietly.

"Yeah…" Riku sniffed and pulled his legs up tight against him.

"I didn't know you cared so much…" Cloud responded. Gently he wound his arms around Riku's midsection, bringing the boy flush against his chest.

"Why wouldn't you know? I thought it was obvious." Riku replied. He proved his words by laying his head back against Cloud's chest and holding onto his arm. "I told you, you were the only one who showed me any warmth, showed me anything solid."

"Yeah but… I didn't think that meant anything…."

"Of course it meant something you idiot. Why do you think I told you not to lose your emotions? I don't want to see you turn out like the others. I love you too much for that to happen…"

Cloud froze and replayed those words through his head. "Did….did you just say you loved me?" he asked incredulously.

"Yeah…" Riku replied. "I hope you don't take that wrong…um…you know…I ….well…this is awkward…." Suddenly not feeling so sure of himself, Riku tried to pry his way out of Cloud's arms. Bu Cloud suddenly pulled him back and held him in a tight embrace. Riku looked up into Cloud's eyes questioningly. "What?" he asked.

"…..I love you too." Cloud responded. Riku's eyes widened and the younger boy fumbled for the right words.

"You…you serious?"

"If you were."

"You love me."

"Yep."

They stared at each other for a few more moments, when Riku fiunally decided to brak the silence.

"Then kiss me."

"What?"

"If you really love me, kiss me."

"You don't just ask someone to kiss you like that, you have to come to it gradually, you know, move forward all slow like, hesitantly and-"

Cloud was cut off as Riku suddenly sat up straighter and planted his lips on Cloud's. Riku's eyes were closed, but the older man's were wide open, staring at the younger boy in amazement. When Riku finally did pull back, Cloud licked his lips. "Well…" he said. "I wasn't expecting that."

"You talk to much." Riku replied as he reached up and pulled the man down into another kiss.

"Riku I don't know…."

"Shut up."

They kissed a few more times, nothing wild and passionate, just several slow, intimate, normal kisses. When they stopped, Riku was blushing profusely and Cloud had a small smile on his face.

"I love you." Riku said softly.

"I love you too" Cloud replied.

They were about to kiss again when Cloud heard Squall's loud footsteps come into the building. They two boys were apart in a flash, Cloud on the floor and Riku on the bed. They got apart just in time as Squall walked in.

"We're getting rid of him." Squall announced.

"What??" Cloud squeaked, louder than he meant to. "What do you mean getting rid of him?"

"Riku, we're getting rid of him. He's too much trouble to keep around."

"We are not getting rid of him." Cloud countered.

"Yes we are. I will not have him stay after what happened today."

"What you mean him saving my life?"

"What?"

"You heard me, he saved my life."

"When did this happen?"

"During the fight," Riku piped up. "There was a man with a gun aimed at Cloud, I …..killed him before he could do anything."

"…."

"We're keeping him Squall. With the haul from that merchant we'll be able to afford him. I'll give up my cigarettes if you want me to."

"You're going soft Cloud." Squall replied. "Fine, but if he makes even one mistake, he's out."

"That's for me to decide. Last time I checked, Zack left me in charge of this gang, and I think it's about time I acted on it."

Squall's face darkened and he shot Riku a dirty look before he turned away from them. "One mistake." Squall countered, and then he left.

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There, the admitted their love. Hurray!

Please R&R, I love reviews!!!!


	15. Zack

-1**Title**: Dirge

**Pairing**: CloudXRiku!

**Rating**: M

**Warnings**: Yaoi , and violence, and bad language, lots of language.

**Music: **HYDE - Masquerade - 666

**Prompt**: Sin

_**Dirge: Chapter 15**_

_**Zack**_

Riku stared at the floor as Clod paced the room. "What are we going to do?" The silver teen asked. "We can't tell Squall about us. He'd go ballistic."

"I'm not entirely sure there is an "us" Riku."

"What do you mean?" Riku let his gaze wander up to the pacing blonde. "Of course there is an us, we kissed, you said you loved me. That means there is an us."

"No, it means there are complications. Don't make this go farther than it has to."

"Oh come on Cloud. Don't pull this. You and I both know this has gone too far to ignore."

"I can ignore a kiss."

"You're having second thoughts?"

Cloud paused a moment and reached into his pocket for a cigarette. He stared at the little white stick a moment, then shook his head and put it back into his pocket. "I never really had a first thought, I just blurted it out."

"So did I, but that just makes it more honest."

"I don't want to risk this Riku. Think about it, think about what you yourself said. 'How long would I survive with you dead?' Relationships are complicated out here. If one person gets hurt it can affect the survival of the other. I don't want anyone dependant on that."

"You mean like you were with Zack." Riku replied. Cloud jumped at the mention of the name and stared at Riku with a mix of disbelief and surprise.

"How…how did you know about that?"

"It's obvious Cloud, you talk about him as if he were some kind of god, and you even admitted you two were close. I can imagine how torn up you were when he died."

"Yeah well, I'm just not sure I'm ready to go through that, or put you through that."

"I never said I was going to die."

"No one ever says it, it just happens. Axel wasn't expecting to die when we went down to raid your boat, your dad wasn't expecting to die when he came to this city. You weren't expecting to get stuck out here, Sora wasn't expecting to get shot. The guard you killed wasn't expecting a sword in the stomach. Shit happens, it's unavoidable, and it comes at the worst moment. I don't want you to go through that pain if I should suddenly keel over, and vice versa."

"You can't live in fear the rest of your life."

"Why not? Fear keeps you safe, it's a warning against things that will hurt and things that are stupid."

"So you're saying a relationship would be stupid."

"You know what I mean by it."

"Yeah, I understand that you're afraid. But admit it Cloud, if either of us were to die in the next few minutes the other would be just as distraught as if we were together."

"In the next few minutes yeah, but not over time. Feelings fade after a while, it's unavoidable."

Riku shifted uncomfortably in the bed. He was upset with Cloud, but the blonde made a good point. Riku just didn't want to admit to himself that it was possible that Cloud could die.

"Is this the same speech Zack gave you?" Riku asked softly. He could tell he hit the nerve right when Cloud suddenly stiffened and looked away. "He did didn't he."

"Yeah, he did, and he died a month later." Cloud turned to look Riku in the eye. "He was right. And you know, I haven't been the same since. I don't want that to happen again. I'm sorry."

"No, I'm sorry. I'm sorry that you're so stubborn and you're too scared to take a chance. And I'm sorry I kissed you. Maybe things will be easier for you if we don't talk as much any more."

That wasn't what Cloud wanted, but he couldn't help but think that Riku was right. Things would be easier for both of them if they did stop talking and spending as much time together. But then the thought of what Riku did, back on the roof the day that Vincent came, flooded through Cloud's mind.:

_Riku looked to make sure Vincent was gone, then sat up on his knees, so that he was level with Cloud's head. Before he could convince himself that it would be stupid or sappy, he leaned forward and embraced Cloud tightly while burying his head into the blonde's neck. Riku felt Cloud stiffen at the touch, but he didn't care, he just pulled the older man closer and whispered in his ear. _

"_Emotions are a good thing, I don't care what Vincent says."_

"Cloud, I'm going to go check on Sora. When you know what it is you want talk to me. Just make sure you know before you get me ok?" Riku pulled himself off the bed and slowly walked toward the door. Cloud wanted to stop him, wanted to reach out and grab his arm, but his brain had been fried. He was no longer so certain that he wanted Riku to leave him alone. But he wasn't so sure he wanted to be with the younger boy either. Cloud was still wary of being hurt.

"I need time to think." He said, just before Riku exited the room. The boy nodded silently, then left.

Cloud sat back on the bed and stared at the ceiling, allowing one of his hands to run through his hair. As if his life wasn't complicated enough Riku had to walk in, like some sort of silver representation of his past. The boy was so much like him when he was younger. Already the teen's outlook on life had been altered permanently. Life wasn't so grand, wasn't so golden, but he still thought that happiness could be obtained, even on the outside. And he sought that happiness through Cloud. The same way Cloud had sought it from Zack.

But Zack had turned him down ruthlessly. Cloud still remembered the day when he had gone to the older man and confessed his love. He had been 20 at the time, Zack 24. He had just flat out told the older man his feelings, and his intentions. Cloud could still remember the smile that had flashed on Zack's face for a moment, before it was replaced with a serious frown. "Cloud." Zack had said. "I can't get into a relationship. I'm sorry. I know this doesn't seem fair, but some day you'll understand. The Outside is filled with nothing but loss, and I won't put you through the pain of losing a lover."

"But, Zack, you can't tell me you don't love me, I've seen the way you look at me sometimes, and the way you talk to me. You don't treat me like the others either."

"I know Cloud. I'm sorry. But you'll have to believe me. Losing a loved one is painful, but losing a over is even more so. I won't put you through that. You'll understand."

But Cloud hadn't understood, not at the time, and he'd been persistent, trying to get Zack to at least admit his love. But it all stopped a month later, when they had gotten into a vicious territory fight. The entire brawl had stopped suddenly as Zack and the leader of the other gang got involved in a pride fight. Cloud remembered watching in horror as the man he loved was cut down in front of him. Cloud hadn't taken it lightly either, in a mad dash he picked up Zack's sword and slew the man that had killed Zack. Without a leader on either side the fight broke up, and Cloud was left standing over Zack's dead body.

It had been the most painful moment of his life. Cloud had known at that moment what Zack had meant. And the pain had slowly engulfed him. On the day of Dirge, when Cloud had had to give Zack's body to the monks, he nearly punched the one monk for dumping Zack's body into the truck unceremoniously. Squall had had to restrain him so he wouldn't get shot.

The last thing Cloud wanted was to put Riku through that pain. But then again, Cloud mused, maybe it was about time he gave up on Zack, and learn to love Riku. What was that old saying? It's better to have loved and lost, then to have never loved at all? Or something like that. Maybe what he needed to do now was take the risk and love Riku.

A knock interrupted Cloud's thoughts. He looked up to see Roxas standing there, a bunch of junk in his hands. "Cloud, I need you to help me sort this stuff, I don't get any of it."

"Right, I'll be right there." Cloud replied. Roxas nodded and wandered off while Cloud got out of the bed and stretched.

'_Well_,' Cloud thought. '_I'll think about it later.'_

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I'm off vacation tomorrow so that means slower updates as I won't be sitting in front of the computer all day. It may even drop to as low as 1 chapter a day!!!! Oh the horror!!!

Anyways, I'm glad you guys are enjoying it. Please let me know how much! Or if anything seems awkward or confusing, tell me! I want to make this story good, and that means feedback! Please review!

R&R


	16. GOLD!

-1**Title**: Dirge

**Pairing**: CloudXRiku!

**Rating**: M

**Warnings**: Yaoi , and violence, and bad language, lots of language.

**Music: **HYDE -WORDS OF LOVE- 666

**Prompt**: Sin

_**Dirge: Chapter 16**_

_**GOLD!**_

The next week was filled with activity as all the healthy members of the gang sorted through the contents of the raid and estimated the value. Luckily, It had been a good haul, one o the best in a long time. They would easily be able to support everyone, giving Cloud more leverage to keep Riku. Squall didn't like it, and kept growling under his breath every time he saw the sliver-haired teen. Riku could find no reasonable explanation as to his animosity, but eventually he settled on the idea of Squall being cheap, and not wanting Riku to waste money.

Riku and Cloud seemed to avoid each other. After their little run-in, being together became awkward. During the whole week they hardly even exchanged words except when necessary. The rift between them seemed to do the most damage to Cloud, who was still trying to figure out exactly what he wanted. Riku had already made up his mind on what he wanted, and he wasn't going to waste energy worrying about it.

Everything ran smoothly for the rest of the week. Sora was already up and running around with only a minor difference in his movements, Roxas was steadily moving up in his "training", and Riku was slowly getting more and more accepted into the daily life. He was beginning to be treated, if not as an equal between all the members, at least a rookie, and it made the teen proud. Acceptance was one of his main goals now, and he was succeeding at it.

It was during one of Squall's rare shows of trust when Riku was reminded about the reason Sora and him were injured. Squall had given Sora a box of parts to take down to a vendor to try and haggle a decent price out of, and he had asked, or commanded really, Riku to guard the younger boy.

So now he and Riku were walking down the street toward one of Sora's favorite vendors. It was owned by a girl named Namine, apparently she was fairly well-off as Outsiders go. She had even managed to buy herself out of the House, and was the lead vendor on the North side. Not a transaction went on that she didn't know about. As a bonus, she was also a personal friend of Roxas, meaning she gave better prices for merchandise.

Unlike the other vendors in the area, she had an actual shop, instead of selling her wares on a blanket in the street she sold straight from her house. It was a real advantage, and made her market the hub of wealth in the area. And because her shop was on the edge of town, near the waterway, she sometimes got merchants in her shop looking to make a trade on the black market.

Sora explained all these things to Riku on the way to her shop. He also told the older boy to be careful if he ever got into an argument over the price of an item with her. Namine was notorious for getting a better price on things than was fair.

When Riku finally approached her shop he was surprised to find it actually had a sign, and a large, _metal_ door. Riku had seen other houses along the streets with doors, but they had all been made of wood. The metal door on her shop marked Namine as a wealthy Outsider indeed.

"Can you open the door for me?" Sora asked. "My hands are kind of full…"

"Huh? Oh right." Riku grabbed the handle and opened the door for his friend, then stepped inside behind the younger boy. The inside was lit through a hole in the roof that had a kind of blanket-tent over it, to keep out the rain and direct sunlight. The effect was that the room was well-lit and inviting.

Inside the room were 4 men talking among themselves in the corner. They all had the barcode tattoo on their arm, just below the bicep, and 2 of the men had lines through theirs, one red, and one blue.

"See that guy? The one with the red line?" Sora whispered. Riku nodded slowly. "He got thrown out here for murder."

Riku felt a shiver form at the base of his spine, but soon let it pass as he remembered that he too, had killed a man. "What about the blue one?" Riku asked a little too loudly, causing some of the men to glance in his direction.

"I think blue means fraud." Sora replied, not at all intimidated by the looks they were getting.

"Fraud? I didn't think you could get thrown out here for fraud."

"Depends on the severity of the crime." A woman's voice replied from behind Riku. The teen whirled to find himself face to face with a girl not too much older than him, with sun-bleached hair and a smile on her lips.

"Namine!" Sora called. "Good to see you. You know, this box is heavy, think I can put it down somewhere while we talk business?"

"Right this way Sora, and make sure you ring your friend, he's kind of cute." Namine winked at Riku as she walked past the boys and into a back room. Riku immediately felt his cheeks flush. He had never been hit on by a girl before, at least, not one as pretty as Namine.

"Don't take that personally." Sora chuckled as he say Riku's face light up. "She said that to me too, and my brother. And Cloud, and Squall."

"Yeah but have you noticed how good-looking all the guys in the gang are?" Riku asked.

"Hmm? No not really." Sora replied. "Why? Are we?"

"Uh…" Riku didn't know how to respond. Had he been the only one to notice? Maybe it had something to do with his attraction to Cloud, he had begun to notice the features of all the gang members.

"You can set the box down over there." Namine interrupted. Riku silently thanked her for the distraction as Sora deposited the box on a wood table in the right side of the room.

"Now then…Sora, you need to introduce me to this handsome young man," Namine chirped.

"Oh right. Namine, this is Riku, Cloud adopted him off of Ansem a little over a month ago."

"A month? Has it been over a month since you last came to see me already? I'm beginning to think that you guys don't like me any more."

"Well, we've been busy…" Riku tried to add helpfully.

"Is that so?" Namine replied, eyeing them over carefully. "Well I would guess that would be true, seeing as how you two got torn up by Tidus and his thugs."

Riku blinked and let his mouth fall open. "How did you know about that?"

"I know everything." Namine replied as she walked over and inspected the box that Sora had set down on the table. "Now Sora, what all do you have for me today?"

"Hover transport parts, a small generator, and some general electric parts." Sora replied immediately, pointing out the items as he listed them. Namine picked up the generator and weighed it in her hand, then flipped it on to make sure it worked.

"How much?" she asked as she continued to inspect the object.

"60 gold" Sora replied.

"80 gold" Riku countered eliciting an open-mouthed stare from Sora and a glance from Namine. "And 10 silver."

"65." Namine shot back, but Riku shook his head.

"78 and 5 silver."

"68 and 3 silver."

"75 and 4"

"71 and 2."

"75, that's our final offer." Riku replied. His face betrayed nothing, and he stared Namine in the eye.

"Fine, 75." she replied, holding her hand out to Riku. They shook hands and Namine examined him a little more closely. "You're a sharp boy aren't you?"

"A merchant's brat." Riku replied, smiling mischievously.

"Well, I like that. Too many people just take any price they can get. It's been ages since I've had someone haggle with me like that, and now I get to be mad at you for cheating me out of 15 gold."

Sora just stared at his friend, his mouth still hanging open. At Riku's glance though he quickly closed it. Namine went back to rummaging in the box.

Riku ended up selling all but a few of their wares to Namine, all at a higher price than Sora would have sold them for originally. When they left the shop, they were carrying a full purse.

"Wow, what a haul." Sora chirped as he weighed the bag of money in his hands. "I don't think we've ever gotten so much money from one transaction. Squall's going to be pleased."

"Say, Sora." Riku started. "How much money did you say you needed for Kairi?"

"Oh um…only 1 more gold….why?"

Riku gently took the purse from Sora and reached into it, pulling two shiny gold pieces from within. "Take it." he said, holding the pieces out to Sora. The younger boy looked from the money to Riku's face, as if expecting him to be joking.

"You…you can't mean that." Sora choked. "That's not right, that's everyone's gold, I can't just take it."

"Oh come on Sora, we got off with a lot more than we expected to. They aren't going to miss two gold pieces."

"I dunno…" Sora responded, eyeing the shiny pieces of metal appreciatively. "I only need one…"

"I know you only get one per raid, that's what? One gold piece a month? I know you've lost your paycheck for quite some time to give to Kairi. Here, just take it, nothing bad will happen ok?"

"I dunno…"

"Oh come on and take it."

"Alright," Sora conceded, taking the two coins and shoving them into his pocket. "Thanks …."

"Don't worry about it." Riku replied, giving his friend a pat on the back. "Besides, you've earned it."

"Thanks Riku…do you think we can go back to the East side after we get these things back? The sooner I get this money to Kairi the better I'll feel."

"Sure, I'll try to convince Cloud to let us go."

"Do you think he will though? Especially after what happened last time."

"I think I might be able to convince him." Riku responded. "Don't worry, everything will be fine."

"Ok."

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Why is it every time someone says "Everything will be fine" Something screws up? Sorry, just something I happened to notice in this story. Anyways, there is a little foreshadowing for you. I've gotten back into the groove, writing actual paragraphs instead of just dialogue, I was staring to worry I'd forgotten how to write….Anyways! Review! Please! I love to hear from you guys.

R&R


	17. Uke

-1**Title**: Dirge

**Pairing**: CloudXRiku!

**Rating**: M

**Warnings**: Yaoi , and violence, and bad language, lots of language.

**Music: **LArcenCiel - Living in your eyes

**Prompt**: Sin

_**Dirge: Chapter 17**_

_**Uke**_

"Cloud? …….Cloud!"

The blonde was sitting in the storage room, a huge pile of junk surrounding him He had been sorting through the various items and prepping them for sale, when he had…..fallen asleep.

Riku rolled his eyes as he examined the scene in front of him. Cloud was snoozing away, his back leaning against a small pile of boxes. The position couldn't have been comfortable, but that didn't stop the blonde from just falling asleep on the job.

"Cloud!" Riku shouted again, this time right in the older man's ear. Cloud's form shuddered visibly as he suddenly jumped, knocking over the pile of boxes he had been leaning on. Riku simply laughed.

"What the hell was that for?" Cloud growled as Riku helped him stand up from the pile.

"You shouldn't have been asleep." Riku countered. "At least I was doing my job."

Cloud glared back. "At least you get to move, Squall has had me locked in this tiny room for the last couple hours."

"I thought you said you were going to assume your role as leader?" Riku remarked snidely, earning a glower from Cloud.

"Shut it." The blonde replied. "I'm still in charge."

"You're uke and you know it."

Cloud had Riku pinned to the wall before the teen could bat an eyelash. "Want to run that by me again?" He hissed in the younger boy's ear. Riku shuddered visibly.

"I thought you weren't interested."

"I'm not uke." Cloud replied smoothly, evading any chance Riku had of changing the subject. The older man suddenly backed off, letting Riku slide down against the wall, his heart pounding. "Did you come in here to tease me or to say something? If it's the first, you can go."

Riku glared at Cloud's back and stood up, trying to get his wildly thumping heart to calm down. " I needed to ask a favor. Can Sora and I go down the East side?"

"The East side?" Cloud paused a moment as if to think about it, then shook his head. "No."

"Oh come on."

"You remember what happened last time." The blonde replied in a growl. "I'm not gonna have you two come back torn up, or dead."

"We promise to be careful, nothing will happen."

"What do you want to go down there for anyways? I know it's not for the House there, unless you've given up on me that fast. So what is it?" Cloud had a touch of bitterness in his voice, especially when he was referring to Riku's interest. The tone didn't go unnoticed by the silver-haired teen.

"Sora wants to see someone, I promised to go with him."

"Does this someone happen to be a girl?" Cloud asked.

Riku hesitated. "Well, yes…"

"I knew it." Cloud responded. "Fine, he can go, and so can you."

"Yes! Thank you Cloud you won't regret this…"

"No I won't, because I'm coming along. Not even Tidus would attack me."

Riku's smile suddenly fell. "Why do you have to come?" he asked. "Won't Squall get mad?"

"Fuck Squall." Cloud replied. "I'm not uke. I'll do what I want." When Riku tried to protest, Cloud cut him off. "Don't even bother saying no Riku. I'm going, that's all there is to it.

Cloud was pissed. The little comment Riku had made had struck a nerve. The last thing the teen wanted was to make Cloud more upset, he'd just have to break the news to Sora. Cloud was coming with them.

"When can we leave?" Riku asked quietly.

"Well when do you want to leave? Today? I don't know how much time we have till sundown, but we should be able to make a round trip without a problem…"

Riku thought about it. "I'll go ask Sora, he's the one who wants to go."

The older blonde nodded and waved Riku off. "Go ahead, I have a few more things I need to inventory. Come back and tell me when you guys want to go. And don't try to sneak off without me."

"Wouldn't dream of it." Riku replied, rolling his eyes. The teen exited the room, leaving Cloud alone with the boxes and piles of junk. Carefully the blonde set down the piece of machine he had been holding and stared at the box sadly.

"I'm not uke…am I?" he asked the pile of junk. It didn't seem to have an answer. Sighing, Cloud leaned back against the wall and stared at the ceiling for a few minutes. His icy blue eyes searching it, as if for some enlightenment. "I wish I knew what to do."

"Well you can start by leaving. Sora and Riku are already getting ready to go." Cloud turned to see Roxas standing in the doorway, a smug smirk on his face. "Riku sent me to tell you. He said you might be in a pissy mood, so be careful."

"Do I sound pissy to you?" Cloud snapped. Roxas's grin only widened.

"Yeah." he replied.

Grumbling, Cloud got up from his position against the wall and pushed past the younger teen. "Shut up."

Before Cloud could completely leave the room, Roxas held out an arm to stop him. "Hey Cloud…do you know what Wednesday is?"

"Yeah, it's Dirge, why?"

"Well, it's also September 21, Riku's birthday."

Cloud pulled up short and shot a strange glance toward Roxas. "How did you know that?" he asked.

"I heard Riku talking to Sora about it the other day. Not that he wants anything. He specifically told Sora that if he got him anything, he'd beat him to a pulp."

"Why are you telling me this?" Cloud asked quietly. Roxas only smiled again.

"I dunno, I thought you might like to get him something. It will be his first birthday away from his parents, and I know he thinks highly of you."

"You hang around Namine too much, you're starting to sound like her." The older blonde replied. "I suggest you keep your nose in your own business."

"He likes jewelry." Roxas replied, before walking away from Cloud. The older man simply stared after him, letting the message sink in. Did Roxas know about the half-formed relationship between him and the silver-haired teen? But then again, how could he? Even thinking about it was beginning to make Cloud's head hurt.

"Hey Cloud, are you ready yet or are we going to leave without you?" Riku yelled from the doorway to the room that lead to the roof.

Cloud looked up and shook his head, letting his thoughts settle. So Riku liked jewelry? He could imagine it, the boy did have the kind of looks that would look good with some jewelry, especially silver. Maybe he could find something simple from Namine, something inexpensive that Squall wouldn't yell at him for getting…

"Hurry up!"

"Coming!" Cloud responded.

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Sorry it took so long to update, several things happened.

1. I got my PS2 back , which means I finally got to start playing KH1. I had the game, but then lost the PS2 and couldn't play it. So for the last 4 days I've been playing KH and just beat it an hour ago.

2. My uncle died, which means I have a funeral to go to in California. I'll be gone Thursday thru Sunday, so don't expect any updates until Monday at the earliest, unless I update tomorrow.

Other than that I hope you're liking this so far.

R&R!


	18. Sick

-1**Title**: Dirge

**Pairing**: CloudXRiku!

**Rating**: M

**Warnings**: Yaoi , and violence, and bad language, lots of language.

**Music: **LArcenCiel - Driver's High

**Prompt**: Sin

**A/N: I REDID THIS CHAPTER, SO IF YOU THINK YOU'VE ALREADY READ IT, YOU HAVN'T READ ALL OF IT! PLEASE KEEP READING TO GET THE WHOLE THING!**

_**Dirge: Chapter 18**_

_**Sick**_

The group made it to the East side in one piece and without any problems. Sora complained about Cloud accompanying them at first, but he stopped after the first few minutes, after all, it's not like he could chase Cloud off by complaining about him.

Instead of getting off on the roof they had jumped off before, Sora led them to a different building, a taller one. Centered in the middle of the roof was a cement staircase leading down into the building and on the opening was a metal door that could be shut and locked from the inside. It was a strange structure for anyone to have on the Outside, and Riku figured the owner of the building had to be rich, much like Namine.

"Where are we?" Riku asked as they approached the staircase. Cloud only smiled at him.

"You haven't been to a House yet have you?"

"A House?" Riku's eyes widened in surprise and he took a step back from the building's entrance. "I'm not going in there."

"Oh come on Riku!" Sora piped up. "It's not as if it's going to kill you."

"The Houses are the main form of entertainment out here, you're gong to have to enter one sooner or later." Cloud continued as he grabbed Riku's hand and began forcing the teen down the steps. After a few awkward moments of almost falling, Riku gave up and let himself be swept into the House.

The inside of the building smelled, no, _reeked_ of sex and cheap perfume. 20 or so people were stuffed into the confined space of the common room, where the stairs led down to. At the base of the steps was a table where a young man in a long black coat was sitting in a chair, half-asleep. Cloud walked over to the man and thumped his hand on the table, causing the dozing youth to jump awake and fall on his ass.

"C-can I help you?" he yelped as he picked himself off the floor, straightening when he noted the three people in front of him.

"We want in." Cloud responded, jerking his thumb in the direction of the two boys behind him, the young man behind the counter only nodded.

"5 coppers each admittance fee."

"We won't be long, I'm just here to see one person." Sora interrupted as he squeezed his way past Cloud.

"Doesn't matter, if you have any business in the House, it's five coppers."

"But-"

"Five coppers."

Riku walked forward and placed a small coin on the table, pushing it toward the young man. "One silver piece that you can keep, and we all get in for a few minutes to take care of business. Then we get out and no one's the wiser."

The young man's eyes seemed to grow larger than dinner plates at the gleam of the coin on the table. He didn't want to take it, if he was caught it could cost him all his money, and possibly his life, but then again a silver was worth a week's worth of work, and they were only going in for a few minutes…

"Deal." he replied, snatching the coin away quickly before anyone else could see. "But make it quick."

Riku Cloud and Sora all walked past into the main room of the building. Nearly 10 men were sitting around, either at small tables or wooden benches, and most had a boy or girl partner of varying ages on their laps or engaging in sexual behavior. A few were just talking, while others were on the verge of having sex right there in the middle of the room. Riku found the scene repulsive as well as a little erotic. The House employees were almost all exceptionally good-looking, if a little dirty. Most of the patrons were not.

Sora abandoned the group to walk down another flight of steps. At the bottom he grabbed the arm of a man in his early 20's, talking to him in a hushed voice. Riku hadn't noticed the absence of his friend, as he was too busy gawking at a pair of girls who were making out, he couldn't tell which was the customer and which the servant, but the scene was exotic and arousing to him nonetheless.

"I'm going to go check on Sora." Cloud said. Riku didn't hear him, but waved him off anyways, he was too entranced by the scene before him. Cloud took the gesture as a sign of acknowledgement, and proceeded to head down the stairs to talk with Sora.

As Cloud neared he caught pieces of Sora's argument with the older man. "What do you mean she's with a client? She's pregnant!"

"I'm sorry Sora, but that's where she is, and you know the rules, no one can disturb someone who's with a client."

"Who's the client Marluxia?"

"Um…" the older am bit his lip and shook his head. "I uh…am not at liberty to say?"

"Tell me…"

"You aren't going to like this…."

"Who is it?"

"Um……Ti-" A crash interrupted Marluxia's words, causing both Cloud and Sora to look up to the second floor. One of the tables had been knocked over, and near it, pinned against the wall, was Riku.

An old, bald, ugly man had the younger boy pinned to the wall with one hand on the silver-haired teen's crotch. Riku looked pissed as hell and tried to struggle against the older man, but the older man had an advantage in size and strength, not to mention he was squeezing Riku's crotch rather hard. Riku could smell the alchohol on his breath as he whispered: "Come on….I'll pay you good…"

"Let go of me!" Riku choked, fighting the terror and bile rising in his throat.

Cloud was there in a flash, his hand on Riku's attacker's wrist. He squeezed hard, pressing the right pressure points to make the man's hand open and release Riku. Before the bald man could yelp, Cloud had his hand secured behind his back and a knife to the man's throat. "Touch him again and I'll kill you."

"Hey…what….what are you doing? Let me go!"

"Cloud! What the fuck are you doing? Let go of him!" Marluxia bounded up the stairs behind the blonde and grabbed his arm, as if he could restrain Cloud so easily. Cloud responded with a sharp glare.

"Come on Cloud…just let him go. I'll kick him out now, just, don't kill him ok?"

By this time the entire room was watching the scene before them. Cloud had a murderous glint in his eye, with a knife to the man's throat. The man was shaking, scared into sobriety by Cloud's actions, and, behind it all, sat Riku, who was huddled up, his arms around his legs, shivering at the thought of being touched in such a way. It had felt so…wrong.

"Give me one good reason why I shouldn't kill you." Cloud hissed in the bald man's ear, causing his eyes to roll up in terror.

"No…don't…kill me….I'm…I'm an Insider! I can prove it! You kill me, and I'll have the entire security force in here to kill you and your little pet off!"

Cloud hesitated. He hadn't expected anything like that, and though he normally wouldn't have hesitated to ignore the plea, something struck home in him. It, for some odd reason, reminded him of Riku.

Cloud dropped the man and shoved his knife into his pocket. As he turned to help Riku up, he caught a glimmer out of the corner of his eye. The glimmer of a drawn weapon. He glanced up, expecting to see the bald man with a knife or some such thing, but was surprised to see Tidus standing there, his sword drawn.

"What are you doing in my territory Cloud?" he growled.

"I could ask you the same question Tidus, seeing as how this is part of my territory."

"Excuse me?" the boy laughed. "I don't think so. I thought I taught you bitches that when you got your asses kicked last time."

"You lost that match!" Sora growled. "Riku won! You just turned around and shot at us like a coward an-" Sora was cut off by a warning growl from Tidus.

"Get out."

"I don't think so, not until we finish our business." Cloud turned away from Tidus, the ultimate insult in terms of fighting, it was as if he was telling Tidus he wasn't a threat, and squatted down by Riku. "You ok?" he asked quietly. Riku shook his head.

"He kissed me, and…he touched me… I….I feel sick…"

"Hey! Asshole! Face me!" Tidus's voice seemed to fade in the background as Cloud focused on Riku's fragile form. All he seemed to care about was easing the revoltion that was spreading through the youth's body.

Cloud reached out a hand and set it on Riku's head, gently rubbing the silver hair. "It's okay Riku."

"No!" Riku growled, jerking his head away from Cloud's touch. "It's not ok, I…I feel sick…."

A shadow and a yelp from Sora alerted Cloud to Tidus moving right behind him. He whirled to find the younger man jumping at him, ready to slash with his sword. In one smooth move, Cloud dodged the attack and slammed Tidus in the spine, knocking him to the ground with a dull thud. Before the younger blonde could move, Cloud was on him, kicking the weapon away and pulling the boy up by his collar.

"Get the hell out before I get mad." Cloud growled. Ansem slinked his way over to Cloud and gently put his hand on the blonde's arm.

"Let him go Cloud." Ansem ordered softly.

"Why should I?" the blonde replied, venom dripping from every word. "I'll kill him."

"You wouldn't dare." Tidus spat.

"Wouldn't I?"

"Just let him go Cloud…I want to go home…" Riku stood slowly, edging his way toward the older man hesitantly. Cloud cast him a asking glance.

"I'm going to settle this-"

"Please Cloud?"

The look in Riku's eyes was enough to win the older man over. Frowning, he dropped Tidus to the ground and pinned him to the floor with his foot. "Come anywhere near me or my boys again and I'll slice off your balls and shove 'em down your throat, you got that?"

"Running away?" Tidus squeaked as Cloud's shoe pushed harder on his ribcage.

"Not a chance," and with that, Cloud turned away, wrapping his arm around Riku's waist and nodding for Sora to follow.

"Should we just leave him in there?" Sora questioned as they reached the top of the building. He was nervously rubbing his hand through his hair and looking in all directions, as if expecting to be attacked.

"He won't hurt us, I'll deal with him. Sora, from now on, you can't come down here, and neither can anyone else. I'm pulling everyone out of the East side." Cloud pulled Riku a little closer to him, letting their bodies touch for a moment, then slid his hand to the teen's back. "I'm not going to have another gang war on our hands."

"But-"

"No buts. Zack made the mistake of trying to control the whole Outside, I'm not going to do that, I want as few people killed as possible. You stay away from here, I don't care what your reasons are."

Sora looked to Riku pleadingly, as if asking for some kind of backup in the argument, but Riku only shook his head slightly and averted his gaze. "Aren't you going to say anything?" Sora demanded.

"I just want to go home." Riku whispered back, pressing closer against Cloud, his protection.

Tears welled up in Sora's eyes and he backed up away from the two people in front of him. "You ass! I thought you were my friend!"

"But Sor-"

"Shut up!" Sora rubbed the tears from his eyes angrily and bolted out across the roof-planks in the direction of home, leaving Cloud and Riku standing alone on the House roof.

"Don't take what he say's literally…" Cloud said softly, gently patting Riku's head with his free hand. "He's just upset…"

"I don't care." Riku replied as he laid his hands on the one Cloud had placed around him. "I just want to go home. We never should have come out here."

"You're mad about…"

"No. You saved me, I'm glad. I just….well, I've never been attacked like that before. I'm just a little…"

"Shocked?"

"I guess."

"He didn't hurt you did he?…"

"No…"

"Good…"

"Cloud?"

"Hmm?"

"This…is all going to turn out ok right?. Sora will calm down, the gang will stay together, you'll be able to keep me….right?"

"Everything will be fi-"

"Don't say it. When you say it bad things happen, just….just say yes…"

Cloud hesitated a moment, staring down at the boy who seemed so strong at times, yet so fragile at others. He was a strange young man, and he caused so many mixed emotions. Cloud couldn't help but notice how different he seemed now from when they'd first met. His aqua eyes didn't seem so innocent, his skin not quite so smooth. When he'd come, he'd been like a china doll, but now, he'd been sandblasted by the dirt streets of the Outside, but that didn't make him seem any less precious. Like a buried treasure.

Suddenly, Cloud felt like taking a risk, felt like he wanted, no, _needed_ to be closer to this strange boy who had stirred up old emotions.

Cloud grabbed onto Riku's shirt and pulled the younger man close, so that he was pressed against his chest. "Yes…" he said, hugging Riku as close to him as he could. "Yes, I promise. I won't let anything bad happen, I won't let anyone go. Alright? _Anyone."_

Riku grabbed at the fabric of Cloud's shirt, bunching it up in his clenched hands. Dimly he was aware of tears streaming form his eyes and landing on the dirt-streaked shirt, staining the grains and turning them dark.

"I'm sorry," he whispered, and though Cloud didn't know why, he didn't question. He just held him tighter.

"I'm sorry too."

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Revised chapter, I'm in a better mood. So ….yea…..

No more slitting people's throats!

Please R&R

PS: **Page of Cups : **for some reason, the stupid site isn't letting me review or send PM's to you. It doesn't like me. So if I don't review or talk to you much, that would be why.


	19. Birthday Present

-1**Title**: Dirge

**Pairing**: CloudXRiku!

**Rating**: M

**Warnings**: Yaoi , and violence, and bad language, lots of language.

**Music: **LArcenCiel - Existence

**Prompt**: Sin

**A/N: If you have not read the updated version of the last chapter please do, otherwise you won't understand this one.**

_**Dirge: Chapter 19**_

_**Birthday Present**_

"You guys are late," Squall growled as Cloud and Riku stepped in from the roof. Riku threw him a dirty look before shoving past him and heading toward their room. Squall raised his eyebrow at this and looked to Cloud for an answer. The blonde simply shrugged and walked by without answering.

"Not going to say anything? You know, Sora came in here crying, won't talk to anyone, not even Roxas….what happened out there?"

"It has nothing to do with you." Cloud replied, fishing through his pockets for a cigarette. He finally found one and popped it into his mouth.

"What do you mean it has nothing to do with me? I'm part of this group too and-"

"Shut up Squall. Seriously, you don't have to be in the middle of everything that goes on. I'll clue you in if I think you need to know, until then, stop acting like you've got a stick up your ass and calm down."

"What the hell are you talking about? You're the one with a stick up your ass! Ever since you brought back that fucking kid you've been doing nothing but acting like a total ass!"

"Riku has nothing to do with this, I-"

"You just want to take back what's yours right? You just want to take over the gang like Zack meant for you to. Well I say screw Zack. It's because of me that you're here; I'm the one that found you and rescued you from that hellhole you were in. I'm the one who was here first, this gang is as much mine as it is yours, in fact, it's mostly mine. You're just a whore from the House with a vision of grandeur. Don't get cocky just because you're wearing the pants around here."

"And I think you better shut the hell up before you find yourself out on the street without any clothes and without any balls."

"You can't just suddenly decide to take over this group. Power doesn't work that way Cloud. You can't just all the sudden be mister mach

"And neither can you. If you want to fight come to me any time, I'm ready and waiting."

The two males stared at each other, not willing to say any more or make a move. The tension in the room could have been cut with a knife. Cloud knew this argument would have come eventually, Leon was constantly trying to take control, and sometimes Cloud worried about betrayal, but then again, family was thicker than that, and they _were_ a family, no matter how mismatched they were.

Leon was the first to leave. He turned from Cloud, his eyes not leaving the blonde's until the very last second, and slipped out the door. Cloud stared at the spot he had been standing in for a few more moments, then shook his head and puffed out a ring of smoke from his cigarette. "Don't kill me Squall, I'm just doing my part…," he mumbled to the empty air.

--------------------------

Three days passed before the words Roxas had said to Cloud came floating back to his mind. The 21st. Dirge. Riku's birthday.

Cloud sat up in the bed and yawned. Today was Riku's birthday. The feisty newcomer had turned 17. Running a hand through his hair, Cloud searched the room with bleary eyes. Riku had left already, his pile of blankets in the corner were folded neatly and pushed to the side, out of the way. Squall slept soundly next to Cloud.

Cloud made a disgruntled noise in the back of his throat and forced himself to get up. Careful not to disturb the chocolate-haired man next to him, he slipped from the bed and headed toward the roof. As he reached the top, he could just begin to hear the chant of the monks in the distance.

Riku sat on the edge of the roof, his feet dangling down into the street below. Cloud noted the difference in his body structure. Riku seemed ganglier, taller, and more defined. It was a complete contrast to the struggling, defiant boy he had first met.

Without saying a word, Cloud walked over and sat down next to the silver haired teen. Riku didn't even bother to look at him.

"Today's Dirge." Riku stated. Cloud nodded in response.

"Yeah."

"It seems strange, how I've gotten used to the life out here."

"Yeah."

"…Do you think that one day, the monks will come for my body too?"

Cloud paused at this, considering the question carefully. "I think that the monks eventually come for everyone. We all die Riku, weather we are Insiders or Outsiders."

"You were an Insider once, and so was I. Does the time seem to go faster out here? I mean, it's been so long since I've come here, and already…already…"

"You're 17."

Riku nodded, not bothering to ask Cloud how he knew about his birthday. Instead, he just leaned to the side, resting his head on Cloud's shoulder. Cloud didn't object.

They sat like that for a while, just listening to the wind and the far-off chant of the monks. As the time pasted, the soothing chant grew louder, until Riku spotted the procession several blocks away. The hydrolicized cart made virtually no sound as bodies were piled in. Riku noticed that the monks were careful not to let the carcasses touch their bodies. Instead, Outsiders were required to put their own dead on the cart, piled haphazardly and at weird angles.

"Riku, maybe we should go in…" Cloud started, but Riku didn't budge, he only watched as the cart moved forward, the low humming of the engine barely audible over the chanting of the monks.

When they were gone, Cloud searched Riku's eyes for some show of emotion. He found none.

"When I die," Riku started, finally lifting his eyes off the street below. "When I die, promise me you'll bury me, and not put me on that cart."

It was a strange request, but Cloud didn't respond. Instead, he simply pulled Riku up by the arm and looked him in the eye. "Come on," he said. "I have a birthday present for you."

--------------------------

They made their way across the rooftops, careful to not go anywhere near the monks. Cloud didn't want Riku thinking about death, not on his birthday. This was a happy celebration, one that should be enjoyed, not spent mourning for the dead.

Eventually Cloud led Riku to Naminè's shop. They were greeted by the cheerful shop-owner immediately, as if she had expected them to come, which of course, she had.

"Riku! Cloud! Good to see you. I bet you're looking for a birthday present aren't you? Don't worry about a thing; I've already pulled out my best stuff, just for you to browse through. Now, don't worry, I know you're on a budget, though with that extra gold Riku got you I'm sure you could spend a little extra, but anyways, my stuff is all priced fairly, and I think you'll like it."

"Actually…" Cloud interrupted, scratching the back of his neck. "I was thinking…of something simpler…"

"Simpler?" Naminè asked, incredulous. "Simpler like what?"

Well…I was wondering if…." at this, he motioned her closer, so he could whisper in her ear.

She blinked in surprise and stepped back, looking at Cloud with a new air of appreciation. "Are you sure?" she asked.

Cloud nodded, ignoring the questioning glances Riku was throwing at him. Naminè only nodded her consent and left the room for a moment.

"Where is she going?" Riku asked. Cloud only smiled.

"Don't worry about it; I think you'll like this gift."

Naminè returned a moment later, carrying a small faded out black box. She blew a thick layer of dust off it and patted it down before handing it to Cloud reverently. "I never thought you'd do something like this…You must really love him."

Both Cloud and Riku blushed at Naminè's remark. "Now Naminè, don't go saying things about people. Rumors aren't good you know."

"I've got it.' she replied, winking at Cloud. "Don't worry, you're secret is safe with me."

"That's not what I mea-"

"What's in the box?" Riku interrupted.

Both Naminè and Cloud looked at him as if he was crazy, but Cloud was the first to recover. "Right um…" He hesitated, scanning Riku's face, then he led the younger boy over to a chair in the corner of the room. "Go ahead and sit down… tell me, are you afraid of needles?"

"No…why?"

"Good…"

Riku was confused by the strange behavior that both Cloud and Naminè were exhibiting, but he didn't give too much thought to it. After all, he didn't know much about them anyways.

Cloud walked away and came back a few moments later holding a strange looking hand-held machine. He walked right over to Riku and knelt in front of him, checking some thing in the machine. After a few clicks he seemed to be satisfied, and held the machine up to Riku's ear, pinching the flesh between two metal bars. "Hold still," he commanded.

"What?" Riku started to ask, but he was cut off as a quick sharp pain came from his ear. "Ow! Dammit, what are you doing?"

Cloud sat back, seemingly satisfied with his work, and held up a mirror. Hanging in Riku's left ear was a heavy silver wolf with a ring in its mouth. The pair to the one that Cloud wore in his ear.

"They were Zack's." Cloud told him. "Both of them, I took one from him when he died, this one Naminè's been holding onto. I wanted you to have it but, you're ears weren't pierced."

Riku fingered the silver treasure hanging in his ear. It was an unfamiliar weight, but it was minor, over time he'd get used to it.

"What makes you think I want an earring?" Riku asked, looking Cloud in the eyes.

"Because I know you, and besides, that's only half your present. The other half is that I've considered what I want, and I think you're right, I can't just ignore the feelings I have, weather they are for better or worse. Just promise me, if I die while you're still here, you'll bury me, and won't put me on that cart."

"Stop talking about death moron." Riku choked, Cloud was alarmed to see tears starting in his eyes. "You're not going to die." Riku bent forward and hugged Cloud around the neck. The position they were sitting in it was awkward and the almost fell over, but neither of them cared. All they knew was, even though it was Dirge, Death Song, the day of the dead, they were happy, if only for a moment.

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Hey guys, sorry it took so long for me to post. I've been in the middle of finals, depression, heatstroke, and a few other things. Life sucks. Anyways, I should update soon if this heatstroke business doesn't kill me, I haven't been able to eat anything or drink anything for the past 32 hours and I feel horrible. I'm amazed I stayed awake long enough to write this.

I'm also going to start on another story called _The Brothers of Rome_but I'm having problems trying to translate that title into Latin, if you can help me, please do.

And don't worry, this story will take precedence over the new one, I won't abandon this one because I have a great plan for where this little love-fest between Riku and Cloud is going, and it won't be pretty. But who can expect anything different from angst eh? Oh well.

Please go ahead and R&R, a review might make me feel a little better and make me stop puking.


	20. Kiss in the Dark

-1**Title**: Dirge

**Pairing**: CloudXRiku!

**Rating**: M

**Warnings**: Yaoi , and violence, and bad language, lots of language.

**Music: **Meant to Live: Switchfoot

**Prompt**: Sin

_**Dirge: Chapter 20**_

_**Kiss in the dark**_

"Well…we still have several hours of birthday left, what do you want to do with it?" Cloud asked as they walked through the blanket that served as a door to their house.

"Hmmm…I dunno, I've never had a boyfriend before. What do you want to do?"

Cloud chuckled and patted Riku on the head. "I'll tell you when you're older. Until then, how about we just cuddle up in the storage room?" 

"Cuddle up or make-out?"

"Both."

Riku grinned and started to walk toward the storage room. "So you'll tell me when I'm older huh? What, do I have to wait a whole 'nother year to find out?"

"To make it legal then yeah, you do."

"I thought you were the one who made the laws…or at least, that's what you told me when you found me."

"You still remember that line?" Cloud asked as he followed Riku into the storage room. He shut the door behind him and locked it, so that no one else would walk in on them. Riku saw this and raised an eyebrow.

"You planning on raping me or something? That's a little unnecessary."

Cloud simply shrugged and made his way over to a pile of blankets in the corner. "Just thought you'd like the privacy, you know, wouldn't want anyone to walk in on us." He grinned and plopped down on the dusty blankets, choking when a cloud of dust poofed up around him. Riku laughed.

"Hey, stop …..cough…..laughing!" Cloud growled as he tried to swat the dust away. All his movements did was make it swirl more in the air.

"I can't help it!" Riku grinned, walking over and plopping himself right into Cloud's lap. "It's funny!"

"It wasn't that funny…" Cloud replied, crossing his arms in mock anger.

"Oh come on…." Riku pouted. He flipped himself over in Cloud's lap so that he was resting against the older man's chest and looking up into his eyes. "Stop pouting like that."

Cloud tried to ignore him, but he slowly found his eyes wandering down to the boy on his lap. When he did look, he was taken in by the pathetic puppy eyes that Riku was giving him. "Hey…stop that…it's not fair…"

Riku didn't respond, only continued to stare at him, finally, Cloud became so unnerved that he sighed and wrapped his arms around Riku's lithe form. "I can't even pretend to stay mad at you can I?"

Chuckling, Riku hugged Cloud back warmly. "Nope, I'm too adorable."

"You aren't that adorable."

"Yes I am."

"…"

At the lack of response, Riku looked up at Cloud, only to see he man looking at him fondly. "What?" he asked, pulling back slightly. "Do I have something on my face?"

"No…" Cloud replied, leaning down to nuzzle the younger boy's neck. "Just admiring is all…"

Riku squirmed and tried to push Cloud away playfully, but just as he was about to push, he felt Cloud's lips on his neck. Immediately heat rushed to his face, making his cheeks burn with embarrassment. "Cloud…"

"Shhh…" the blonde replied. One of his hands moved up to the back of Riku's neck and began to rub lazy affectionate circles across the skin. Cloud kissed Riku's neck a few more times, moving from the bottom of his neck to his chin. Each touch made Riku shiver slightly, his eyes slowly closing until Cloud's lips met his own in a soft sweet kiss. Riku's arms moved on their own to wrap around Cloud's neck gently as they kissed again and finally a third time. The whole time Riku felt his cheeks get redder and hotter.

The third kiss lasted just a tad longer than the others. Neither of them wanted to stop, and it was Cloud who acted first, letting his tongue touch on the edge of Riku's lips, asking permission. Riku obliged by opening his lips, gasping slightly at the strange feel of Cloud's tongue entering his mouth. He was so startled he pulled back, breaking the kiss and opening his eyes in surprise. Cloud just looked down at him, smiling slightly.

Riku looked away in embarrassment. "S-sorry…" he said. "I just…"

"It's alright, you're nervous. Don't worry about it, I'll go as slow as you want." Cloud replied, rubbing Riku's neck with his fingers some more. Riku looked back up at him, his eyes determined.

"I want to try that again…" Cloud nodded and moved down, hesitating just above Riku's lips, then kissing him sweetly. Riku re-wrapped his arms around his neck, and waited for Cloud to try it again.

Cloud's tongue came a little slower this time, moving into his mouth slowly, ghosting over Riku's own tongue and then moving on to explore the various parts of his mouth. After a few moments, Riku started to panic, what was he supposed to do? Just sit there?

Cloud answered that for him, his tongue flicked Riku's up, forcing it to move. After a few seconds Riku got the idea and began to push his tongue against Cloud's, letting the older man set the pace. Riku heard a small breathy moan, then realized it was his own mindless response to the wonderful feeling of having Cloud's tongue in his mouth.

He felt the older man pull him closer, then moaned again as Cloud's hand moved up his shirt to rub along his stomach and up to his nipples. Once again Riku began to panic, but Cloud must have felt it, because the hand receded to rest just above the pants line.

They continued to kiss and gently feel at each other for who knows how long. Time stood still as they made-out, their kiss only occasionally interrupted by Cloud moving to Riku's throat or Riku pulling away when he forgot to breathe. Small moans drifted to Riku's ears, some of them his, and some of them Cloud's. It was a strange, almost surreal feeling, one that Riku was enjoying thoroughly.

It wasn't until Cloud reached down to fondle the growing bulge in Riku's pants that the silver-haired teen became uncomfortable again. The second Cloud's hand touched the fabric Riku let out a gasp and pulled away, staring at Cloud incredulously. Cloud only grinned in return.

"Sorry," he said, pulling his hand away. Riku blushed.

"N…no, it's alright it's just…"

"You've never had anyone touch you there before." Cloud replied. "I can tell by your reaction."

"Yeah…" Riku looked away. "Maybe…"

"We should stop? If you want to." Cloud interrupted. "If you don't want me to touch you I won't. I'll stop whenever you want to."

Riku shook his head and hugged Cloud. "I want to be with you, and that means give my all to you. It's just…"

"Don't worry about it Riku. I'm in no hurry, and you shouldn't be either…we'll go as slow as you want..

Riku nodded, then sighed slightly and looked out the window. It was twilight out. "We should get back, they might wonder where we are."

Cloud nodded, then kissed Riku on the forehead. "I hope we can do this again sometime."

Riku blushed. "Yeah…right….well, we should get going." He stood up stiffly, wincing as his joints cracked, they were stiff from sitting in such a strange position for so long. Once his body got used to standing, he kissed Cloud on the cheek and smiled. "Night."

"Night Riku."

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Yay! Fluff! Gotta love the fluff right? Anyways, it's the anticipated RikxCloud action! Too bad it'll be short lived….um…should I be saying that? MWAHAHAHAHA, anyways, enjoy.

Please R&R!


	21. A Fatal Decision

-1**Title**: Dirge

**Pairing**: CloudXRiku!

**Rating**: M

**Warnings**: Yaoi , and violence, and bad language, lots of language. And Rape, which will not be included in the fan fiction version. You must read the media miner one (when I get it up) to read the rape scene.

**Music: **Meant to Live: Switchfoot

**Prompt**: Sin

**A/N: ** Sorry it took so long to update!

**Dirge: Chapter 21**

**A fatal decision**

Riku awoke in the middle of the night to fins two bright blue eyes staring into his own. Startled, he let out a small yelp before Roxas's hand covered his mouth.

"Shhhhh…" the blond hissed, letting go of Riku's mouth, "Come on, we need to talk."

Riku could only stare. Finally, he nodded slowly and got up, careful not to disturb Cloud and Squall, who were still asleep in their beds. When they got out into the main room, Riku crossed his arms and stared at Roxas.

"What's this all about?"

"Shhh…" Roxas replied, motioning him toward the stairs to the roof. "Come on, we'll talk up there."

Roxas and Riku made their way to the top of the stairs and onto the roof. The sky above them was clear, without any clouds, just stars shining brightly. The moon was full.

"What's this about Roxas?" Riku asked, crossing his arms once more. He was tired, and being woken up in the middle of the night was not something he enjoyed.

"It's Sora," Roxas replied. He held up Rku's sword. "Here, I got your sword, now come on; we have to go help him."

"What do you mean help him?" Riku asked again, staring at the sword as if it were a foreign object. "He's fine isn't he?"

"No he's not." Roxas growled, shoving the sword into Riku's face. "Now come on, we're going to the East side."

"Be we aren't allowed to go to the East-" Riku started, but Roxas cut him off.

"That's too bad. Sora went, during the middle of the night. If I know him, he's going to go after Kairi…If I had stopped him, I could have told him."

"Told him what?"

"Kairi is gone," Roxas said, looking over at Riku sadly. "She left yesterday. She got the money."

"From who??"

"….Tidus."

Riku's breath hitched. He stared at Roxas, disbelief evident in his eyes. "You have to be kidding me…"

"I'm not, now move it." Roxas growled. "I'll explain on the way."

They started off across the buildings, Riku still confused about exactly what was going on. "So…why would Tidus pay Kairi's way into the city?"

"Because the baby she's carrying is his." Roxas sighed. "Sora didn't know it, but Kairi worked in the House exclusively for Tidus. Where the little brat got the money from, I wouldn't know. When I found out, Kairi begged me not to say anything to Sora. She may have had to sleep with Tidus, but she didn't love him."

"So…why would Tidus want to pay Kairi's way into the city? If he's using her, I would think he'd want to keep her around."

"He found out about Sora's relationship with Kairi," Tidus growled. "He's just waiting for Sora to show up with the money by himself, so he can cut him down."

"Then why didn't he do that last time? When he was at the House? Tidus could have easily taken care of Sora then."

"Yeah, and he would have gotten killed by Cloud." Roxas paused a moment to look up at the moon and the stars. "He's not that stupid."

"So Sora doesn't know that Kairi is gone...?"

"No, and that's why we need to find him. If Sora gets to the House looking for Kairi, Tidus will kill him for sure, and there is nothing we can do about it. We have to find him before that and get him to stop."

"But what if this ends up in a fight? Why didn't you bring Cloud?"

"Are you kidding me? The argument we'd have to pull off to get Cloud or Squall to come with us would take forever. We don't have that kind of time."

"But none of us stand a chance against Tidus and his whole gang. We could all end up dead."

"Not necessarily. You beat Tidus before."

"That was a fluke…" Riku groaned and ran a hand though his hair. This could get ugly, very, very ugly.

"Well…let's just focus on finding Sora. If we're lucky, we can grab him and get out before anything bad happens."

------oOo---O---oOo------

"What were you saying about getting out before anything bad happens?" Riku growled as he held his sword in front of him for defense. Riku Sora and Roxas were surrounded by Tidus and four of his goons. Tidus was standing in the front, a smug smirk on his face.

"Well well, if it isn't Strife's lap dogs," he smirked. He cast his gaze over to Riku and frowned. "Nice earring."

Riku growled in response. "Just let us go and well leave. We don't want anyone to get hurt."

"That's too bad." Tidus replied, pulling out his sword. "Because I do."

"You touch us, and Cloud will come down on your head," Roxas growled. "We weren't here to do anything, just to visit a friend."

Sora said nothing; he simply stared at the ground. On his cheek was a good sized bruise from where Tidus had struck him before Riku and Roxas had shown up. Things were definitely not going the way they wanted.

"I don't care why you're here." Tidus spat, advancing the few feet to stand in front of Riku. He placed his hand under the silver-haired teen's chin, lifting his face up slightly. "I hate you're guts, and that means, I'll have to kill you."

Riku slapped Tidus's hand away and took a step toward him. "Back off and let us through before you find yourself dead."

"Oh yeah? And how are you going to manage that? You're outnumbered." Tidus grinned and nodded his head back at the boys standing behind him. "You so much as blink and they'll kill you."

Riku had his sword out in a flash, ready to slice Tidus's neck open, but was stopped when his cronies pulled out their weapons as well.

"You wanna risk it?" Tidus growled his eyes boring into Riku's. Even though they were the same height, Riku got the feeling that Tidus was looking down on him.

"Riku…" Roxas started. "Come on…let's…try to talk our way out of this…"

"Oh, you aren't getting out of this one." Tidus sneered. "I'll make sure of that. Cloud isn't here to save your ass."

"I don't need Cloud to save anything." Riku replied, flicking his sword up to point menacingly at Tidus's throat. "I can take care of myself."

"Is that so?" Tidus laughed as he pushed the sword away with the tip of his finger. "Prove it. You're the one I want anyways. You beat me, and we'll leave your little party alone, but if I beat you…well, I suppose I can do whatever I want."

Riku paused a moment and looked back at Roxas and Sora. Sora already had a few bruises on him, and Roxas looked like he was about to puke. Riku knew that a fight would be disastrous.

"Alright…"

"Riku don't!" Roxas started, but Riku cut him off with a glare.

"I'm sick of this Roxas, I'm stopping it now." He turned his attention back to Tidus. "Alright, but you have to let them go before we fight."

Tidus smirked and took a step back, "Alright. Fine by me. The brats can go, but you stay and fight."

Riku nodded and looked back at Roxas and Sora. Roxas was frowning. "Riku stop it, this isn't smart. We can get out of it if we all fight. You can't win on your own."

"I beat him before didn't I?" Riku spat. "Just get out of here, tell Cloud. I'll be fine."

Sora was silent, just staring at Riku. Finally, he set his key blade down and turned away. "Come on Roxas, let's go."

Roxas stared at his brother in disbelief. "You can't be serious…Sora?"

"I said come on." Sora growled. "Riku can take care of himself."

"You're little pals better get out of here." Tidus sneered. "Before I change my mind."

"Go on." Riku hissed. "I'll be fine."

With one last look back at Riku, Roxas sighed and allowed his brother to drag him off. He knew this would not turn out well, but there was nothing he could do about it.

Riku turned back to Tidus and glared. "Alright asshole, let's get this started."

"Not so fast." Tidus smirked. "We can't fight here, it's an alley. We're taking this to the wharf."

Riku cursed silently under his breath but decided to follow along. Besides, he was used to the water; it might serve as an advantage.

------oOo---O---oOo------

Riku was shoved violently into a grassy clearing a ways away from the main docks. There were no boats in this area, just grass and the river bank. If it wasn't for the full moon, there wouldn't even be enough light to see.

Tidus nodded his head at Riku and smirked. "You ready?"

"Are you?" Riku shot back with a sneer. "Come on."

Tidus only smiled and stepped forward, his sword at the ready. "I hope you learned how to fight this time, wouldn't want this to end too quickly…"

Riku allowed his anger to take hold. Tidus was really pissing him off, it was about time someone wiped that cocky grin of his off his face. Riku rolled up his sleeves, shivering in the cool night air. But he knew he wouldn't be cold long.

Tidus made the first move by slowly starting to circle his opponent, like a shark. Riku watched him carefully, backing away slowly. He was stopped when he felt a sharp pain in his ankle. He whirled to find one of Tidus's goons behind him. "What the hell?"

The blonde took that as a chance to strike. Before Riku could overcome his shock, Tidus rushed forward, slashing quickly at Riku's midsection. Riku just barely managed to stumble away, but he still got a good gash to his side.

"What the hell?" he cried, holding his side and wincing as he felt the blood come out. "That wasn't fair!"

"Who said anything about fair?" the boy smirked, lashing out again and catching Riku on the side of the head with the blunt end of the sword. Riku's head swam and he stumbled back, trying to get his bearings.

Tidus didn't let him recover though, he sliced at him again, barely missing as Riku dodged clumsily to the side and lashed out. Tidus dodged the attack easily.

"What's the matter? Too slow?" the blonde chuckled, circling slowly again. By this time, Riku had gotten his bearings again, but the throb in his side was clouding his thoughts, making it hard to come up with some sort of plan. Things were not going well at all.

He backed up again, and felt another pang of pain in his ankle. He didn't have to turn to know one of the cronies was behind him, slashing at his feet to keep him in the circle with Tidus. Stepping away so as not to get hit, he kept his eyes one Tidus, the main problem.

Tidus jumped in, feinting a slash at Riku's neck. Riku fell for it and moved to block, then yelped in pain as Tidus slashed his arm forcing him to drop his weapon. Tidus followed up by slamming the flat of the sword into his already wounded side, forcing Riku to his knees.

Tidus stepped forward and grabbed a fistful of Riku's hair, pulling it back and exposing the teen's neck. "Not so tough now are ya?" he laughed as he pressed the blade of his sword to Riku's throat. Riku choked.

"I thought not." Tidus smirked and pulled the sword away, then kicked Riku sharply in his injured side, sending him sprawling to the ground. Tidus pressed his foot to his chest and leaned down, his eyes shining with malice. "Now I think we'll teach you what it really means to live out here, and not in Cloud's soft bed."

Riku's eyes widened, unsure of what Tidus had in store for him. He had figured that losing would just mean he'd be killed….but…

Riku let out a shrill scream as the tip of Tidus's sword impaled his ear, just above the earring Cloud had given him. Tears formed involuntarily in his eyes at the pain of the flesh being severed.

Tidus leaned over and picked up the piece of ear, examining it closely before smiling and throwing it at one of his cronies. "I think Cloud might like to have that back, since he can't have you back. When we're done with you, that ear will be the biggest piece left."

Riku choked back a sob. Pain was still throbbing out of the side of his head, and blood was flowing from the cuts he'd received in the fight. What more could Tidus do to him?

Tidus laughed and moved his foot from his chest so he could lean down over the teen. Riku closed his eyes tightly, tears streaming down his face shamelessly. Tidus only smirked and pulled out a knife, running the blade slowly down Riku's neck to his collarbone, then sliding the blade under his shirt. "I think I have the perfect punishment for you. You see…I don't like to be stood up to." The fabric tore silently as the blade of the knife worked its way down the shirt. "And I resent the fact that you're Cloud's favorite toy." The knife stopped at the end of the shirt, and then flicked up, tearing the last of the fabric off and exposing Riku's upper body to Tidus's gaze.

"Please…" Riku choked. "Please don't…"

"I saw how you balled when that man kissed you in the House. What's the matter? Don't like being touched?" Tidus ran his hand down Riku's chest, pushing hard against the gash he'd made in the boy's side. Riku's breath hitched in fear and he tried to pull in on himself, away from Tidus's touch.

"N-no…" he pleaded, opening his eyes slightly to look at his attacker. Tidus simply laughed.

"No what? Don't touch you? Well, I'm going to do more than that, much more."

Riku's eyes widened and he tried to pull in on himself again, but Tidus simply grabbed his shoulders and pinned them to the ground, then sat on his stomach, using his weight to pin Riku to the ground.

Riku closed his eyes again, letting the tears fall freely. He pulled against Tidus's grip, but stopped when he received a blow to the head that made light flash behind his eyes. He groaned and went limp, submitting to whatever Tidus had in store for him.

Tidus began working on removing Riku's pants, sitting up so they could be pulled down around his ankles. When he had Riku all but naked, he motioned for one of his cronies to come over. "Seifer," he said. "How about we teach him what it's like to live in a House."

Seifer grinned and motioned the other boys over. "Sounds good to me."

oO-------------------------------------OoOoOoOoOoOoOoOoOoOoOoOoOo-------------------------------------Oo

Poor…Poor Riku. Eventually, I'll get the actual gang rape up on mediaminer. I will not put it on here though. It is far too graphic for the M rating, and really only belongs under X. I don't want to risk this story getting kicked off of Fanfiction for violating the terms. So if you want to read the rape, you are welcome to on my mediaminer account. I won't have it up for a while, but eventually I'll get it up and I'll tell you when you can look.

Happy I updated? I'm sure you are, but I'm also sure you hate me for…cutting off Riku's ear, having him get the crap beat out of him, and letting him get gang raped….I know. But I'm not heartless! I just love angst, and you can't get much more angst than that…or can you? Hmm…well, you'll have to see. I've finally gotten back into this story, so expect more soon.

R&R!


	22. Outside the Outside

-1**Title**: Dirge

**Pairing**: CloudXRiku!

**Rating**: M

**Warnings**: Yaoi , and violence, and bad language, lots of language. And Rape, which will not be included in the fanfiction version. You must read the media miner one (when I get it up) to read the rape scene.

**Music: **Mizerable: Gackt

**Prompt**: Sin

**A/N: ** 2 chapters in one day….wow…I'm tired and Riku hates me.

Riku: I hate you

Me: See?

**Dirge: Chapter 22**

**Outside the Outside**

A blonde man in his late twenties was sitting along the bank of the river, miles from both the Inside and Out. He carried with him only a pack, a knife, a fishing rod, and the clothes on his back. Currently he was asleep, laying back in the tall grass of the plains with his fishing rod stuck in the ground between his feet.

A wind kicked up, making the grass bend in an almost wave-like motion, light refracting off the tall grass stalks. The blonde man, Demyx as he called himself, rolled over, accidentally knocking the pole over. The clatter of the pole hitting the ground made enough noise to startle him into wakefulness.

Blinking, Demyx sat up and yawned, then turned to grab his pole and set it up again. He froze when he saw a flash of silver on the far bank. There was a dirty lump tangled in a few of the river-reeds that lined the bank. It looked like a person.

Curious, Demyx sat up and waded into the water. The river wasn't that wide at this point, and wasn't very deep either, he had no trouble making his way across to the dirty lump tangled in the reeds.

When he got there, he let out a low whistle from between his teeth. The lump was a boy, in his teens, naked and bloody. Demyx wasn't even sure if he was alive. "Hey…" he said, poking the boy gently in the ribs. "You alive?"

Riku groaned and tried to move away. He wasn't conscious; he was simply reacting to being touched. His body jerked involuntarily and rolled over, exposing the left side of his body.

Demyx whistled again. The whole left side of the teen was covered in cuts and bruises. His chest was all scratched up, as if someone had run a knife over it, and there was a large gash in his side that was already setting in with infection. Part of his ear was missing, and there was a large bruise that ran from the side of his head all the way down his neck to his shoulder. Handprints were evident in his neck where someone had tried to strangle him.

"What happened to you?" Demyx whispered quietly, running a hand down the battered body gently. There was no way to tell if he had internal bleeding or not. Slowly his eyes traveled lower and winced when he saw the bruises around the boy's lower half. It was obvious he had been raped.

Carefully, so as not to hurt the teen anymore than he had to, Demyx lifted him from the tangle of reeds and waded back to shore, where he set him down in the grass to get a better look. Further examination showed that the boy had to have been near death, and the only thing that probably saved him was the cold water he'd been floating in.

Frowning a moment, Demyx grabbed his pack and shuffled through it until he found what he was looking for, some antibiotic cream and a cloth. Careful not to move the teen too much, he began applying the cream to his wounds.

Riku's eyes opened briefly when the cream was rubbed into the gash in his side. He let out a long, low groan and tried to roll over, away from the pain. Demyx held him down firmly.

"Hey, come on…don't make this harder than it has to be."

Riku blinked and stared up at the man who was helping him. He didn't know who this person was, or where he was, but something told him the man was only trying to help. Taking a deep breath, Riku closed his eyes, and fell back into unconsciousness.

------oOo---O---oOo------

Cloud sank to his knees, tears suddenly appearing at the edge of his eyes, threatening to spill over if he wasn't careful. Squall stood a few feet away, indifference plainly written on his face. Sora and Roxas backed away appalled by the package that Seifer, Tidus's crony had left.

In a small box at Cloud's feet was half of Riku's ear, complete with earring. Next to it was a card that read, _"Don't mess with me."_

Cloud took in a shuddery breath and looked up at Sora and Roxas, who by now were looking away. "What…what happened?"

Sora looked at the ground, unable to look Cloud in the eyes. "I…I don't know, it just did."

"He said he'd fight Tidus...that he'd be fine." Roxas started. "He…he was supposed to be ok."

Cloud looked back down at the ear, then picked up the box and threw it, wincing as the metal earring bounced off the wall and landed with a clank on a metal plate on the floor. "He's dead! Dammit! He just turned 17 and he died!"

Squall sighed and pushed himself off the wall he was leaning on. "Yeah, so what? He's dead, get used to it." He started to walk away, but was stopped when Cloud's hand reached out and grabbed his pant leg.

"So what? Do you not even care that he's dead?"

Squall shrugged and pulled his leg away from Cloud. "People die, it happens. Get over it. If you want to do something about it, go kill Tidus, but leave me out of this."

Cloud stared at the floor. He was totally distraught. He didn't know what to do. He'd told Riku this would happen, he'd known it would. He just…he didn't think it would happen so quickly. Angrily he clenched his fist until he felt his nails draw blood. This was it, Tidus had crossed the line, and Cloud wouldn't stand for it any longer. Tidus was going to pay, and he was going to pay with his life.

------oOo---O---oOo------

Demyx deposited Riku's body onto a pile of blankets once he had come back to the small nomad tribe he lived with. A couple children came in, the girls giggling at Riku's nakedness, but Demyx shooed them away and left to go find the healer,

He came back a few moments later with a boy in his late teens in tow. Wakka, the healer, frowned when he saw the condition Riku was in. "You just left him like this?"

"Hey come on, what was I supposed to do?" Demyx asked, sighing. "I found him in the river for gods' sakes. Should I have just left him there?"

Wakka frowned again and leaned over Riku's still form, laying his head on his chest to listen to the heartbeat. "He's still breathin…that much is good at least ya?" Wakka glanced around a moment before reaching up and feeling the place where Riku's ear had been cut. "He's lucky here, if the cut'd been closer, he'd been paralyzed from the waist down."

"Will he be ok?"

"…With some rest…eh, maybe." Wakka replied. "He needs stitches on the cut though" He pointed to the large, semi-infected cut along Riku's side. "And his ass is gonna hurt big time for several weeks with a bruise like that."

Riku groaned and rolled over, half-coming into consciousness. "Where…where am I?"

"You're in good hands ya?" Wakka smiled, patting Riku on his non-bruised shoulder. Riku immediately winced and pulled away from the touch, making Wakka frown. "Well, you just rest here a while ya? We'll fix you up in no time."

Riku nodded tiredly and forced himself to relax. He half-closed his eyes when he heard the blonde man from earlier address the strange red-haired person with a funny accent. "It looks like he's been raped…"

"He's jumpy, that's for sure. You take care of him ya? I gotta go get some stuff."

Riku sighed and buried his face into the blanket he was sleeping on. He had no idea where he was, who these people were, or how he got there. All he knew was that he hurt, and that he wanted Cloud. Memories flashed through his mind about what Tidus and his gang had done, making revulsion and pain suddenly shoot up through his whole body. Without really thinking about it, he rolled to the side and puked as far from the blankets as he could.

"Hey!" Demyx yelped, running back into the tent. "Whoa, come on….now I've gotta clean that up...!"

"S-sorry…" Riku replied shakily, wiping his mouth with his hand. He started to move back into the blankets when he felt another wave of nausea hit him.

Demyx panicked and came over, grabbing Riku's hair and holding it back for him while the younger boy puked his guts out. "Hey man…you going to be ok?"

Riku closed his eyes, letting the tears fall again. "I don't know," he replied. "I…I don't know."

oO-------------------------------------OoOoOoOoOoOoOoOoOoOoOoOoOo-------------------------------------Oo

T-T I feel bad for Riku. I really do, and for Cloud, who now has snapped because his new lover is supposedly dead…Not my fault…it's my brain's fault, I swear.

ANYWAYS…

Hope you like the angst, please leave a Review!

R&R


	23. Cigarettes

-1**Title**: Dirge

**Pairing**: CloudXRiku!

**Rating**: M

**Warnings**: Yaoi , and violence, and bad language, lots of language. And Rape, which will not be included in the fan fiction version. You must read the media miner one to read the rape scene.

**Music: **Shut Up- Simple Plan

**Prompt**: Sin

**A/N: ** Hi. I put up the rape scene on media miner. Check my profile for the link.

**Dirge: Chapter 23**

**Cigarettes**

Riku awoke to snoring. That was something he wasn't used to. He started to turn over, but winced when his side shot pain all through his gut. So instead of moving his body, he elected to just move his head.

He was in a tent, lying on some sort of woven grass mat. There wasn't much else in the tent besides a backpack, a fishing pole, a small chest, and another mat with a blonde man lying on it, asleep and snoring.

Deciding to try sitting once more, Riku slowly forced himself to sit up, supporting his weight on his arms. At first a wave of dizziness overcame him and he almost fell, but somehow he managed to stay upright. When he felt steady enough, he brought one of his hands up to run through his hair slowly. '_Where am I?'_ he thought. The last thing he remembered was going with Tidus to the wharf to fight, the rest was a big blank.

A giggle roused him from his thoughts. He looked up to see a couple girls at the entrance to the tent, watching him intently. Not sure what else to do, he raised his hand slightly and waved.

The girls giggled again and ran away from the front of the tent. They were soon replaced by a red haired man in his late teens who came in with a roll of what looked like bandages. "Ah, I see you're awake ya?" he said, smiling.

Riku just blinked and stared at him. "Who are you?" he asked. "And where am I?"

"You're in the North Para Plains. Came here floatin' on the river looking like you tangled with a lion. Thought you were dead ya know?"

"So…I'm not on the Outside?…"Riku asked tentatively. "But…how did I get here?"

"Brother, you're outside the Outside. And like I said, you came down the river. Demyx over there found ya when he was out fishin'." At the mention of the name, the red-head pointed to the blonde who was still sleeping. "Thought you were dead till ya threw up."

"I…threw up?" Riku asked. He still wasn't entirely sure what was going on, or how he got there, all he knew was that he was in pain. "Why do I hurt so bad?"

"Think you should be telling me that one ya? You were raped though, that much is for certain."

Riku's mind was suddenly flung into overdrive. Raped. He'd….been raped.

Another pain shot through his side, causing him to topple over. Alarmed, Wakka came and kneeled over Riku's limp form.

"I was raped…" Riku groaned, tears floating to his eyes as he finally remembered what had happened to him. "Oh my God…I was raped."

"Hey calm down…":Wakka said soothingly. "You're in good hands now ya? Everything is going to be ok." He placed a gentle hand on Riku's shoulder, but the younger boy flinched at the touch and withdrew on himself. The haunted look he gave Wakka was one of distrust, and of fear.

"Who are you?" Riku asked. "Why are you helping me?"

"I'm a doctor ya? It's what I do. Besides, we gotta look out for each other out here. Don't got much if we don't got each other, know what I'm saying?"

Riku could only stare at this boy. He didn't know him, didn't know the other man in the tent, yet they had helped him. He didn't know whether to be grateful, or to hate them.

Another wave of nausea passed over the silver-haired teen. He leaned over to try to puke, but nothing came up but some flem and a little bit of blood. Riku wiped his mouth on his arm, staring at the blood.

"Oh, that's not good is it?" Wakka mumbled. He walked over to the little box Riku had seen earlier and opened it. He pulled out a small loaf of bread and handed it to Riku. "Here, eat this. It'll make your stomach feel better ya?"

Riku looked at the bread and wrinkled up his nose, not sure weather to accept it or not, but when nausea began to take him again he took it, only out of hope of not puking more.

The bread tasted good, it had various nuts and whole wheat in it, things that Riku didn't have the luxury of eating on the Outside. It had been so long since he had tasted something so sweet…

"Whoa, slow down there…" a different voice said. Riku looked up with his mouth full of bread to see the blonde man sitting up on his mat. "You'll choke if you keep eating like that."

Wakka chuckled. "Well if he came from the Outside he wouldn't have tasted food like that before ya?" He smiled and grabbed the bandages he had brought in. "Let him eat, I gotta change his bandages anyway."

Riku simply stared, chewing a little more slowly on the bread this time. Something in his mind shouted at him to be cautious, but part of him wanted to trust these men. When he swallowed he looked over at Demyx. "You…were the one who found me?"

"Yeah…" Demyx said, running a hand through his ….strangely styled hair. "I was fishing, found you tangled up in the reeds." He stpped a moment, then grinned. "Good thing I found ya huh? You might have died."

Riku looked down. "I wish I had…" he mumbled, suddenly not hungry anymore.

"Aw come on…you'll live, everything's good right?" Demyx smiled.

"No…" Riku sighed, dropping what was left of the bread onto the mat. "It's not." Tears welled up again and started to flow down his cheeks unconstrained. "I lost, and….then he….And what about Cloud? And Sora and Roxas….I let them down." Riku slowly lifted his hand and gently felt along the severed edge of his ear. "And those things they did…it…it hurt so bad."

Wakka only stared at Riku sadly. "You know brother, I've never had anything bad like that happen to me, but I feel for you ya?" He stretched out a hand to touch Riku again, then stopped as the younger boy flinched. "But it'll get better, you'll see."

"Yeah, you're with us now." Demyx grinned. "Everything will turn out ok, you'll see."

But Riku didn't feel better with that assurance. He suddenly felt desperately alone, and sick again. He wanted to hide in Cloud's strong arms, to push his head into his chest and fall asleep, like he had the day of Dirge. He wanted the comfort that his strong body could give. But most of all, he wanted to roll back the clock, and to stay in bed, instead of running off with Roxas.

"I want to go back," he said suddenly, looking up and looking Demyx in the eyes. "I want to go back to them."

Demyx's eyes softened some. "I'm afraid you can't, not yet."

"Why not?"

"You aren't healed. Can't walk back to the Outside all busted up like this ya?" Wakka held up the bandage he had grabbed earlier. "You comfortable with me wrapping you up?"

Riku stared a moment, then nodded. As much as he hated to admit it, the blonde man was right, he couldn't leave yet, and he might as well get fixed up while he was there.

--------OoOoOoO--------

Cloud was out for blood.

It was evident in the way he walked, in the way he talked, and in the frown on his face. He left the house more often, and Sora and Roxas began to worry that maybe, just maybe, Cloud was losing it. They knew he was upset about Riku's death, especially Roxas, who knew about their relationship, but the way he was acting, they were on the edge of a full-scale war.

On one of Cloud's excursions, he stopped over at Namine's place.

"Naminé?" He asked.

"Here!" the blonde called from a back room. Seconds later she appeared, a box in her arms. "You need something Cloud?" She plopped the obviously heavy box onto the counter and leaned over it, a smile on her face. "I have everything!"

"You have Tidus's head?" Cloud growled, causing several patrons to look up from their business at him.

Naminé sighed and looked at the table. "I was afraid of that….Look, Cloud, Riku died…that's true, but I think-"

"I don't give a damn what you think." Cloud hissed. At Naminé's hurt look he sighed and leaned on the counter. "I need cigarettes, you got any?"

"Thought you usually bought them from the kid on the corner…"

"He's out., now you go them or not?" Cloud growled. He wasn't in the mood to be arguing with people.

"Um…one second." Naminé replied. She ran into the back room and came back seconds later with a pack. "Here…it's on the house." She watched as Cloud immediately pulled out one of the sticks and lit up, shoving it in his mouth forcefully and taking a long, deep drag off it. "Cloud…I'm worried about you.

"Don't be." Cloud growled, taking another long drag. "I'm fine."

"You sure don't act fine…"

"I said I'm fine!" Cloud shouted, slamming his fist onto the counter and causing Naminé to jump.

"Cloud….I ..think you better leave."

Cloud only grunted, grabbed the pack of cigarettes, and walked toward the door. "Later."

------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Poor Cloudy Cloud. He's Emo….but that's how he's suppost to be so haha.

You hate me don't you? You know you do.

I so botched up Wakka's speech. But cut me some slack, I haven't played FFX in a year and it's been several months since I've played KH, and I don't have my game right now, (my friend took it for the summer)

**BlackIceNinja**: Yay, I'm glad you think it was worth the wait. Sorry it took so long, I've been busy…sleeping…Yeah, I don't do much during the summer but sleep. As for Leon, I'm pissed at him cuz I am, so I made him do bad things hehe.

**Insueka-Laneya-Comagtochi**: I'll update soon. And when have I written anything not sad?…..I don't think I have have I?….

**iamsosmrt: ** nice screen name. Anywho, I've updated! With more angst to go around .

**ChibiFrubaGirl:** I like's Demyx, and Wakka, but I'm scared that I screwed up Wakka's talking. I havn't played the game or FFX in a long time…

**SasukeXNaruto7**: Yeah, cutting his ear off was harsh, but it adds to the drama don't you think?…..

**Phaz: **well if you want to read the rape scene, you need to go to my media miner. But other than that, it's all the same as here, cept less stories.

**Combo-bass:** hehe. Puppy Eyes down't work on me. You'll have to suffer with the knowledge that….SOMETHING happens that you won't like. It may be mean, but we love them, and love to see them suffer (or at least I do.) Also, glad you are in love with this story!

**Zuki Ravenwood**: Unique name, I like. Popsicle sticks…haha….nice torture device.


	24. Setup

-1**Title**: Dirge

**Pairing**: CloudXRiku!

**Rating**: M

**Warnings**: Yaoi , and violence, and bad language, lots of language. And Rape, which will not be included in the fanfiction version. You must read the media miner one (when I get it up) to read the rape scene.

**Music: **Mizerable: Gackt

**Prompt**: Sin

**Dirge: Chapter 24**

**Setup**

It took another couple days before Riku was well enough to even stand up, let alone do anything. While he was bedridden, Demyx and Wakka took care of him, with the addition of a tribe girl every few hours. Apparently, there were not very many men in the tribe, let alone some with silver hair. The girls found him attractive, and they would take any opportunity they could get to come and stare.

At least, that was what Demyx told him. Riku wasn't sure if that was all true, or if the blonde was simply trying to make him feel better. In any event, Riku found out a lot of information during those days.

Apparently, he had drifted miles downriver, carried by the current of the North river. He was now in the plains, far north of the main city and the Outside. Riku had originally come from a small city to the west, so the thought of there being people who didn't live in cities was foreign and strange to him. His world consisted of the Inside and Out, but never any farther than that. The North Para Plains, the place he currently resided in, were beyond his limited experience.

And the people were even more bizarre. They didn't use the technology that Riku was used to having even on the Outside. Generators, hover carts, trains, even guns were foreign to these people. They lived off the bow and knife, hunting the animals on the plains for their needs and harvesting berries and nuts for food. The tribe worked together for the good of the whole, and no one went hungry or unattended to.

Riku may not have known about these people, but they sure knew of him, or at least, where he came from. The village had taken in refugees from the Outside before. In fact, Demyx was one. He had come from the same Outside city Riku had been living the last few months of his life in. He'd escaped years ago, setting himself adrift on a makeshift raft in an attempt to escape the pain of the Outside. What he found was unity, and love among the people of the Plains.

But as good as everything was out on the Plains, Riku found a deep longing in his heart to go back to Cloud and the others. Wakka and Demyx didn't understand his strange obsession with getting back, but neither did they hinder it. According to them, it would be a long journey back for him. The river's current was too strong to try to sail using a boat with no motor, so he'd have to walk, and to do that, he'd have to be healthy.

Wakka was very insistent on that. He would not let Riku move much, instead he forced the boy t sit, eat, and heal. After a while Riku gained so much nervous energy he felt like he would explode if he didn't do _something_.

"You can come fishing with me if you want." Demyx offered one morning. "You can stretch your legs; maybe get a little more information about where you're at."

Riku had only agreed absently, just to get out of the tent and into the sunlight. But when he had finally ventured out, he couldn't believe his eyes.

The Plains were a vast expanse of just open grassland, broken only by an occasional tree and the riverbank. The sun glinted off the tall wild grass, making it shine a brilliant golden amber color that shifted with every breeze. If Riku hadn't been in pain, he would have climbed the nearest tree to look out over the ocean of grass. 

"It's beautiful…" he stated as he followed Demyx down some nearly hidden paths toward the river. "I've never seen anything like this…"

"Few people have." Demyx chuckled. "There are no cities up there until you reach the Ocean. The only people that even see this place come on the merchant boats, and they don't stop along the riverbank because of lions and stuff."

"Lions?"

"Large meat eaters, big teeth, lots of hair." Demyx replied. "But you don't need to worry about them, they rarely attack humans. Not that the merchants know that. They think we're all savages out here, never even stop to say hello."

When they made it to the riverbank, Demyx set up his pole and laid down against a rock. Riku sat down nearby and looked out across the river. The water here was a clearer, healthier looking blue, unpolluted by the cities waste.

"It's so beautiful out here…" Riku commented. He reached down into the water, letting the cool liquid flow across his fingers.

"It is isn't it?" Demyx replied, beaming and shifting his position a little. "You sure you want to leave this stuff out here and go back to the Outside? We'll take care of you you know."

Riku looked down and removed his hand from the water. The ground suddenly seemed very interesting to him. "Well, you see, I have to go back. I can't just leave them."

Demyx sighed and stretched out slightly over his rock. "Why not? I did, and I'm a hell of a lot happier out here. It still takes work to survive, but you don't have to watch your back and act like a thief. The people here are honest, and they care about each other. Where are you going to find that on the Outside?"

Riku thought about that. What Demyx said was true, the Outside was tough, and there were few people who cared about anyone.

But in that respect, he was also wrong. Riku had found a home on the Outside, with people he cared about, who have and would help him when he was in trouble. People who cared about him, if no one else, at least Cloud.

"I want to go back…," he whispered to himself.

Demyx looked over at him, a small smile on his lips. "Yeah, I know you do."

----------OoOoOoOoOoOoOoO--------

Pain shot up Cloud's arm when his fist connected with the wall next to Seifer's head. But he didn't care. He could focus on was giving the kid as much hell as he could. The boy looked up at him fearfully, clutching weakly at the hand around his neck.

"I…I didn't do anything!" Seifer choked. His eyes were bright with fear and his whole body was trembling as Cloud held him against the wall.

The older male leaned in, so that his face was barely above Seifer's. "I don't want your excuses…" Cloud breathed. Seifer flinched and closed his eyes, waiting for the pain he knew he'd feel. When it didn't come he opened his eyes slowly.

"You go back to your little friend Tidus and tell him this is going to end. I'm sick of him and his little posse out there playing gang, and it's about time I showed him his place."

Seifer nodded slowly, too terrified to say anything.

"Oh, and tell him this, he's going to pay for what he did to Riku, and he's going to pay tenfold."

Seifer gulped. "But-"

Cloud tightened his grip on Seifer's throat and slammed his head back into the wall, making the younger boy see stars. "Understood?"

Seifer choked out a weak "yes" before Cloud dropped him to the ground.

"Now get the hell out of my sight before I kick your ass." Cloud growled, reaching for his sword. Seifer didn't hesitate, he simply scrambled away.

Cloud angrily reached into this pocket to grab the pack of cigarettes he'd gotten from Naminé, but when he pulled it out, he found only one of the addictive little sticks in the pack. Sighing, he shoved it in his mouth and lit up, taking a slow drag off it.

Squall watched from his perch atop one of the buildings behind Cloud. A small smile was on his face. "Just according to plan…" he murmured.

.------------------------------------OoOoOoOoOoOoOoOoOoooOoooOoOoOOOoOO-----------------------------------------

HAHAHAHAHAHAHA

SO CLOSE TO THE END!

I stayed up late last night, I couldn't sleep. Because….I had the whole ending of this story playing out in my mind. Eventually I just got up, and wrote down the whole last chapters in a nearby notebook. Now that it's daytime, I'm writing up everything on the comp.

Soooooo….the end is near! Be happy as I write the tragic, angst, beautiful ending I have in mind. You are all going to hate me, but hey, it's my story, and it's labeled angst, so if you aren't prepared for that…well…why are you reading this?

Love you all, please drop a review.

-Koji


	25. Begining of the End

-1**Title**: Dirge

**Pairing**: CloudXRiku!

**Rating**: M

**Warnings**: Yaoi , and violence, and bad language, lots of language. And Rape, which will not be included in the fanfiction version. You must read the media miner one to read the rape scene.

**Music: **Malchik Gei [English version -Tatu

**Prompt**: Sin

**Dirge: Chapter 25**

**The Beginning of the End**

Two weeks had passed since Riku had been found on the bank of the river. The bruises that had marred his body were nearly healed, and most of the cuts were closed up. The only serous injury still unhealed on his body was the large gash in his side. Wakka had stitched it up, but he warned that any sudden movements could re-open the wound. Because of it's placement on the torso, it was in serious danger of breaking open.

But other than that, Riku's physical condition was better than ever. On the steady diet of nuts, berries, and fresh meat he received from the tribe, he began to look healthier, and the sun was slowly tanning his skin and making it lose a bit of the unhealthy paleness he'd acquired.

As for his mental condition though, Riku couldn't have been worse. He thought he had felt bad when his father had died and he'd been stranded on the Outside, but the cloud that hung over his head during his stay at the tribe made him feel many times worse. Despite Wakka's and Demyx's attempts to befriend him and make him stay, Riku always found himself staring South down the river and back to the city. The Outside might have been worse, but it was still his home.

To ease his mind of the loneliness that was nipping at the edge o his mind, Riku helped out with the village chores. At first he only did small things, like help sharpen the knives or help with the cooking, but as his body began to heal, he gradually began helping with other chores such as gathering berries and nuts or going fishing.

The girls of the village fond this amusing, especially when Riku cooked. He got a small entourage fallowing him around every minute of the day. He only found peace from it when he managed to sneak away with Demyx. All together life was good for him, but he still felt the longing to head back to Cloud and the others.

The surprise came when Demyx invited him on yet another fishing expedition. The blonde seemed to like heading down to the river and doing nothing. Rarely did he ever actually catch a fish, but Riku didn't mind. He liked going down to the river and sitting atop the rocks there.

"You want to go back don'tcha?" Demyx asked. Riku looked down and fiddled with a tuft of grass, slowly ripping it up by the roots.

"Yeah…" he conceded. "I do. Cloud and the other's must think I'm dead by now…"

Demyx smiled and reached behind him to pull out a small pack. He handed it to Riku. "Here…" he said. "You can't make it back without some food… and there's a knife in there, in case you need it."

Riku simply stared, not really believing what Demyx was telling him. Slowly he took the pack and opened it. Sure enough, inside was a loaf of bread, some dried meat, and a small canteen of water. A dagger-like knife was nestled between the food, wrapped in it's leather sheath.

"Y…you mean it?" Riku asked, looking up at Demyx. "I can leave?"

Demyx shrugged and smiled. "Sure. Wakka's going to kill me, but you can leave. I don't like you looking so miserable. You should e happy, and if going back to the Outside will make you happy, then go ahead and go."

Overcome with happiness, Riku leaned forward and hugged Demyx tightly, almost spilling the contents of the pack in the process. "Thank you!" he cried. "You don't know how much this means to me."

"Yeah I do." Demyx smiled. "Now get out of here. It'll take you till night to reach the Outside, and you don't want to get caught on the Plains at night. Hyenas and lions won't care if you're human if you're stumbling around in the dark."

Riku nodded and stood up, shouldering the pack and sliding the dagger into his belt. "Thank you so much." he said softly. "I'm going to miss you guys."

"Yeah yeah, get out of here before I change my mind." Demyx replied with a smile. "Just follow the river, it'll take you back to the East docks."

Riku looked out across the river and the expanse of plains that followed it. He was going back. '_Cloud'_ he thought._ 'I'm coming.'_

-------OoOoOoOoOo--------

Cloud had his own agenda though. His blood had been boiling ever since he had found out about Riku's death. After his little run in with Seifer, a fight would be inevitable.

It was two weeks since Riku Roxas and Sora had journeyed to the East side, two weeks since Cloud had seen the silver-haired teen. Two weeks for anger and hatred to grow in the pit of Cloud's stomach.

And it was all coming out tonight.

Six people stood in the main room of Cloud's house, some sitting on the ground, and some leaning on the wall. Two of these people were Squall and Cloud. The rest were familiar faces to both of them, Zexion, and Vincent, as well as others that had known Cloud since he had been bought from the House by Zack. They were friends, but most importantly, they were sword arms.

"Tonight…" Squall started. "We're going into the East side, and we're going to finally exterminate that pest Tidus, who thinks that he controls the whole territory."

Several people nodded, Zexion included. They knew what a pest Tidus was, it wasn't uncommon for people to run into him on their visits to the East side. It would be easy to get them to agree to a conflict.

Squall's lips curved upwards into a small smile. "Good, I'm glad we all agree. We head out tonight, we'll back them up to the wharf, then toss them into the river once they're good and dead. Any questions?"

Cloud, who had been staring at the floor the whole time, lifted his head slowly. "Tidus is mine," he said simply, malice dripping from his voice. "If anyone touches him, I'll kill them."

The whole room was silent, everyone's attention focused on Cloud. Some people wore an expression of shock at the change in his attitude, others were smiling. In any event, there was one thing that was for certain.

Tidus wouldn't survive this upcoming battle.

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Owwwwww……

My wrist hurts from typing too much…and I need more music. Seriously, listening to the same music over and over is getting boring…..

Anywho, you don't want to listen to me complain. SO, WITHOUT FURTHER ADO……

I give you, the last chapter of Dirge. Please continue on and enjoy.

-Koji


	26. Wait for Me

-1**Title**: Dirge

**Pairing**: CloudXRiku!

**Rating**: M

**Warnings**: Yaoi , and violence, and bad language, lots of language. And Rape, which will not be included in the fanfiction version. You must read the media miner one to read the rape scene.

**Music: **Mizerable: Gackt

**Prompt**: Sin

**A/N: This is the final chapter. This is the end! The second multi-chapter story I've ever finished. And it's 26 chapters long, and over 100 pages. I'm proud of this work, and hope you enjoyed this story as much as I did. Well, you've waited and been patient with my strange updating habits, so here you go, the final chapter of Dirge**

**Dirge: Chapter 26**

**Wait for me**

Cloud paused and closed his eyes, allowing his breathing to calm down. He and the others were on the edge of the East side, waiting until the signal was to be given. Casting his gaze toward the sky, he frowned as dark rolling thunderheads moved in slowly. It was going to rain.

Sora came up beside Cloud, worry written all over his face. "Cloud…" he started, but Cloud held up a hand to stop him.

"Any sign of them?…"

"They're down at the wharf, like Squall said they would be. But…"

"But what?" Cloud growled. He wasn't in the mood for any kind of complication.

"But I don't think we should go through with this Cloud. I mean, people are going to get hurt."

"We all get hurt. That's unavoidable." Cloud growled. "Don't try to make me change my mind. I'm going through with this. Tidus has to pay for what he did."

"I've just…never seen you so bloodthirsty…" Sora said. He looked out over the streets before them and sighed. "You're scaring me."

Cloud grunted and shifted his weight, blinking as the first raindrop fell and hit him on the nose. It was almost as if the sky were crying over what was about to occur.

"Get ready Sora." He finally replied. "We move out soon."

----------------------------------------

It was late afternoon, nearly dark when the Outside finally came into view. The large city behind it was easily recognizable even from a distance, but the actual Outside was harder to locate until you came fairly close. Riku smiled. He was almost home.

Riku made to take another step when a drop of rain hit him on the face and ran down to drip off onto the ground. It was soon followed by another drop until the sky seemed to open up and it began to rain.

Riku looked up in annoyance at the clouds above him. He was nearly home, and now it started to rain. It hadn't rained hardly at all during his life on the Outside, and the one day he was traveling, it decided to rain. Riku sighed and picked up his pace a little. He wanted to get home before he became completely soaked to the bone.

----------------------------------------

The rains showed no intention of letting up. Cloud sighed and shuffled nervously in his now wet clothing. The rain would make things harder. The ground by the wharf would be slippery, the footing unsure. He was staring to wonder if this was such a good idea.

"Not getting cold feet are you Cloud?" Squall asked, coming up beside his friend. Cloud simply shrugged.

"You mean that literally or metaphorically?"

Squall frowned. "Let's just concentrate on the fight. It's almost dark, we should be leaving soon." Cloud nodded absently. "Oh come on Cloud…" Squall said, wrapping a friendly arm around the blonde's shoulder. "Everything is going to be fine."

Roxas appeared then, seemingly from nowhere. "It's time." he said, before dashing off to the others. Cloud shrugged off Squall's friendly gesture and started walking down the street toward the wharf.

"We'll know that once this is finished."

Squall frowned and walked off, heading around a different way to get to the wharf. Cloud ignored him and continued down the street he was on, thoughts of vengeance swirling in his mind. He was going to kill Tidus, he was going to make him pay.

The rain was falling harder now, drenching Cloud's clothing and his hair. The dirt street began slowly churning into mud beneath his feet. Fighting would be difficult on that ground.

Cloud appeared at the docks in time to see several of his friends already there, looking out over the soon to be battlefield. Tidus and his gang were waiting in front of the riverbank, weapons already drawn.

"I see you actually have a spine." Tidus grinned wiping some of his drenched hair from his face. "I didn't think you'd actually have the guts to come here."

Cloud didn't respond, he had already told himself he wouldn't fall to Tidus's taunts. Instead, he simply pulled out his sword and held it at his side, determination written on his face.

"What's the matter?" Tidus called out again. "Cat got your tongue?"

Cloud walked forward until he was halfway between Tidus and his own gang. After a moment, Tidus stepped out to meet him.

Cloud glared down at the boy in front of him, the effect enhanced by the rain pounding down on them, muffling the outside noise.

"I'm going to kill you." Cloud said simply. Tidus smiled.

"I'd like to see you try."

-------------------------------------

Riku growled to himself as he sloshed through the pile of mud that his pathway had become. The riverbank was already swollen with water, and the rain showed no sign of letting up. It was nighttime now, and the only reason Riku could see where he was was because of the bright lights from the City. Even so, the rain made visibility terrible.

Riku silently cursed as his shoe was sucked from his foot. He reached down and tried to pull it out, but only found himself sinking deeper into the muck. When he finally retrieved the shoe, he lifted his foot up….only to have the other shoe taken away.

"Dammit!" he cursed, flinging the shoe away from him in frustration. He pulled his feet from the mud and continued walking, ignoring the strange feeling of the mud against his bare feet. He was going to get back, even if he had to do it barefoot.

After much struggling through the mud he finally made it to the dirt streets of the Outside, which were better, but not by much. The only difference was that he didn't sink every step he took. Footing was still treacherous, and if he didn't watch himself, he could find his face in the mud.

The clank of steel on steel roused Riku's attention. He barely heard it through the thick pounding of the rain, but he was sure he had heard it. It was coming from the wharf.

Something inside Riku wanted to explore what the noise was, curiosity won out over common sense and he made his way through the streets to the docks. When he peaked around the corner of the building, his heart jumped into his throat.

Tidus and his gang were fighting with Cloud and his gang. Cloud and Tidus were up on a raised platform, probably to escape the slickness of the mud. Cloud was fending off Tidus's attacks easily, but on the same note, Tidus was dodging just as easily. Off to the side, on the ground, Riku spotted Sora and Roxas ganging up on Seifer, and around them, other people Riku recognized and some he didn't were fighting each other.

He started to step out of the shadows, but was stopped by a firm pressure on his shoulder. Riku yelped in surprise and spun around to face his attacker.

It was Squall. Riku let out a small breath of relief and smiled. "Squall!" he said. "You scared me. Hey, what's going on down there…why are Cloud and Tidus fight-"

He was cut off as Squall's open hand connected with his head, knocking him down from the shock of the slap.

"W-what?" Riku gulped, grabbing his face and looking up at Squall in surprise. The brunet didn't even look at him, he simply moved between Riku and the battlefield and raised his Gunblade.

"It's your fault." Squall smirked, taking careful aim with the gun. "You see, after your little "incident" with Tidus, Cloud grew….angry I guess you could say. Turns out, he was quite fond of you."

Riku's brow furrowed, he wasn't sure where Squall was going with this. "So? Why-"

"It was a simple plan to begin with, I could get rid of you and Cloud in one sweep. This gang was supposed to be mine." Squall leveled the Gun and squinted, adjusting the focus to target toward the platform where Tidus and Cloud were fighting. Riku frowned.

"What…what are you doing?"

"Ending this…" Squall replied, putting his finger on the trigger. Riku's eyes widened. He was going to kill Cloud.

"No!" Riku yelled, grabbing the dagger from his belt. Jumping up, he managed to fall into Squall, knocking the brunet off balance. "You can't kill him!"

"Get off me!" Squall growled, smacking Riku in the head with the edge of the Gunblade. Riku saw stars, but he held on, desperately trying to get a good grip on his dagger. Squall finally saw the weapon, and dropped the Gunblade, grabbing Riku's wrist instead.

"No way." Squall hissed. "I'm not letting you take this chance from me."

"Fuck you," Riku replied, struggling to pull his wrist from Squall's grasp. "I'm not going to let you kill him."

Squall began to squeeze Riku's wrist, half-forcing it open. If that continued, Riku would lose the knife. Scared and confused, he did the only thing he could think of to do.

He bit Squall on the nose.

"Fuck!" Squall yelled, releasing Riku on a reflex. Before he could reach out to grab at the knife again, Riku jammed it down between his ribs, right into his heart.

Squall's eyes started to widen. "You…little shit…" he murmured before he lost his strength. His head fell back, hitting the mud with a sickening squelch

Riku jumped back, the same fear he felt the last time he had killed taking over his heart. "Oh shit…" he started.

But his logical mind took over, forcing the panic down. It was alright, Squall had tried to kill Cloud. It was self defense. It was alright.

Running a hand through his hair to calm himself down, Riku moved away from the body to the edge of the battlefield. He watched as Tidus and Cloud danced around each other. Neither of the males seemed to show any signs of slowing down, despite their constant movement.

A shout tore Riku's attention away from the battle. He looked to the side, and saw Sora, eyes wide with disbelief, staring at him.

"RIKU!" he yelled.

The next few moments would be burned into Riku's memory for the rest of his life.

He looked back over to Cloud.

Cloud was staring at him, his attention caught by Sora's shout.

Tidus took his opportunity.

Even from the distance he was at, Riku saw Cloud's eyes widen as Tidus's sword slid into his stomach and came out his back, pinning him to the support beam behind him. It happened so fast, Riku didn't even have time to gasp. Cloud's body convulsed once as he grabbed at the sword, then he went limp. Tidus stepped away from the body, his breathing ragged from the fighting.

Riku's mind screamed. All coherent thought flew out the window as he stared at his lover's body hanging limply, supported only by the sword. Before he knew what he was doing, his hand was around the handle of the discarded Gunblade.

It took only a few seconds to raise the weapon, aim, and pull the trigger.

Tidus's body was knocked back by the force of the bullet hitting him square in the head. The retort from the gun was loud enough to muffle even the rain, causing everyone to stop what they were doing and look up at the source of the noise.

Riku dropped the gun and ran toward the stage, slipping and sliding in the fresh mud. He vaulted over the edge of the platform, wincing as his stitches were ripped open. "Please…" he begged the air as he scrambled over to Cloud's body. He stood up and raised a hand to grab at the blonde's hair. "Please be alive…"

There was no response, but when Riku leaned forward, pressing his body against Cloud's and wiping away the rain-slicked hair, he saw two eyes, half closed in pain staring at him.

"Oh my God…" he sobbed, rubbing his thumbs soothingly over Cloud's cheeks. "Oh my God you're alive."

Cloud only stared back, but Riku could feel the slight movement of his chest as he struggled to breathe. Cloud may have been alive, but he wouldn't be for long. A fresh wave of tears hit Riku as he realized that fact. Cloud couldn't survive this.

"Cloud…" he pleaded. "Don't leave me…"

The blonde's eyes narrowed some, whether in pain or some show of emotion Riku didn't know. A breathy whisper escaped Cloud's lips.

"What?" Riku asked in alarm. He pressed his face up to Cloud's, desperate to hear the words. "What?"

"….I….love….you…"

Riku's heart stopped. He had heard the words before, but right now, at this moment, with his lover bleeding, dieing, they meant so much more than they did before. He tried to choke back a sob, but failed.

"I love you too…" he choked, rubbing his cheek gently against Cloud's, then moving it to look him in the eyes. "I love you too…" He pressed his lips against Cloud's in one, desperate, final kiss with his dieing lover.

A shaky sigh left Cloud when their lips separated, and his eyes grew dim. Riku knew he was dead.

Despair rushed over him in a fresh flood, making Riku's mind go numb. Slowly he reached down, grabbed the hilt of the sword, and slid it almost effortlessly from Cloud's stomach. He tossed it aside and grabbed Cloud's body as it fell, his knees buckling under the sudden weight.

Riku sunk to his knees, burying his face into Cloud's chest, desperate to find a heartbeat that wasn't there. The rain was quickly robbing the body of heat, making it seem even more lifeless.

Huge, body-shaking sobs wracked through Riku as he clutched desperately at the corpse. This wasn't happening. It wasn't supposed to turn out this way.

The world around Riku was dead, frozen in the boy's mind. All he saw was Cloud, and the way he looked as he died. He was blinded to Tidus's body lying just behind him, blind to the blood running from Cloud's stomach and soaking into Riku's shirt, mixing with the fresh blood from the torn stitches. He was blind to the pounding of the rain, and to the people slowly dispersing and leaving the field. He was blind to the two boys walking up behind him, shock and fear written on their faces.

He was blind to it all.

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It had been nearly a year since the gang fight. Riku sat atop the same rusted out metal fire escape on the edge of town, near the North waterway. A cigarette hung limply from his lips.

In the distance the Dirge song could be heard as the monks made their monthly rounds, collecting the dead. Riku found himself singing the all-too familiar song under his breath, entranced by the haunting melody.

Stretched before him was the grassy slope that lead to the waterway, the same spot where Riku had first come to the Outside. A few feet to his right, at the top of the hill, was a pile of stones with Cloud's giant sword stuck through the top. Riku smiled to himself and flicked the cigarette away.

"Heh, you're a bad influence Cloud. I'm beginning to pick up your bad habits." Riku said to Cloud's grave. "But I guess that's alright."

A breeze picked up, blowing across the grass and bringing the salty small of the water to Riku's nose. "Yeah," the teen laughed. "I love you too."

As the sun began to climb in the sky and last echoes of the Dirge song died away, Riku stood up and brushed himself off. He had grown in the year since Cloud's death. He was taller, more fit. He had lost that cite, child-like innocence, he was now a young man on the verge of adulthood. He looked the part of Cloud's heir.

Sora and Roxas quietly walked up behind Riku, looking out over the grave and the waterway beyond.

"You ready for tonight?" Sora asked softly. "The merchant is only a few hours upriver."

"Yeah…" Riku replied, picking up the Gunblade from it's resting spot against the building. "You guy's go ahead and get ready, I'm going to say goodbye."

Roxas and Sora nodded, then left as silently as the had come. Riku closed his eyes, enjoying the breeze for a few more seconds. When he opened his eyes, he was filled with a new peaceful feeling.

"I'll be back soon…" he said to the grave, turning around and slowly walking back toward town. "Wait for me."

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**THE END**


End file.
